Two things right off: the sun is way too big and bright; I think you’re looking for a relaxed feel to the pic, and this is too intense. Make a small, reddish glow around the sun perhaps with a small lensflare, and make it smaller.
The other thing is the perspectives, as in foreground vs background.
I would really try to put one hut up front, so it looks like you’re actually part of the pic, and put in something in the background, Maybe a small island or a mountain chain.
Right now it looks flat, and it looks like “the islands at the end of the world”
I would also make the bridges a bit more rickety and “home made”, but thats taste again…
Right Im not sure im gonna be liked much after this…but after all this is meant to be the Serious Critique section…
Firstly I’d like to say to the creator that this maybe a bit harsh…but if you are serious about CG then you should listen and abovve all not take it personally.
Presumably from the image you are fairly new to this…and for starters you show promise but if you want to improve you need to…wait for it…
basically you need to start again, the image is garish, bare, primitive. The texturing and lighting is poor and the modelling very basic. Now please bare in mind that this is all part of the learning curve and certainly NOT saying you are no good at CG…in fact I’m sure once you have spent some time learning the different techniques you will be very good at it…
I think you are trying to do too much at one time, and consequently making a little mess. Take it slowly, stage by stage…create a new more detailed hut, making sure you have modelled it correctly, i.e bevels etc.
Take some time in learning how to apply UV maps and textures correctly…make sure the colour work together…use reference if you aint sure.
Practice lighting a single hut on its own, to get a feel for how you want it to look, as well as making sure the textures work.
Learn to blend in the sky and sea better…instead of having a seriously harsh line…
You have chosen to have a real wide camera angle which means naturally the scene looks bare and the models look obviously duplicated…change the texures slightly…
think about what needs to be in the scene…the reeds in the sea just dont make sense or look right…I think you are just trying to cram too much in.
Obviously theres a lot more to learn and do…check out tutorial sites to get tips…and remember to take it one stage at a time, don’t rush. Please don’t let this message dishearten you, my early stuff was equally requiring improvement.
Now a quick message to the other people who commented…
I presume this section of the forum is under the SERIOUS heading…now just commenting saying its “awesome” is not going to do the guy any favours what so ever…if you think this image was awesome then you comments are really not relevant…keep em to the normal critique section…
I know this will get yours backs up…but come on, really …judges need to be people who have the experience to give a good critique otherwise this whole section is pointless.
Ahhh thanks I think… I will start over “damn” I might just build one hut and make it very very detailed along with a few other bits and pieces thanks for the novel I…I mean comments
nice work dude,
The real glaring issue (pun intended har har har) is those highlights man I mean I understand the whole sunshine thing. really wow I mean its a good pic but really have you or i ever seen a sunset with that ammount of glare on the water? really I would bring that down.
Also since this is evocative, you might want to evoke something. Right now its kinda evoking that good old MINE EYES ARE BURNING… sorry bad attempt at humor don’t think thats a flame its really not… oh god not more puns flame glare geez its like I need my eyes washed out… wow washed out good god I am on a role.
Neways I like the pic man just if you brought the glare or highlights on the water down a tad you might be able to bring more color into it. Right now the white is dominating your picture. When I think of islands and fat lil polynasians (sp) in huts I can’t really see white washed out you might just want to add some reds and yellows in to that you know the stuff you see on picture post cards.
After all those pictures are taken with the intent of evoking something right? just my two cents.
To make this brief, white isn’t evoking the feeling that you want. Okay the feeling that i THINK you want lol i mean you are the artist its all up to you in the long run don;t forget I am only a poster and a pretty crappy artist lol.
neways see ya dude
Here are some improvements you could myke to your images. These comment only apply to modeling.
First, all your huts are copies or look really like they are. Huts are builds by men with material from the wild, there should be some differences between each huts, even if they have the genaral same shape. You could add details to all of them or simply modify them a bit. For example, rotate the tree so that it is not faceing in the same direction on all the huts. You could also add some simple randomization by pulling and pushing some vertices a bit so that the surface is not perfect. Nothing has a perfect shape ! By varying a little bit scales and translate of your object you can also add some more natural feeling.
Same for all the objects. Of course don’t do this on all the decks, but you could can simply select some random a pieces and scale them and rotate them a bit, it will do the trick.
If you are patient enough, through modeling you can tell a lot. They is a lot of “image strenght” in the amount of detail you give to your models. This does not always mean high polygon count, with simple tricks (investigate instancing).
And oh, a non modeling thing, you model in maya, you have a powerful virtual camera and you can take images with it, an unlimited amount. I should advise you to use it to compose your scene, make it more iteresting simply by putting the point of view somewhere else. As it was said before try the foreground-background thing, to add depth and interest.
good luck and courage, it will be getting better each time.
OK here it is please people wait for an update before posting any more comments than the last All you are doing is repeating what the last person has written (most of the time) now there are some really good comments here but when one person after another writes comment after comment its get a little bit stressfull now here is an update critisize away
This is a huge improvment now, I think what this needs now is a bit of ambient light to represent lighting from the sky and sea. The dark side of the hut is unnaturally dark.
Here is a small update don’t know If this makes it better but at least now you can see the cloth door to the hut that I actually modeled
No I think you have gone a step backwards here by over illuminating the scene with ambient lighting and killing your shadows again.
Here is a quick example of what I meant: -
You can see that the ambient lighting is very subtle and the stronger direct lighting casts shadows that give the contact between the water and the hut.
Did you actually model that ? just as an example for me ?? well even if you didn’t thanks for the tips I will work on it right now
Yep it was just a quicky I put together based on analytical objects. Good luck with your lighting tests, once your happy I would suggest taking a look at the walls and the roof of the hut, perhaps making them appear much more thatched. I certainly think its worth working through on this image there is a lot more you can learn from it.
Yeah I really need to work on the texture of the hut the hardest this is trying to find a good texture I really don’t want to use paint effects or fur effects so does anyone no of a good shader or even a good texture ?? thats the biggest problem it looks too much like clay that has been moulded into the shape of thatched straw
sorry I will help you on this one …(I think I am a rather poor texturer) but I will share some of my modest experience. That is to say, finding an average texture and modifying it so it fits your style is a good way to go if you have trouble doing your own texture/shader. But avoid using them with default setups, you should always add your touch (could be trying a parameter and going back to the default value by hand, not entering value, maya is full of sliders and tools to help you in that ( you can select a channel on the right hand list and modify the value by clicking on the viewport with interactive feedback)).
Then you should go by steps. Yeah I know you want to make a cool image quickly. But if you go through each logical steps you will see an improvement in your work. It is good to start with modeling and producing some images without any artifices, only the modeling and some lights to see something. Are you positively sure the model you have is the final one? It can be very tedious to work on materials if you have to transform the model during (or worst after) the texturing phase.
If it is then keep on texturing, but remember that your materials and textures depend on the modeling, modify the model and most of the time the materials and textures will have to be check or corrected, it can be a lot of time waste. try to plan ahead a bit.
Paint effect could be very nice, but doing it with textures will be more rewarding, paint effect brushes are so full of parameters, it is easy to use a lot of time and not succeed. Try first with textures.
You could try to make a bunch of transparent shapes, pile them up and acchive a some tricky thing. Okay, let think about it. How are the hut built, over there i think with some dead palms or somethink. You could model every bits. But you could also try some texture/modeling thing. I hope you can follow my idea for the roof (but I do not have access to maya now so ask for more precise informations):
-we will try the nurbs, as simple shapes are easier to texture than polygons
-leave the orginal roof there as a guide (make a new layer, move the model there and change the layer mode to reference ®)
-model a disk(2 circle nubrs lofted), -translate the splines together so they rest at the base of the orginal roof. -Translate and scale the splines to make the lofted surface mimick a small (~15%) part of the original roof. You could also build a nubrs cone with carefull creation parameters, but it is to be tried.
-Duplicate the surface 6 times so the surface overlap some (30-65%) and scale down going to the roof top.
- Find a simple palm texture or photo, look in visor
- Modify this image as much as you want but it as to be black and white showing only a palm leaf (the leaf general shape, white, the rest, black), we will use it as a mask
- create a new material (try phong).
- in the phong transparency add the palm mask by importing the b/w plm image file.
- in the phong color channel, add a 2d fractal, texture parameters are to numberous for me right now, but try to have a small pattern with colors matching dead palms (yellowish…)
- apply this texture to all the roof pieces
- modify the 2dtextureUV attributes so that you have a lot of repeats in the pattern and try some randomness
- bring back the orginal roof by unreferencies it’s layer
- apply phong to orignial roof.
- move the camera to have a closer look at the roof (optional remove shadows from lights)
- IPR test it. Okay, hum, you should see some patterns repeated on each disk that are partial transparent now. Combining those patterns together could make a cool quick “dead palm stacked” like roof.
- you should tweak the fractal pattern and colors (. Add bump, reverse specularity, modify the various 2dtextureUV parameter one at a time to see how they influence the genral view of the object (the mesh of the pattern must be fine enough to let some air and light pass, but dense enough to provide protection…)
Well you now have a lot of possibilities to improve this. Add more disks, modify each disk so that it isn’t flat and reacts to light in an intersting way. Use pieces of disks to simulate more layers of palms, a lot to tweak in the textures (layered textures, various masks, various UV coordinates through switches…), add some density to the models with displacement, tweak your rendering so that each palm produces it’s own shadow(raytracing), etc…
You could try this on the whole hut for a more “hairy” look. And later, with some deformers on the disks you could animate the palms reacting to wind or something…
This opacity use of masks is very frequent in cg as it helps use few polygons to produce complex shapes, flat but complex. It is used a lot in games (trees?), when you have to use real pictures for integration or look (architectural cg often have one poly characters), maya sprite particle types, and a lot of hair renderings.
good luck and keep the updates
p.s. write me an e-mail if you want more precise help
i need sleep…
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