You dont need crazy high values in your raytracing or arealight samples. like 13xbmspec said, its overkill. High values dont necessarily equate to better renders.
I attached a render using maya’s misss-fastsimple and default sized sphere done in maya2012 sp2. The default misss values were grainy, just like your candle. I dropped the diffuse weight to .375, the front and back sss radius down to 2, the shininess 15, the lightmap samples 512, and scale conversion down to .5
I believe the miss shaders take into account object scale so if your candle isn’t real-world size thats where the scale conversion helps out.
my arealights are only 1 intensity, the samples for the lightshape are 16,2,2 from top to bottom. my raytrace options are all default.
I know its still a touch grainy in the backscattering but its pretty close.