Scrap model that I made and no longer updated. I reverted back to an older version. There were a lot of errors with the anatomy and the hair was brutal, but this is a render I did of it.
details
title pending
Rhid1en
#3
technical aspects aside; however you do definately need to fix the hair, as you do keep in mind your character and what it is you’re trying to convey. Right now, it’s not reading as any definate feeling of emotion one way or another. It’s hard to tell if she’s in love, being touched by someone else, sad with her own hand to her head, has a head ache, soar tooth, or what? Try really pushing her expression for that which you had in mind and then we can talk more about making the lighting more dramatic to also help tell your story.
Pi3141
#4
In terms of emotion, Your characters head looks too straight, and takes away from the fact that her hand is supporting her head.
Her eyelids are closed as if in deep thought, but her neck is tensed up.
It seems to be contrasting in emotions at the moment.
projectcoil
#5
Originally posted by Pi3141
[B]In terms of emotion, Your characters head looks too straight, and takes away from the fact that her hand is supporting her head.[/B]
Great suggestion!
Her eyelids are closed as if in deep thought, but her neck is tensed up.
It seems to be contrasting in emotions at the moment.
Ya, I had problem with some morphs.
projectcoil
#6
Originally posted by Rhid1en
It’s hard to tell if she’s in love, being touched by someone else, sad with her own hand to her head, has a head ache, soar tooth, or what?
Actually, that’s general vicinity I had in mind.
MarkSnoswell
#7
details, details … I know this is rough now, but in this pose, with the eyes closed you need to put more visual cues into the face. More for us to “read” her face. Wrinkles in the forhead and around the coreners of the eyes. SOme moisture and life to the skin. Texure … whateve. Basically a score of little things that a real living, breating and thinking girl would have.
In many ways an extreeme close up like this can be as hard as a technical piece to get right on the emotional and story level – as the average human viewer is just so good at reading faces!
Be very clear what it is your are trying to convey – as in writing, apply the KISS principle “Keep It Simple Stupid”. Know what the main thing you want to convey is and do every dammed thing you can to support that.
Snitch
#9
ya looks awsome, i seem to like the hair for some reason, maby its just me :S, also the lip stick on her lips seems to be put on to perfect, its just one perfect line going above and below her lip, maby thats possible, just seems to stand out to me.
tjbeseda
#10
to me that hand seems to be someone elses. someone who she may love. but also she is tense. perhoas she is nervous or afraid as well as deeply touched. im not sure. there is a bit of conflict here…and the hair, lol, u gotta fix it. but i do like the general idea.
Annuostivix
#11
hm, if this wasnt in a forum for helping people with the emotion side of things, I’d say everyhting was looking ok except for the hair. But when I really look at it, I agree with the suggestion that this could be someone elses hand. The hair of course, you know how that is. But if you made it limp when you were done, it would add to an effect suggesting she was worn out or hurting. Actually… all in all, I would like to see limper hair. But for now I like it a lot, the idea is good. I can’t help a lot aside from that, so good luck 
A_Makkai
#12
Technically:
The hair is to thick, and don’t shadow the face. Ther’s no ore very little texture in the skin. The eye brows grow down instead of an arced up-side. The I lashes grow all over the place. The Lipstick edge is to sharp.
As fore the pose:
The hand is a right hand, coming from her right side, making it impossible to be anyones els es hand. (unless there standing behind her, which wold then make it a small Houdini act.) Maybe lover the hand, tilt it up and tilt her head in to it. The center of wight shod be over the lover palm. Try the pose out and you’ll get the point. Work with the face more. Get some facial expression other the real doll look.
Emotionally:
Its just a portray. You’ll see billions of these every day. CG has a lot more to offer. This image would do a lot better as a photography, were its a lot easier to get the suptile emotions. But if getting close to it is your challenge (and its a fair one) Give it some background. Leave more space in front, ore behind the face. Its centered in frame making it a boring composition.
Aron Makkai
Garma
#13
Originally posted by A_Makkai
Its just a portray. You’ll see billions of these every day. CG has a lot more to offer. [/B]
I’m sorry I certainly have to disagree here. In exposé 1 are a couple very good examples of portraits that have a lot of emotions in them. It’s just very hard to create those emotions.
For the image, the technical matters destroy the overall feel a little. Fix the lips (look like plastic - sorry :/) and the hair (too thick and it goes through the nose).
after that, consider these suggestions:
You want her to be in love and dumped right? That’s what I make up about your reaction.
- close her mouth
- bow her head down a little
- fix the arm, rotate it more towards her body.
- consider giving her other colors on her lips and her hair. This way she looks bitchy, which conflicts with the overall feel you want.
- post processing in photoshop
Try opening her eyes a little, maybe you can get her gazing at some point in infinity.
good luck
mjb2
#14
the eyebrows and eyelashes are thin and wirery, making it hard for me to really take in the emotion of the expression. The super close-up only makes that aspect of her face more obvious.
projectcoil
#15
Originally posted by A_Makkai
Its just a portray. You’ll see billions of these every day.
Got to hate it when people have nothing better to say but to make comments to belittle your work. Continue to lower the morality of this world and the bleaker life will get.
A_Makkai
#16
Originally posted by projectcoil
Got to hate it .
Stop spreading your hate, the world is full of it anyway. Instead concentrate on the rest of the post.
Sorry if I offended you. That was never my intension. Maybe you wanted some feedback on you image, since you sent it to this forum.
And my opinion is that CG portrays of girls rarely are evocative at all. Often my only emotion is: This medium is so misused.
Is it impossible do discus the topic of this forum, without offending people? Maybe this is the wrong forum for me? It seemed a lot better then the other ones with ten head banging smilies as a reply to some lower end CG. But I have lots of better things to do then unintentionally offending people.
Aron
projectcoil
#17
There was nothing in your post that others have not said or I have not mentioned. If you had taken the time to read the entire thread before joining the discussion than you would have clearly seen the hair, the hand, and the texturing had already been stated. Since you don’t like looking at portraits of woman, I can’t really count your opinions having any weight at all.
Other than that, some people are just piss off bloody offensive.
leigh
#18
Hey guys, please keep personal sentiments regarding users (and not art) out of this thread.
Thanks!
MarkSnoswell
#19
First and last warning … any comments that are more personal then constructivly critical must be emailed personally.
Projectcoil – cool it.
General free advice to everyone:
You give a talk, show a picture, or write something that reaches 1,000 people say. 990 people are happy, agree and don’t say anything, 9 people bother to say the liked it – and yet you get all tied up over the one negative comment you do get. Now how stupid is that? … you’r spending all this emotional energy and focusing on this small minority.
This is something I learned in a Career Track seminar on Stress Management. – so just chill and dont loose perspective. … especially with art … Diferent people, differnet opinions and perspectives.