Steampunk Myths and Legends Entry: Cory Jespersen

#41

Not a big fan of the composition, to be honest with you. The foreground figure is very obstructive and limiting the way in which the eye can travel through your painting. It seems these foreground elements are very much a ‘thing’ with you, having looked through your cgportfolio (which I loved by the way). But in this case I think perhaps moving the figure to be sat on the car to the right or changing the aspect to a more panoramic vista will help.

I don’t mean this to sound scathing, just constructive. Hope you find it helpful.

#42

Marcus
As an artist and designer we live in a subjective world. As an artist you have to pick and choose what subjective comments are valid in making improvements and I’m just not feeling it from yours to be honest. Thanks for the feedback

#43

I reworked the tail on the scorpion. It felt to modern so I gave it more of a true steampunk feel. I’m also zooming in on the scorpion and really creating the details that will polish off the art. This step also takes a lot of time. Enjoy and let me know what you think. Thanks

#44

Love this concept, looking forward to seeing how you approach the finish/polish.

#45

Excellent work. It has a strong sence of depth,feel of the atmosphere and mood.
I also agree about the pose of the character, a dynamic pose could really make it stand out.
Seeing this image reminded me of the Goliath myth.
Keep it up wildcory:thumbsup:

#46

Love the composition and the texturing.
Just maybe to bend a tail of scorpion a little more, so it looked more aggressive. Just some thoughts.
Great work. :thumbsup:

#47

The concept work is really giving epic dimensions to the creature from this impressing story.
I really like the perspective, it gives so much power to the composition! keep it coming great Cory :slight_smile:

#48

interesting choices
looking forward to seeing more

#49

Hey cory thanks 4 ur post man. I got 2 tell u I been loving ur piece and the concept behind it. I like ur style as well; very refreshing. I’m enjoying your process and progress. Looking 4ward to ur next move :wink: all the very best 2 u

#50

The over all response was that Orion needed to have is bow drawn. I revised him so that he had more action with his bow drawn. I then got a response that this could be a david and goliath story with a young boy throwing a rock at the steampunk scorpion being goliath. The nice thing about the boy is that he lightens the mood and gives a nice twist to my normal run and gun kind of stories. Let me know what you think.

#51

So i changed the character to a little boy. He brings a fun and not serious mood to the illustration. I have also changed my story to David and Goliath. I also made some changes to the tail of the steampunk scorpion. I added a polly system at the back of his tail and made it more steampunk. I also changed the steam exhaust on the back. The old exhaust looked like a tuba. Let me know what you think.

#52

Awesome, I really like your painting style. The colours are great. It looks a bit like David is calling 911 on his cellphone, though. Maybe he could extend his arm a bit more? Or have one of those Y-shaped slingshots?

#53

Looking good! I also like the kid best. What about have the red light in the dome be a laser scanning the kid, just an idea…
Cheerzzz

#54

Hey Cory once again, great stuff. The piece does feel better with th child and I love the rework of the scorpion. Keep it up. Oh and I must say the environment is quite a beauty fot this scenario :wink:

#55

I love your style. what kinda brushes do you like to work with? it looks like oils? really nice.

#56

The boy looks very nice, but I agree with Minnhagen, it doesn’t seem he is going to fight.
Love your style :slight_smile:

#57

hey bro! :stuck_out_tongue: this is surely one of my favs! :love: lots of detail n a cool painterly treatment! … as CuriousLobster and Minnhagen pointed out … i searched a bit on david and goliath … i think you can do better with the pose and dynamism and actually prepare him for a good fight :scream: …

http://hdbizblog.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/05/david_and_goliath.jpg

there were many other references but this one seemed to convey the message right through

… " come and get some " :smiley: :smiley: :smiley:

#58

The kid is definitely a nice touch, but I also agree with Minnhagen. Nice work :slight_smile:

#59

Glad to see you aboard Cory. Haven’t seen you in previous contests so welcome back. I like what I am seeing. Good luck.

#60

Hello Bryce
It’s good to see you as well. Your portfolio looks amazing.