Spectacular 2D Entry: sara black

#5

yeah, i was wondering about the composition…

but i did want it to be kind of a quiet feeling…hmm
ill play around with other views and such…

any suggestions?

takk!
shramír
:scream:

#6

Hi there, great concept, I think if you show this not from the top but from the side, and gave a little distans, that would help,
like maybe at the third on the right is that bed with the woman on it and right above those huge screens, bunch of cables hanging out, and people in white coats hanging around,
jut the thought,
good luck :thumbsup:

I don’t think I like somebody knowing what’s going in my head, that’s spooky :scream:

#7

yes i did plan on adding a whole bunch of cables to the back of the monitors and what not in the line art,
but ill definitely try those other angles. :wip:

…i dont know what the hammer guy means but i thought it was cute

thanks!
shramír

#8

:wip: that one means the wiping that you need, i t’s great concept, yeah it need’s a little workI 'nt doing that work on this, I know I’m a bit pushy, but I just love the idea,
like Coma I know it’s old but that creepy feel, oh man, just go for it :applause: :applause: :applause:

#9

are you working on this or what???
just thought came to me, you know that video by PJ (pearl jam)
Evolution,when the dude is pluged to the computer
I just thinkyou could use as a refference,
sorry to bug you, just the idea
peace :twisted:

#10

yes yes im working on it!!

unfortunately im sooo busy at the moment, i just moved out of the house ive lived in for 20 years, i just got back from being in iceland for a month, and im finalizing everything to go back to school while trying to find a place to live while im finishing school AND i just flew back from florida yesterday to get my things and then drive back down to FL to go to school. :eek: :eek: :eek:

but i did draw some really quick sketches of different angles that i like, im gonna post them soon but i have to warn you they are really rough…i mean like rough as in theyd mug you if you ran into them in a dark alley at night. :stuck_out_tongue:

ill try to get them up tonight or tomorrow, but thanks for the encouragement, its really…encouraging…hahaha!!!

takk takk!!
shramír :scream:

#11

this is another angle i did as suggested by you nice guys…

i have a couple other ones but i like this one the most…again i wanted it to be a quiet feeling, so i didnt want to put other people in the scene…but i like this angle. i really liked the first concept, but the biggest critique i got was about the composition so i tried to think up a better angle that would still evoke the feeling that i was aiming for.

let me know what you think!

shramír

#12

hey, just hang here,
I did not have much time either, my son got really sick, and I 'm like a zombie but oh well so did a little sketch foryouu, so you can see what I mean
and how the hell did you find my old drawing, but Thank you, I thought they would remove this by now

bad.jpg
not sure if this works but if it doesn’t I think you need to pull the camera out, back have the b ad on the left with same strong highlights, and very dark on the left, with just the cables so that would be just few lines, very thin, but visable, with the little shine to itthe position now is perfect, but you need to move out back
but the new position it’ right on, love it just open the whole thig up a bit
and hey,Thank you :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

#13

This new layout opens up better possibilities for the pictures on the monitors, but it also is less intimacy “* uh oh… typing problems *”

Previous one had better feeling of the girl it didnt make her distant…

Personally i dont think there is anything spectacular in seeing a dead girl. So maybe just keep her alive. And draw her family behind the wall of glass… being happy that she is about to wake up from coma or something and the monitors show her dreams or something like that.

Anyway it is really upto you. Good luck! :slight_smile:

#14

her pose doesn’t say post-mortum to me… it’s too natural. I would imagine this tech would be used at the crime lab, not at the murder site… so she’d probably be more deliberately laid out.

#15

yeah, i agree that you lose intimacy with the newer angle, but the picture really isnt supposed to concentrate on the fact that she is dead. i just thought if i was watching discovery channel or something like that and they had a show about some new technology that could open up peoples minds and show you their memories and thoughts, i would think that was a really spectacular thing.
so i guess its more like she was killed, but there is a new hope for her family and friends because now we´ll be able to bring them some peace in knowing that the person who did her wrong will pay for it, and they can see that she was happy and full of good memories.

my friend suggested that i make the screens very big, and have them in the BG like this new technology stuff was on display, and maybe have a few people in the backround (like a few scientists, maybe some detectives) taking notes from the images and things like that…im going to sketch that and put it up…

thank you all for your comments and critiques, its great to see what everyone thinks!
thanks again!

bless bless
shramír :scream:

#16

yes i thought about that… but i was thinking that maybe it would be a little boring to have her just laying out? ill try that and see how it looks though and you can tell me if you think that is better :slight_smile:

i just wanted her to look beautiful even though shes not alive so i stuck her in that pretty pose… :wink:

okay!

ill get to work!
shramír :cool:

#17

I don’t think you have to sacrifice beauty even if you change the pose. Personally I’d have her laid out so that her head was close to the “camera” and her feet pointing toward the screen (unfortunatley this would put her “upside down” in the frame. With the face up close like that, you’d be able to concentrate on her facial features and really pull out phsyical beauty.

As is, she just looks like she’s sleeping. In fact my intial reaction to the concept sketch was that she was in some futuristic psyche ward, and she was remembering abuse, not murder.

#18

really thats what you thought?

hmm, ok…i had thought about flipping her around as well, but it drives me crazy for some reason… rrragghh…
:banghead:

haha

ill try to think up a different place to put her…

again, thanks a lot everyone has been so helpful!!

takk takk
shramír

#19

I agree with Lord Dubu…
Also, your concept really reminds me alot of the film “The final Cut” with Robin Williams…It’s really sad…if you haven’t seen it, go rent it…same concept for the most part.

#20

hmm, havent heard of that one…
i love one hour photo, robin wiliams is awesome

anyway, im working on finding a good place to put her in the picture…
should be done soon…ill put it up when it is (obviously… haha)

shramír

#21

:thumbsup: Hi Shramír…

i like your concept a lot and like the viewpoint / angle of the latest drawing. I can also see what people mean about being closer to the head. I suppose that you could have a view from the side of the bed with the camera tilted so as to get more of her body in shot (so still looking up towards her from feet end of the bed, but to one side and slightly closer to her head, so you can get some of the monitors in the foreground - which would also add depth).

Good luck and keep the great images coming!!

:applause:

#22

awesome, thanks so much for the wonderful critique! i have some new ideas for angles and such…wont be able to post for a day or 2 though, im moving tomorrow morning…:cry:

until then
just try to imagine the new sketch…hahaha

thanks again
shramír :applause:

#23

hey just came to see whats up,
keep working on this, do it how ever you want it’s yours,
it’s great idea with the potential, don’t give up
cheers :wip:

#24

whooo
well ive been really busy with school so i havent worked on my thingy much… :sad:
hopefully now that i have my computer completely up and going at home ill be able to work on it more.
i havent given up!!! im still in this thing!
WHOO!

thank you to everyone who has helped me, given me encouragement, or has just dropped by to see whats up.
:beer:

keep working hard everybody!
bless bless
shramír