I need some feedback and suggestion for my short animation please. It’s gonna last about 3 min Here is the idea
ll call him Timmy for simplicity reasons.
Timmy has joined army - air force to be precise. But he never wanted to be there his parents made him to do so. His father , grandfather all were pilots . This is sort of the family tradition.
Timmy is a small person, so small that all clothes that he was given are too big for him. Especially the helmet that keeps falling of.
To make things worse Timmy has fear of the height. And now for the first time in his life Timmy is about to jump out from the plane with parachute.
Wide angle of the plane passing by. Its an old plane, probably from the First World War. Makes a lot of noise.
Inside of the plane. Camera pans from left to right showing paratroopers. One by one. You see expressions on their faces. Tense and focused. Camera pauses on the last one.
This is the main character. He looks really terrified.
He also is quite small comparing to others , and you can straight away tell that this is not the right place for him to be.
I want to make him to do all sorts of thing to show that he is really scared. He prays to the god, wipes the sweat from his forehead, looks around with the terrified expression on his face. and so on.
And then comes the time when paratroopers start to jump out from the plane.
Sergeant calls them one by one and they jump out without hesitation. I still dont know how this procedure really looks like ( when paratroopers jump out from the plane.) I need to find out.
Time comes when our hero should be next. The captain shouts on him . He pretends that he doesnt hear. As if he wasnt there. The captain shouts again louder. Main character looks around, looks behind him, then at the captain. He points at himself as if he was asking if this is really about him.
Well Ok, he says with the body language. Takes deep breath, gets up and like small child that has to do what he doesnt want to slowly comes up to the hatch.
He look through the opening.
Ext. Low angle
We see the main character from the outside of the plane, he looks through the hatch.
He holds to the sides of the hatch so not to fall down. Terrified, wind is blawing his clothes. Noise from the plane and the wind. Eyes are almost popping out from its orbits. Mouth open.
After few seconds he quickly comes back inside. He clings to the wall. His breathis really fast.
He looks at the hatch, then at the captain, then at the hatch again. Oh, no Im not going in there. (body language again)
Captain shouts at him . Close up of his face (terrified). Captain shouts at him again.
He takes deep breath , makea sing of cross, closes his eyes and jumps.
Our hero in the air. Eyes tight closed. Fists clenched. Few second passes before he has enough courage to open eyes.
I havent figured out what will happen next but I was thinking that it turn out that he really enjoys flying.
I would be greatfull for any suggestions how to end the story, name for the main character ,suggestions Any comments and critic welcome