MSWC #2: The Road to Nowhere

#21

ah yes :smiley: now I have to reply again :slight_smile:

That hypocrite thing was jokingly, you can really think and say what you want, I donā€™t mind, I have a very hard skin for those kind of thingsā€¦ I live in Holland, land of freedom, legalized drugs, prostitution, abortion and euthanasia. So I can take measly religion disputes :smiley:

So again see my opinions merely as warnings for future misnomers and communication faultsā€¦ thatā€™s why I called it my opinions in the first place.

But enough of all that. I guess we are voting now so my vote goes tooā€¦

Kevin Hill AKA AllWritey for me he scores points by trying to do something different. The endings of both Serum and Kadetkebab left me cold and kinda lost so those are the most important points for me, and what I base my vote on. But it is a very close call, not everything perfect but all kinda the same league.

Cheers!

#22

Hi guys,

First off Iā€™d like to thank Matsman for PMing me. I have CGTalk set to to send me emails when there are replies to my subscribed threads. Somehow I didnā€™t see an email for this one. Also, I apologize for my rushed entry. Normally, I write something in one sitting and let it sit for a month before coming back to it to rework it. In this case, I saw this thread on May 27, the deadline was May 28, and I had a long shift at work coming up so I just went for it and posted what I had.

Thanks for your crits, they have been very helpful.

Allwritety - I love your descriptions. They are very detailed and I can picture the situation very well. Some of the dialogue sounds like Jones was going through a thesaurus though (wench, hussy, harlot, whore), and the transition from drama to comedy was a little weird . I think it would have worked better if there were more funny lines in the beginning to give it that comic feel throughout.

kadetkebab - Great descriptions, nice ending, and I liked the dialogue. The one part that seemed stilted to me was the part where the man cries and asks why God made him that way. That seemed a little too sudden for me, unless he is supposed to be like that, an unstable personality with wild behavior swings.

matsman - Again, great descriptions. I think my script was probably the most sparse when it came to descriptions. I found it interesting that the killer was the talker in your story. In my story, I had him more as the silent type. The part where he turned out to be an angel was cool in that it was unexpected, but somehow it didnā€™t mesh with the earlier talk about reincarnation with me, but maybe thatā€™s just me. Also, I found it odd that he killed the hunters with his ā€œpowersā€, but he killed the girl with a gun.

Thanks guys, I think this is a great idea. You seem like a nice group, and I really enjoyed this contest. Sorry for the delayed participation on my part. I was sort of holding back to see how you guys were going to judge this, and then I moved on to some other things and forgot about this thread till I saw the PM.

Serum

#23

Hey Guys

Well, thanks for the crit serum. good to hear from you. So now I suppose itā€™s pretty much up to Allwritety now to get the other thread going. but no rush mate. when you get around to posting your concepts or ideas since I know most of us are pretty much tied up with work as well.

hey matsman: i was meaning to ask you if you are still continuing that thread on your screenwriting course. I see you havent added anything so far and I know youā€™ve been tied up with this thread and work. so just wanted to know if you were done there or not mate. cheers.

well this was fun. hope we do more.

#24

Yeahā€¦ sorry been a bit busy latelyā€¦ but I am anxious to get going againā€¦ past half year was kinda busy with work, and I did a master course on serious game design which took up more free time than I had originally intended. Dnd is still ongoing, but I have worked about two play sessions in advance, so that is okay. Had some reports to finish in order to get some funding, and I competed in the uplift universe challenge in order to get a XSI student licence for free :slight_smile: ā€¦ as I said itā€™s been busy.

But I have still some stuff that needs to be said and I have also promised to get my notes from the GDC (that was in February :eek: )fleshed out hereā€¦ so that will be my primary goal somewhere this weekend.
And I want to finish the story of course. That is important too. But good that you bring it up I will try to be somewhat more productive coming months :slight_smile:

thanks for the support :thumbsup:

#25

Just a quick note the new thread should be up by the mid of next week.

Kev

#26

Oh, AllWritey, would you mind changing the rules in the new thread so that they say that the winner is decided by votes, the rest can be copied from the old threads I think.
Best to have it stated in the rules so everyone knows what they are getting themselves into, once we have 20 contestants :smiley:

Cheers!

#27

Hi Guys

MSWC # 3 is up.

I tried to do a fancy title but it didnā€™t come out right. SOZ . I guess i am better at writing than graphics eh?

Kev

#28

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