REAL WORLD:Relationships at work: Why is this a big NONO? What makes it Harrasment?

Become a member of the CGSociety

Connect, Share, and Learn with our Large Growing CG Art Community. It's Free!

THREAD CLOSED
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 12 December 2005   #1
REAL WORLD:Relationships at work: Why is this a big NONO? What makes it Harrasment?

A lot of our members are about to enter into the workforce,
and I thought this is a worthwhile topic.

Specially with the holiday parties coming.

A lot of companies have very STRONG fraternation rules, and
there is a GOOD reason for them,

So I post this question to the forum:

Why relationships AT WORK are a bad idea?
What are the consequences for the employer and the employee.

Looking forward to your comments.

-R
__________________
LW FREE MODELS:FOR REAL Home Anatomy Thread
FXWARS
:Daily Sketch Forum:HCR Modeling
This message does not reflect the opinions of the US Government

 
Old 12 December 2005   #2
Believe it or not, quite a few people do actually meet their life partner at work.

What one has to remember is that they keep the relationship seperate from work. Walking into work and snogging your partner infront of everyone else is plain stupid. Interacting with your partner like you would another employee is simply common sense.

When work is over - anything goes.

I personally go to work to get money - not a social life. Thats what my free time is for. However, if I met some gorgeous stunner at work and we got on with each other very well - we'd save it for afterwork.

Just use your brain.
__________________
Silo, 3D Coat, Blender
C, C++, Java

Currently working on...HCR #42
 
Old 12 December 2005   #3
I think it is ok if it is your boss or someone that can help you get a really good pay raise or advancement in the company. Also, if your company has an in-house day care, making a family could work because you can all carpool into work and eat lunch together. Then as your child grows older, you have the opportunity to take advantage of nepotism.
 
Old 12 December 2005   #4
Originally Posted by XLNT 3d: I think it is ok if it is your boss or someone that can help you get a really good pay raise or advancement in the company. Also, if you company has an in-house day care, making a family could work because you can all carpool into work lunch together.

LOL!


-R
__________________
LW FREE MODELS:FOR REAL Home Anatomy Thread
FXWARS
:Daily Sketch Forum:HCR Modeling
This message does not reflect the opinions of the US Government

 
Old 12 December 2005   #5
I dunno... my GF and I work at the same place... It does get a tad tough sometimes, because you get to see your partner ALL the time... we live together too. It's like anything, too much of a good thing can easilly turn to a bad thing...

And if/when you were to breakup, the idea of seeing your ex-partner with someone else can trigger pretty bad emotional responses in both parties... even the idea of being around them... the feeling that you can't escape is dominant because you know they're in the next room... it's harder to not think about them, which brings you to poor productivity.

There's WAY too many senarios to think of, but in the end, if you aren't careful or if you're just an emotionless psycho (which seems to be the case for alot of animators I know ) it's hard to be productive when all you can think of is making peace with that person that's no longer yours, but is in the other room, or worse, right in front of you every day.

Is the show getting done? That is the question. No one cares about your feelings. which is an entirely new argument
 
Old 12 December 2005   #6
At the studio I work two couples were hired (one married, one living together) and another programmer is being brought on who is already in a relationship with one of the artists. Haven't had any problems so far. Several of these folks had alot of experience already and it is a new and fairly small company which might help.
 
Old 12 December 2005   #7
Actually our company is pretty serious about it. If you have a spouse that also works here, then one of you have to quit. If you marry someone at my work, then one of you have to quit. If you marry someone that wants to work here, then YOU have to quit if you want them to get hired.
 
Old 12 December 2005   #8
Okay, so, every woman I've known in this industry gets hit on. A lot. To the point of discomfort. Making things hard for them in the workplace is uncool. I'm not saying don't try to ask co-workers out, I'm saying that if they aren't interested, take a hint. And quickly.

My ex has this problem. She is ridiculously hot, and into video games, so every guy she meets judges her solely based on her looks, instead of on her skills. She hates it, because nobody takes her seriously.
__________________
BREAK
 
Old 12 December 2005   #9
Ah, sometimes things happen... in my small experience, we both were smart enough to stop well before anything really started. To be honest between the 2 of us, conversations fell back to "work" more often than I cared for. Everything is cool, calm and we're back to bieng good friends. No worries!

The real NO-NO is for teachers who date students. I have seen that happen before, and it is very much a NO NO. So I repeat, for sanity, personal, proffestional, and possibly LEGAL reasons, dont date your students.

**Edit: I should also note that one of my former bosses has been known to let go of 1 half of a couple if he finds out they are dating. He is very much a no-relationships-in-the-office supervisor.
__________________
Mike Rhone
-VFX Artist-

Dust Rig - tutorial for Maya

Tonga the Fox - Free cartoony rig for Maya!

Last edited by MikeRhone : 12 December 2005 at 10:31 PM.
 
Old 12 December 2005   #10
[QUOTE]

The real NO-NO is for teachers who date students. I have seen that happen before, and it is very much a NO NO. So I repeat, for sanity, personal, proffestional, and possibly LEGAL reasons, dont date your students.
[QUOTE]

We got one of those in my studio The teacher isn't a teacher rigtnow though... so, is that ok? You should see them... a tiny Asia girl and a giant Dutchman... Treebeard we call him.

Last edited by jakiloblanco : 12 December 2005 at 10:46 PM.
 
Old 12 December 2005   #11
what is CGTalk's policy on dating other forum members?

Personally I am married and quite happy that my wife has nothing to do with this industry. She doesn't even like computers that much. Especially when I spend too much time on one.
 
Old 12 December 2005   #12
Jeez Robert you come up with the most amazing topics,... what's in that head of yours?

I guess if 60% of your waking life is spent at work (if you arnt a freelancer) then there is a good chance you will meet someone.

Ladies don't generally go for getting hit on but sometimes when you are in the general area alot together it can kind of click. You could be really stoic,..."No mixin with the enemy",... or you could go with the flow and try take into account your surroundings.

It happened to me twice while working in different companies, both times it ended badly. Funny thing tho,... each time I worked my nads off! I am not agressive by nature but emotional turmoil brings out the best and worst and I can get a huge ammount of work done. I rekon work is the best way to dodge disasters in life.

To be fair I think many of these relationships work out rather well for most people. I did work for one European company that had a silent rule about messing around with someones husband or wife,.... I though 'fair enough'. If you did that you got the turbo boot!

I don't find it fair to forbid relationships,... if people are happy they work better. I think if you are told on commencement about the rule then you decide for yourself.
__________________
The terminal velocity of individual particles is directly related to pink rabbits on a bank holiday.
Characters, Games, Toys

Last edited by Kanga : 12 December 2005 at 10:55 PM.
 
Old 12 December 2005   #13
Talking

Originally Posted by MikeRhone: The real NO-NO is for teachers who date students. I have seen that happen before, and it is very much a NO NO. So I repeat, for sanity, personal, proffestional, and possibly LEGAL reasons, dont date your students.


Too late for me. Have been dating my g/f who was my student for two weeks for about 17 months. I may note that I started dating her after she finished my course. She still was a student at the institution though.

I think that you have to note that if they are in the same class as teacher-student it is not such a good idea. You really have to draw the line in for this kind of things and not cross it. EVER!! May be hard, but you're not doing it coz you're being made to.
__________________
Catapulting Cavalry Commander

 
Old 12 December 2005   #14
Aint experienced it... but Back in my schooldays. In classes sat next to my gf. When we broke up after 9 months (the week after id bought her a 8 diamond white gold ring for chrimbo and she dumped me with the line "I dont find you attractive")

It was torture, talking to her made me feel aweful and I couldnt concentrate at all.

Its hell guys. Really don't hook up with people you have to work with.
__________________
MaiaGame.com Linkedin Twitter
 
Old 12 December 2005   #15
I don't see what the problem is. I work with my wife now and did at my last job.
 
Thread Closed share thread



Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
CGSociety
Society of Digital Artists
www.cgsociety.org

Powered by vBulletin
Copyright 2000 - 2006,
Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Minimize Ads
Forum Jump
Miscellaneous

All times are GMT. The time now is 01:04 PM.


Powered by vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.