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Old 05-04-2004, 01:49 AM   #1
flewp
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Character: Girl with rose

Okay, posted on the 2d WIP forum, but I really need to get some feedback regarding the emotion of the image, so I thought I'd post it here.




I'm thinking the first step might be to add more depth to the character. She looks really flat right now in places, especially the arms and face.

I was also thinking of a different background too, possibly a mountainous type of landscape.

Also, I will be touching up various parts and cleaning up parts of the girl (fingers/hand, adding another rose or two, fixing parts of the hair)
 
Old 05-04-2004, 08:09 AM   #2
Peter Ryskin
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Hi Flewp,

I really like what you have going there - its a subtle picture, but there's soo much that can be read into it.

As I read your picture, the girl is standing a little turned with her left shoulder turned outwards towards the viewer, but in a somewhat relaxed pose. This lends the idea that she's guarding the rose.

If you look at her lower lip, the highlights you got going suggests rather full lips - yet they're slightly skewed as if she's almost biting it. Thats what the outline suggests to me, anyhow, but the coloration doesn't support it fully.

Hey eyes, coupled with the slant of her head, suggests that she's not looking directly at the viewer, but somewhere in the region of mouth/chin - where people tend to rest their gaze when their attention is drifting away, but still wishes to "acknowledge" the, well in this case, the viewer - Or if not wanting to challenge the viewer by direct eye-contact.

The satin on her shirt, well, err - I'd suggest getting a female friend to pose in some equivalent outfit - and to take a series of reference photo's, to get a grip on the way it behaves. There was an excellent writeup somewhere, that I found off a link to one of the regular's site - I think I went there to look for caustics, but I digress.

I think you've used the Depth of Field to great effect - there's no doubt she's in the focus - slightly loosing focus as you progress deeper into the background. The Pines on the left needs some work to bring their outline into , hah, line, with the rest of the work - as it is, they're a detriment (technically), but they're definately needed to bring the piece into balance.

The single rose is a strong symbol to use - Personally I'd stick with that, there are soo many opportunities to "get" the viewer that you don't have with several - since running around with the entire flowershop have fewer implications and, tada, symbolic meanings than the single one. Given where you may want to take the picture, I'd consider maybe adding a sparse handfull of petal's strewn in the lake behind her.

Apart from the pines, I'd suggest not doing any more detail work on the background - maybe the hill-top on the right, but keeping the blur. As it is, the edge on the other side of the lake is rather detailed - which means an increase of details would demand a huge jump in details on the girl to get the fluent graduation.

I really like the work, lots of possibilities there.
 
Old 05-04-2004, 01:06 PM   #3
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I'm not going to comment too much on technicalities, that is what the WIP forum is for

She looks to me like someone who has a lost love/missed the one's she in love with. The way she holds she rose she more looks like her love isn't coming back anymore...

The figure is really strong from an evocative point of view, but the composition and background distract, there is loads of room for the landscape and she looks a bit like she's pressed in the corner, composition-wise.

I would keep the background simpler and give her more room on the picture, hereby emphasing the rose/her face.

Hope this helps ^^)
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Old 05-04-2004, 08:19 PM   #4
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As for her "expression" (the angle of her eyes, slight tilt of head), well, I wanted to try and convey a sort of distant, detached feeling to her. Almost as if she's thinking deeply, but somewhat detached from the current moment.

" but the coloration doesn't support it fully. " Not sure what you mean by this. I assume you mean if she was biting her lip the color of the lips would be different? How so? I'm pretty new to drawing figures (well, in color anyway) so I'm looking for any and all help.


Yeah, the pine trees bothered me as well. Might drop them all together but I think I'll work on them first before just removing them outright.

The sky in the current pic is pretty standard right now, just kind of a backdrop so it wasn't plain white.
 
Old 05-04-2004, 10:17 PM   #5
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Trying to go for a more cool-grey type of sky, which I'm still tweaking at the moment.

Next up I'll be finishing her completely.
 
Old 05-06-2004, 01:01 AM   #6
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Okay, sorry for another small minor change, but I'd like to know if the greyer sky is working.

Basically, I kind of wanted to go with a greyer sky to coincide with the girl's somewhat detached, almost cold feeling.

Also, I think I might work more with some wispier clouds rather than the fluffy ones I have here.

 
Old 05-21-2004, 06:09 AM   #7
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To strengthen the 'wistfulness' or 'seductivness' or whatever expression you want her to have the eyes probably need a lot more details... Since this is the key thing that'll convey the emotion
 
Old 01-18-2006, 05:00 AM   #8
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