is this finished?

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Old 10 October 2012   #1
is this finished?

hey all you master of art ;-)
I always make stuff and think it "good", then i come here and have a look it the gallery and see that mine is far from finished...
so this time i set out to keep working until i didn't know what to do to improve it (unless starting over from scratch)
so i got to ask...
is this one finished in your opinions? what could i do more to better it?
and if finished what kind of quality level did i reach here? (as i always assume it's not nearly high enough to try getting it in the Gallery)

please be harsh and honest ;-)


 
Old 10 October 2012   #2
hmm not much critique. is this to little to go on?
 
Old 11 November 2012   #3
What are you trying to convey? To me this image seems to be missing a story or a concept. The flat white background is not helping that. From a purely aesthetic point of view I find the DOF a little off. Also, the shadows on the bottom half of the statue are very hard. I like the texture though, it looks like you put a lot of work in that.
 
Old 11 November 2012   #4
Yea, its tough to get away with a white object on a white background. You may want to darken your background.

I would just turn off the DOF. You couldn't get that kind of blur from that distance with a 1.2 prime, or even with a macro lens.

It might help to move your camera further away.

The regular 3D WIP thread gets more traffic, so you might have luck posting there.

-AJ
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Old 11 November 2012   #5
Style reminds me of "The Eagleman Stag" short film. Maybe looking at that will help you strengthen/challenge this look you have chosen. Also your sharp shadows on your words seem to not match the softer shadows on the rest of the piece. Good luck to you.
 
Old 11 November 2012   #6
aside from the advice above I feel this could really be improved with more dramatic lighting and a good shader. The bust would also benefit from a decent weathered bump map.

the depth of field has to go.... just because you can dosn't mean you have to.
 
Old 11 November 2012   #7
thanks for the critiques.

the white on white was to give it an over clean look, almost a dreamy, hopeful futuristic feel.
i was thinking about how we always belief the future is going to be better while most people say the past was better... if that makes any sense :-) hence the text.

so also the dof in the second one is still too much? was thinking of a 50 mm/1.8f lens


any suggestions as for the background?
i will try the worn out bump.
 
Old 11 November 2012   #8
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