Here's the first draft so to speak...
And here's where I've gotten the piece so far...
I'm just looking for general critique, though please, don't be afraid to be harsh with me. I'd prefer that you people be blunt and honest. If you think I should leave it as is, or continue to work with something in it then speak up ya. If you can, drop hints, explain techniques or link me to anything that may help me, even a little.