View Full Version : critique please

05 May 2006, 03:23 PM
Hi everyone! I was playing around with this and was wondering if anyone has any comments. I've been looking at it for too long, need fresh input. I havent used any reference, and I'm afraid it shows, but your comments will help! Thanks in advance! It's a work in progress, and I'll certainly be adding to it.

sorry about posting it on photobucket - no personal webspace


05 May 2006, 09:51 PM
Looks good. The motion is a little stiff, the first part where the gorilla moves over to the chairs is a little funky. I can't really tell where - the motion is too fast and I can't figure out how to make flash let me scrub the timeline. Possibly move the hips/center-of-gravity up and down more? It also looks as if the posing is off - there are a few frames where it looks as if the gorilla would fall over, and something odd is going on with the elbows.:surprised

The jumps are a little too static timing-wise. What I mean is, the feet and hands land at the same time, the head and hips bounce up and down at the same time, etc. Break it up a bit, and use the rule of thumb that the more massive body parts have the most difficulty starting and stopping. The end result is that I don't "feel" the weight of this supposedly massive gorilla (if the table and chair are to-scale). The posing is mostly good here, however.

Keep it up! Looking forward to updates...

05 May 2006, 09:34 AM
interesting...but I agree mostly with cmccad. Overall it needs more 'weight'. The animal is big...especially in the chest, however he moves like a praying mantis...very light on his feet. Maybe that's what you're going for, but it's not natural for suge a large creature. Maybe some more side to side movement. It's mostly vertical now. And I especially agree that the timing on the jumps could be made more interesting. Offset the timing of the hands/feet....maybe make him arch his back during the jump, etc.

Looking good!

05 May 2006, 01:02 PM
Thanks very much for comments!

cmccad: about the run - I know it's got issues, and I actually addressed the biggest one. He lurged forward too fast at one point. I'll go over the timing when the animation is somewhat finished.

skyboysky: I didnt mean for this monkey to be a huge one, but more weight couldnt hurt. Thanks for the observation!

Anyways, here's a little update:

I tweaked the part where he runs up to the table in the beginning (original was a little jerky, as cmccad mentioned), and added a couple of seconds of animation. I think I'll get to the end of the animation before fixing major issues. If I concentrate on fixing mistakes, I'll never finish this.

05 May 2006, 01:52 PM
A small update.

I've only added 1 second, but it was difficult work :) I'd like to hear suggestions as to where the monkey should turn next - continue with counterclock-wise spinning, reverse direction of spin or switch to something else rather than spinning. If I continue with counterclockwise, he'll get farther from the table, and that'll add seconds to animation. Thanks in advance for comments and suggestions!


05 May 2006, 06:27 PM
Much much better! :) The jump still bugs me where the left and right feet/hands land at the same time, but you said you would adjust the timing later so I'll leave it at that. There's still something awkward about the walk/run over to the chair, but I can't put my finger on it.

I really like the little spin at the end. Good stuff! :applause: I'm not sure what he will be doing after he spins, so I don't know what would fit in. :shrug: I don't think there should be another spin, the poor guy would get dizzy.

If you are looking for suggestions about how the story should go from this point, when I first saw the clip I imagined the monkey moving off-screen for a second or so, and then the chair being thrown back on-screen. He would then chase it back on screen, throw the chair down, it would break, and he would be sad... kind of like "Luxo Jr."

If you're not looking for story suggestions, ignore the previous paragraph. :D

05 May 2006, 01:15 PM
Alright, I think I'm done with this. Here's a link:

The frame rate is really dropped at Photobucket, and it hurts the animation a little, but being that I have no other place to upload it to, it'll do for now. I've gone through the whole thing once more after finishing the animation, fixed a few little things, addressed your suggestions, added a couple of little touches. Please let me know what you think of it! Thanks!


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