01 January 2005, 08:47 PM
For the second panel I suggest you remove the beams on the far left and right, and just black out the window area. As for rendering the windows, you could try showing a very faint background through them.
More importantly though, you need to draw outside the panels, and draw things that can't be seen. The characters heads look cut off, because I have the feeling that all you drew is what we see now. I don't mean we should see the whole heads, but I'm saying it would look more natural if you drew them out, then cut out parts that stuck outside of the panel. Secondly, there is no way that car could have a front tire similar in size to the back tire, and still have it hidden behind that guys feet. If you drew the entire car, and the people seperately, and then composited them, you wouldn't have this problem.
Now as for staging and composition:
For the car scene I would move the car down, slightly (more) behind the street, to give it a rounded hill effect. The same thing can be done with the people, except since they're in the foreground they'd go down and in front of the street. Also varying the street would help, right now its very flat and boring.
For the second panel, I don't understand the gesture that the man on the left is doing.
EDIT: I was thinking, the thing that bothers me about the first panel is that the horizon is too low, its almost as if they're walking on the panel border. Instead of my last comment, I would move everything up, and move the people slightly down so theyre in front of the street.
01 January 2005, 09:48 PM
I agree with Symbiont about the window/wheel issue in panel 1 -- the car's window cuts downward too sharply. As for a highlight, determine how flat or curved the window is. A flatter window will have a "taller" highlight from top to bottom, while a curved window will have a thin one. Use a lighter shade of gray depending on how bright the sun is.
BTW, that's an awful lot of brown you're using. :)
01 January 2005, 11:43 PM
the thing that caught me was the sharp corner on the woman's leg muscle...the name of it is escaping me right now...??? good job so far though!
that damn kid
01 January 2005, 01:39 AM
well here it is finished kinda....thanks for all the comments, i'll try to work in those changes as best i can...and yeah i should stop drawing cut off people and actually draw them out completely and then cut them off, or they'll look really goofy...as for the guy on the left, i tried to get him to look as if he's reaching for something in his coat hahahahaah right now it looks as if he's coming onto his friend there on the right, but his friend won't have anything to do with it:D ...i guess it'll make more sence when the rest of this page is done up...stay tuned
01 January 2006, 09:00 AM
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