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smurph
07-02-2011, 11:53 PM
http://img839.imageshack.us/img839/4083/bismark06.jpghttp://imageshack.us]ImageShack.us[/URL]http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/824/bismark06.jpg/

Both the ships will stay where they are but I'm trying to finalize everything on the left side. Any feedback is appreciated but mostly I'm concerned about whether the composition is working. Also, do the buildings on the left seem pasted in.http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/824/bismark06.jpg/

tide78
07-04-2011, 04:01 AM
Hey man, this is a cool idea so far, and it's looking nice, but I have a couple of comments for you if you don't mind.

1. The buildings on the left look pasted in, and it's for a couple of reasons imo, first being that the perspective works for the building furthest back, but for the foreground building, it's just feeling odd compared to everything else in the shot, like it's cluttering up your lines, plus it's not getting a light source like the ships are.

2. The ships and buildings all have some different terrain around them like each one has its own little ecosystem there... you might want to go back in and sort of unify one sort of terrain, add rocks and stuff, but whole areas tend to have the same sort of scrub and brush around them usually.

3. Your composition as is, could use some more thought. The lines all draw my eye back to the small open space between the ships, but then there's nothing else really there, I'd experiment with opening that space up and maybe having something of interest back there, as well as some objects or features in the foreground and midground that help make it more interesting. It just feels really claustrophobic in there right now with the ships closing in and having the focal point be so small with no real visual payoff if that makes sense. Also, I'm liking the thought of having a town, dump, retrofitted outpost along the outskirts of the ships, like there's a colony there that is harvesting the ships for parts and such to build stuff or whatever, I just think that you have plenty more room there to create depth, the buildings you have in there now make the ships feel out of scale.

4. You could still add in some depth there and some dust/atmosphere, if it's a barren land without any water, the wind is gonna be kickin up dust.

I like it though man, hopefully those comments are helpful.

smurph
07-04-2011, 07:11 PM
Thanks so much for your reply Zach, you have given me some things to think about. I think the biggest issue is just deciding what the focal point is going to be in the picture. I will play around with the placement of the ships and see if I can create the space for it. All the points you made were correct, thanks for taking the time!

KidBuu
07-06-2011, 01:30 PM
If its graveyard, there should be cranes and stuff like that. Also destroy the ships a little, this looks more like the ships crashed onto the beach rather than a graveyard. The left composition isnt going well, considering the ground of both ships look a litlle different. IMHO get rid of the cottages and instead fit in cranes and mechanical stuff.

smurph
07-06-2011, 06:41 PM
Thanks KidBuu! I like your suggestions, I'm reconsidering a few things at the moment like adding a couple more ships and maybe putting in a person to be the focal point. You also brought up the ground thing, I guess it's because it looks like sand around the foreground ship but dirt everywhere else.

KidBuu
07-07-2011, 08:36 AM
I think the problem with the cottages is the the ships are rendered at dynamic angles while the cottages are flat shot, (did you render them or are they images?). how about a single camera with set rotation for all 3 images?

smurph
07-07-2011, 07:53 PM
The sheds are from photos, ships are painted over models. I do think the foreground shed might be better at a slight angle, if it stays there.

smurph
07-12-2011, 06:26 AM
http://img10.imageshack.us/img10/7764/bismark11z.jpg

Here is the latest version. Any crits and comments are welcome. The idea has changed a bit, now it's more of a post apocalyptic scenario. I am still playing with composition. There will be more little shacks around the background ship, they will look more badly constructed and weathered than the existing one. I'm not sure about the foreground left element and whether it helps the composition.

smurph
07-26-2011, 02:14 AM
Here is the current wip on this thing. Feedback is appreciated.
http://img856.imageshack.us/img856/3562/bismark14.jpg

smurph
08-24-2011, 10:11 PM
I made some small fixes and now I'm calling this done. Any crits or comments are welcome.

http://img6.imageshack.us/img6/698/bismark15.jpg

Rockhoppermedia
08-26-2011, 02:26 PM
Wires on the bridge are very untidy/thick, also I would possibly turn the hue to blue slightly, remember in the desert there is a atmospheric haze which accentuates aerial perspective.

Hope that helps

Rich

smurph
08-27-2011, 04:37 AM
Thanks Rich, let me look into those issues, especially the wires.

KidBuu
09-23-2011, 08:03 AM
This one looks way awesome!You need to add more more fog for the bg. The ships are blending well, but a little bit more fog and dust particles will do great job. Adjust some hues so the colors are similar, the small ship in the middle is standing out too much. Color balance and curves will make it just right. Good job man!

darvinkmanwah
10-14-2011, 08:09 AM
Any progress on this Sean ... would like to see more ...

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