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mrtuesday42
05-06-2010, 06:50 PM
hi everyone, i am currently a junior at UCF in orlando working on getting my BFA in animation. i am hopefully going to go into either movies or games, i am not overly particular. i am focusing on modeling more than anything in my work, as well as my instructor pushing more of an 'artistic meaning' behind it. i welcome critique. i may try to defend my work and what i did, but i want to get better is the bottom line. i work in maya mainly now, learned in 3dsmax. am going to get back into zbrush probably this summer. doing an internship working with grad students and their game design projects so we will see. thanks for the input guys.

http://vimeo.com/11128144

i know this is a serious critique forum and thats what i need. i dont need a bunch of people telling me how good it is when its not. thanks for taking a look.

alek

Grashock
05-06-2010, 08:38 PM
I'm not exactly sure what your trying to convey with your most recent video. While the 'tech' demo is interesting, the content may put any potential clients out. In addition, with nearly half of the footage contains that demo, doesn't really convey any skill other then the ability to play with webcams and 3d targeting in space. It doesn't show that your an animator, or display any real quality 3d work.

As for the second piece, the same content warning applies. The animation is pretty static, and there are sections where the walk cycle doesn't jive with where he's going. Something to consider is that walking propels you forward, so the speed of the steps and the movement of the character need to be in sync.

When working with a video, specifically a commercial (that's what a reel is) consider your target audience and tailor that video to meet the objectives you set forth. If you want to showcase your tech skills, do so, but make it attractive. If you want to showcase your ability to animate, create some interesting animations, while covering your bases with walk/run cycles. The models don't have to be spectacular, but a good smooth animation, with some personality will go a long way.

JWRodegher
05-06-2010, 09:04 PM
Well, about the editing of the reel itself I would make a lot shorter with the best of the best. The augmented reality segment lasts way too long in my opinion, and the rest could be edited so it only shows the best parts.

Hope it helps.

kelvincai
05-07-2010, 06:26 AM
I assume your reel is mostly for job/internship hunting. So, I would comment based on that.

The argument reality piece is clearly an image recognition programming project. Any programmer background managers hiring will clearly know it. So, the notes before and after this piece is kinda redundant. For any artistic background managers hiring will critique the rendering . It is not 3D like. You should improve the 3D rendering to a standard 3D game level, with at least some shadow and phong shading. In the resume/breakdown, you could indicate what programming languages, what libraries, and if it is a team project or all done by yourself. So, you could crop down the length of this piece in the reel.

For the other piece, the rendering and animation quality should be much higher. Please take a look at the lighting mini-challenge in this forum.

As others mentioned, only put your best works.

kelvincai
05-07-2010, 06:34 AM
[duplicate post]

flashgordy
05-07-2010, 07:45 AM
hello
as for me the first part should only be mentioned in this reel, not constitute half of the time - I thought at most a few seconds

the objects which showed, the most I like a grenade, although there is no texture

Flying Vagina- no dynamic and little too long-weary after a few moments, because basically nothing happens

simple items such as folded newspaper, and leg -in my opinion should not be at all the main hero reel

house on the farm has the potential - pretty cool, you need to work on the light, - more sun and stronger, now it is dull

essentially as your reel is designed to cover modeling and texturing, then concentrate on the topic

rule - at the beginning of the reel you give the best work in the middle a little worse, at the end good as on the beginning

generally - when employer see reel, he should call you - what I saw at this stage makes that I am not at all encouraging

I know you can do a few boxes, newspapers, or buildings, but something more complicated like a face or a car engine?

I hope that does not hurt much;)
sorry for my english

regards

playmesumch00ns
05-07-2010, 07:49 AM
Have to agree that nothing on there does anything to show off your modelling skills.

Also I don't know what you hope to achieve by calling yourself a "pervert" on the slate frame of your reel.

szewei
05-07-2010, 09:09 AM
I agree about the augmented reality thing: too long.

I would also suggest moving things around. Your best work or what you most want to show off should be at the beginning. Personally I think the grenade part was pretty good but it comes so late in the reel...
Just my 2 cents... hope that helps!

Zerflag
05-07-2010, 09:21 AM
i agree with the previous posts. the reel is much too long. look at keeping your reel under 2 minutes. showcase only your best work. to be honest, none of what's on your reel really has that "finished" quality to it.
maybe that's all the work you have, and you have to put a reel together for class, that's ok.
my recommendations are as follows:
1: clearly state what position the reel is an advertisement for. your reel opens up with "modeler" but then demonstrates augmented reality stuff and then low poly modeling work. neither of those really showcases the abilities of a modeler.
2. unless you really are looking for work as a sexual deviant, lose the "pervert" part of the card. a reel is supposed to be a professional calling card, and while it's sometimes cool to put a joke on there, this one probably doesn't serve your best interests.
3. pick 2 or 3 projects and really focus on those. make those the best you can possibly make them. those, once finished, can be your reel.

building up a body of work takes a while. i think most artistic people suffer from unfinished project syndrome. fight that urge to move on to something new before completing a project. you'll be much happier with the end result.

kag122
05-07-2010, 11:05 AM
I would really consider the content that you have on the reel.
Sexual poses and flying dicks and a flying vagina isn't going to get you remembered in a positive light.
You could have chosen anything and you decided with that. It really reflects on your maturity and considering the amount of big boobed women that are modeled in this industry it puts you in the same category as them.
This isn't good.

digitalputty
05-07-2010, 08:13 PM
I agree with kag122.

I saw the 'pervert' bit in the intro and pretty much didn't want to watch anymore (however I did watch the rest). You are going to offend a LOT of people with this reel. Remember that not every one thinks "SEX SEX SEX" all the time ... and if you have a female interviewer you probably won't get very far past the initial viewing of the reel (yes, I am a female).

Personally, I would cut everything between the beginning and time stamp 3:42. Then, slow down your camera on the outdoor scene with the wind turbine. Take some time to show your viewers what you have made.

The scene with the house and the windmill ... pause on it for a while and let the viewer take in what is there. Then perhaps fade into the grenade ...??

The bit at the end with the grenade was, IMO, the best thing in the reel. However, the light that keeps changing in the background confuses me. And I would see what I could do about those flickering lines on the environment cylinder ... make them thicker, or leave them out.

Hope this helps.

leigh
05-07-2010, 08:25 PM
I switched this off at 1:20. If you're hoping to get a job with this, I suggest you rethink your entire strategy. Everything I saw was frankly boring - I had no idea what I was even looking at, and didn't even realise he was holding his cock until the female joined in. Once the female appeared and started blowing the guy, I closed it. I have no idea why you thought this was a good idea for a reel, but I can assure you it's not.

It's not even suitable for this forum. I would recommend you adopt a more mature and serious approach to your work if you want to work in the industry, unless you're aiming to work in CG porn. There's a time and place for porn, but this isn't it.

MechanicalSiren
05-07-2010, 11:22 PM
The real time tracking was interesting, but why in the world did you put so much graphic porn type scenarios in it? There are better ways to get yourself noticed and remembered.

JaredTaylor
05-08-2010, 12:07 AM
The only thing I can critique here is you, not your work. This demoreel is a disgrace to 3D. And all you're probably going to get is people telling you, well, not like you said - how good or bad it is - but how bad it is.

What were you thinking when you posted this, when you made this, when you came up with the idea -- all that thinking, and this was the result?

Why would an employer even consider you?

The work itself is terrible too... Don't try and fix it, start again, do something 'professional'.

That's my 'critique' for you.

Ralle
05-08-2010, 12:17 AM
I realy don't know, if you mean this serious or if you just kidding with us.
My advice, take it off as soon as posible and the "A kok" video, too. DON'T send this to any company!

The reel you have uploaded 4 months ago to vimeo, is in comparsion way better.

You can't be serious, this is ridiculous

CJ3D
05-08-2010, 05:55 AM
I have to agree. Your previous reel was waaaaaay better. However if you have to show everyone just how "rebellious" and "daring" you are and absolutely must include some sort of pornographic material, make it tasteful or meaningful. If you want to model a cock then you won't get anywhere with a cylinder and a sphere. Make it PHOTO REAL, and possibly do something artistic with it! Make it mean something. Not just porn for porn sake. There are a ton of professional artists that create real art using pornographic material such as showing a penis and vagina, but it depends on the subject matter and what you are trying to convey with your piece. Before tackling this sort of art form, first you have to grow up and think about what it means to you as an artist and not whether or not anyone is going to get aroused by it. Having a penis chase a flying vagina could make an interesting video but again, make it photo real and the animation had better be stellar.

CJ

IestynRoberts
05-08-2010, 03:41 PM
Hey. I'd have to agree with everyone here about the content of the reel.

So - I'm going to just quickly talk about the title card with your name on it. Having an animated title card at the beginning is a bad idea. Find yourself a simple font, and don't have it shacking about the place like crazy. The 'What you see before you..' bit come in and covers your name - it's looking really ugly.

You want the information to stand out, be clear and not last 17 seconds.

Another thing - the animation itself. I'd go back to the basics, start out with a simple exercise that will teach you timing and overlap, such as a bouncing ball with a tail - and work your way from there. The tentacles on the 'Vagina' is just floating around - much more work needed. The run of the character was very static, with not much going for it.

Kanga
05-08-2010, 10:35 PM
I turned it off half way too.
There was nothing in there that I found attractive. Apart from the tech (I wasnt sure what I was looking at) thing everything needs work.

embryotic
05-10-2010, 05:37 AM
If you want to be a crazy guerrilla designer - maybe just keep doin exactly what you are doing - I dont understand it but surely 0.001% of crazy people like you become millionaires..

But if you want to seriously follow a more accepted path:

Did you create some software that is reading and rendering those cards? - that seem really marketable to me, brainstorm a practical use for it and create a demo video
For instance: You are selling a furniture visualisation tool - make a professional looking video (like a short infomercial) even fake up the tech a bit if its not there 100%

you could try to pay attention to some details like that, e.g a professional looking video wouldn't be using a street art style font for no reason.
and your screen capture wouldn't have all the toolbars at the top etc

I like your balls! but people are just gonna think you're a weirdo! ;)

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