VISHAL-WIP Sep'09-3D REFINED (Jump on a box and then jump down on the other)

[Nodge]

On the jump on and off a box, for me he puts too much weight down on frame 13-14, and I reckon it takes away from him building power for the jump on the next step. However, I really like the way he pauses anticipating the drop when he's coming off the box.

[dbalmert]

Chasm jump-

He speeds up HORIZONTALLY when falling. I know you're going for stylized gravity, but come on. Trace the arcs on frames 30-33 and you'll see what I mean. Even if he tilts his body, he will fall the same speed. What you probably did is re-interpret his speed based on the angle of his body, which is a no-no, unless he's a DBZ character zipping around the frame.

If you pull right cliff a little closer and re-keyed those frames, then it would probably be okay.


Box Jump -

Have you ever tried walking and jumping with your feet that wide apart? It's too much strain on your knees. You don't have enough forward momentum to do a mostly-one legged jump. the only way to do that is with the other foot swinging.

His head does the "Hen Peck" thingy for most of it, and that's not a good thing usually. If his head is leading, let it lead. Don't have it lag behind the movement unless he's being drunk, uncoordinated, or dramatic.

The right leg comes up and back too far on the way up. He's wasting a lot of energy. His leg should barely glide up. The right leg is the one he's mostly pushing off with, so it would only come up that high if he were performing some sort of act. If you tried to act out the thing he's doing, you'd probably hit the top of your arch on the box corner!

His head comes up way too quick on the dip after falling. He whips it up really fast.

If he's being "dainty" about falling off the box, why doesn't he land toe-first on top of the box the first time? He lands awkwardly flat footed.

Consider the framing of the shot, too. I know it's just a playblast, but you still have to consider composition. He walks from the 3/4 of to the of the screen to the left edge - Re-tune the camera's position of don't have him walk so far. I expected him to walk off camera with the way it was composed, and when he didn't it was awkward.

Also, the arc on the slow toe-fall needs to be adjusted. It's too linear right now.

He seems to be walking diagonally after he gets off the box. If I can see 3 sides of the box, then he shouldn't be walking on the exact axis of the horizon. You can get away with anything in film as long as it looks good in the camera, but if it doesn't even look right in the camera ...


Hope this helps!

[vishalvyas2006]

Thanks man I am really really looking forward for this kind of critique so that i can improve my animation and i got it now .......

So definately I will work on those things which u have pointed out......

Thanks A Lot...........

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