Japanese Subway Interior

[Scott31]

http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj314/scottmichael28/SchoolGirlBus03.jpg

Heres the update with more color. Thanks alot!

[SmallPoly]

As far as style goes, if it looks good, it is good. Trust your instincts, and if that doesn't work, pick apart work you like until your instincts get better.

If the girl is meant to be the focal point, then you should consider making her brighter and dimming the lit area on the back right.

I'd suggest blocking out some grayscale thumbnail images to get a better idea of what you want to do with the lighting.

There are also a few perspective issues that could be fixed.

Are using a tablet?

[Scott31]

http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj314/scottmichael28/SchoolGirlBus04.jpg

Fixed some perspective issues, biggerized the head a bit, fixed the local color issue with the girl's clothes, added slight reflections to the windows and a few other little things you may or may not notice. What do you think? Thank you :)

I'm using a Wacom Graphire4 tablet. I'm not sure what you meant by "blocking out some grayscale thumbnail images". Thank you much velenosangue!

[SpiritHunter]

I'm not sure what you meant by "blocking out some grayscale thumbnail images".

He means experiment with the lighting by painting just values, no color, on a small version of the image. This is so that you can just try things out without fear of messing anything up. Pros do it all the time.

I think your latest version looks good! I really like how she seems to be in her own little world, because real trains in Tokyo are very colorless and are very quiet, and she seems to find color and excitement where there isn't any.

3 things I would suggest (and you don't have to take any):

1. Instead of centering your subject, put it more to the side of the image. This will put more interest in the composition. I'm sure you're familiar with the rule of thirds, this will help. Increase the area of the the image to the right by making the train longer by one row of seats, and you can accomplish this; the girl will fall on the left third line. You don't have to repaint too much, cut out what you already did, scale and reposition it and then paint over the seams.

2. Hone the detail in on your subject a bit, the rest can be loose and blurry but as she is obviously the focal point she needs to have facial and clothing detail. The focal point should be the highest rendered part of the image.

3. This one's more subjective, but here goes. Paint in some other people around her in low detail who aren't in the spotlight. This would add interest to the scene by placing contrasting subject matter to the girl, who is happy and bright, while everyone else will be glum and dark (plus its not often to have only one person on the train in Tokyo...has to be last call and girls would instead be taking a taxi or something). I would even suggest maybe add a dude's legs and suitcase on the right in silhouette to create some z depth :)

I highly recommend 1 and 2 to increase the strength of your image; 3 like I said is subjective.

-Davis

[Scott31]

http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj314/scottmichael28/SchoolGirlBus05.jpg

Here's the next one. I tried to paint a spotlight of sorts around the girl.

Thanks alot for the advice. I can't find the link anymore but I started with a reference I found on the internet. there were originally 2 girls and I took one out. I added of course the pink lights and the posters.

[Scott31]

http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj314/scottmichael28/SchoolGirlBus06.jpg

Redid the face/skin...a little bigger (let me know if it doesn't post). Is the detail too small bacause I didn't know how else to do it? This may be it...not sure. Thanks :)

[SpiritHunter]

Hey,

I like the addition of the blue, it unifies the image a bit more and adds variety. It's starting to look more complete. Now that we're getting into details,

1. The legs and skirt look nice proportionally, but at this point I would probably slim her shirt out a little more as Japanese girls tend to wear slim-fit clothing. You are right about the face, scale it up a bit and see what kind of results you get.

2. As for facial features, it takes practice. Define the nose a little more with the lighting scheme you have going on. Analyze the face shapes of your reference.

3. Finish off the shadows on the seat behind her legs. If they blend into her legs, try lightening the stockings a bit; after all they are transparent nylon.

4. Perspective issues: it's better this time around, but where the problem's most noticeable is in the foreshortening of the seats. Attached is a basic but useful technique for foreshortening.

I hope this helps!

-D

[Scott31]

http://i275.photobucket.com/albums/jj314/scottmichael28/SchoolGirlBus08.jpg
Thank you so much for all the help. I've learned more from this painting than any other. Here's the finished product (I think...though I still need a name). One last question though. I have no idea how good this actually is in the grand scheme of things. I know it's not advanced level for sure, but I don't know if it's beginner either. I ask because I have never posted a 2d work on any gallery before and wonder how close I am to being ready to start doing so.

[SpiritHunter]

You're very welcome!

I'll start by saying that anyone of any skill level is allowed to register CGTalk and post on these forums, so long as they approach with a good attitude and are truly wanting to become better at the digital and non-digital arts.

I haven't seen any of your other works, I've only seen this one and its process. Your painting is not bad at all, it ended up nicely. The lighting is good, your figure is correct and her expression and pose is interesting.

But I can see that you need more practice. Don't be discouraged. You're at a beginner level, but you're definitely not at square one. I can tell you've got a knack for lighting and shapes, and a sense for what looks "correct." You can easily become an intermediate-level artist by mastering the basics of perspective and composition.

My advice for you:
-Learn how to draw perspective so that you can do it right every time (remember the foreshortening technique, and look up how to use vanishing points and such)
-Learn composition (namely the rule of thirds, you generally don't want to center your subjects...with special exceptions of course. Once you know the rules you're allowed to break 'em.)
-Don't be discouraged, go for it.
-Look at the works of the art masters, old and new.
-Draw as much as possible. Whenever you draw, you learn.
-Get critiques as much as you can, from CGSociety and people you know.

Those are what you should concetrate on right now, but after perspective and composition, master the human figure.

Signing off for now...good job, and good luck my friend!

-D

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