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joelyabrudy
07-26-2003, 12:11 AM
Ok, let me try this here.
I got zero comments in the 3D Art category.

Let me know whatever you think. If it's good, if it sucks, anything.

Download here... (http://www.fantastic3d.com/blast8.mov)

joel

animatabull
07-26-2003, 12:37 PM
First of all I like it.

First part is spot on, I think there should be more movement on 'everything!!' ie. arms up in air maybe, more exaggerated head turn.


On ' I allow it!!' you dont get a sense of how loud he is saying it imo. Not sure how I'd fix that.

On 'I decide who....' the movement seems a bit, for want of a better word, robotic, not fluid.

Anyways gotta go, hope that helps a little.

DLDude
07-26-2003, 04:27 PM
For me, the issue was his facial expression. The audio is very... angry. Yet his eyes are wide open like he is happy. He needs to be scowling. I dont see any anger in his eyes or anyhting. See if that doesnt improve the scene a little!

keithlango
07-27-2003, 10:09 AM
I could comment on this that or the other in your animation, but the single greatest flaw is your choice of camera position.
For a cinematic moment like this, staging is everything.
Think- if this were a live action shot and you were the director, where would you put the camera? I know where the camera was in this movie (medium close up and turning I believe).
This monologue has several key moments of silence- moments where the actor is speaking without saying a word. What part of his body will allow those unspoken thoughts to best be seen? The face here is the most important thing- especially during those heavy pauses where his eyes and his expression will convey so much more than his body.

By staging this as a long shot (full body) and not a medium or medium close up, you're saying that his body is most important. Long shots are for action shots or to establish the character in their environment or to make a cinematic comment about the character's place in his or her world. Well here, that's pretty irrelevant. So I'd suggest getting your camera in closer, use those silent moments to full effect. Act through the face. The body stuff here is OK, but it's not the right kind of staging for this kind of a shot. There's alot of energy on your part being spent on stuff that isn't going to do the best job of conveying the depth of emotion that this character is showing.

Them's my opinions. Hope that helps.
-k

CarmineRedrum
07-28-2003, 04:16 PM
I agree the first part is strong...where he pounds the desk. After that it goes a little downhill. The movements become stiff and loose a little life. For instance the delivery of the line, "Im in charge of everything" has the beginning of a good movement. It just needs to be exaggerated. IMO the arms should raise slowly (almost to his chest) while he is saying "Im in charge..." then quickly shoot down and too the sides during the first syllable of "...everything!" Basically its the same motion they are doing now...just...exaggerated.

The other part that Im not to sure of is after he says "allow it". He steps back and raises his hand slightly. This gesture is hard to read and I dont get what he is doing. That may just be me though...

joelyabrudy
07-29-2003, 12:52 AM
Thanks a lot for your replies. This is the kind of stuff I need to hear.
I'll make all the necessary changes and try to post an update soon.


joel

eek
07-29-2003, 10:32 AM
Man his too stiff in his acting!. And this pulls everything down including the lip-sync. THe lip sync should be the bonus you add at the end. I like the idea of his helmet slipping, but there so much rage in his voice, that i dont think it would happen. "THIS IS MY TOWN"- his telling them a statement, maybe point to his chest or slamming it down. "YOU LIVE TO SEE THE DAWN" - he could be looking around at specific audience members or even leave his stand walking back and forth."I DECIDE WHO LIVES(point to his chest) OR WHO DIES"(points out to audience) I dont understand the hand gesture, his not calming the audience and there's no applaud.

Act it out your self(this is what i do) and find different approaches the one that sticks consistently is the one i use. At Framestore i used to do this, we had 2 rigs, so you get the performance right as if was mime then add the lip-sync next. Also the performance adds to the lipping.

This guy's in a rage, and he's mightly p***ed off, also hes the head. This is from the quick and the dead film, i think its after hes killed his own hitman, hes walking round telling the crowd. Also its spontaneous! What whould you do? if you knew the town wanted you dead! Also his shouting, so hell probably be looking up and around to see all the crowd.


eek

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