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View Full Version : Need some Critique - Molten Landscape

RunicP
06-23-2009, 04:30 PM
I started this piece a few days ago working on it in my free time when im not enslaved by job as a sys admin heh. (yeah its slavery, think tal rasha and baal although in my case baal is my technical side and tal rasha is enslaved in his tomb trying to escape)

lol where did that come from......

Anyways I am looking for critique to further improve the piece. I am keeping things pretty muted until I near more what I want as a composition. After I arrive at my "happy place" with the placement and color I will add saturation to select areas. The beige vertical lines in the color sketch indicate buildings. I imagine these being very industrial / steampunk inspired.


Color Sketch
http://rookery3.aviary.com/storagev12/1602000/1602373_8106.jpg



Progress #1
http://rookery3.aviary.com/storagev12/1602000/1602368_615f.jpg


Foreground Concept #1 (Im still trying to wrap my head around the foreground pieces)
http://rookery3.aviary.com/storagev12/1610000/1610054_84da.jpg


Critiques Very much Welcomed. Be Honest or whats the point ;) Sugar Coating hurts the teeth.
RunicP
06-23-2009, 06:16 PM
Sorry for the Double Post. I didnt see this post come up so I posted another. I read after that that you have your first two posts manually validated...

Dont see an option for deletion of your own posts...
Ingraban
06-23-2009, 06:28 PM
I like the basic atmosphere, but I notice a few things on the composition.

The vulcan on the right unbalaces the bicture because it's too dominant,
to counter it you should at least add an illuminated building on the left side.

Also the river could be a bit wider to light up the valley.

The sky should definitely reflect the glowing ground, maybe add some red hue.

For the buildung(s) I'd suggest a surface and form that fits in the landscape, so a bit molten and coverd by dust. I have something like the buildings from Riddic in mind, from that prison planet, if you know what I mean.

I hope I could help you somehow, good luck with it furthermore.
BigRed11
06-23-2009, 07:29 PM
I agree with all of the points above. I do like the volcano on the right, but it's too much of a focal point, especially considering that it's at the very edge of the frame. Perhaps switch that volcano and the one on the left? Are you going to add streams of lava flowing down the slopes of the volcanoes?

And as for the foreground, if you are going to do industrial structures for the city, then it would fit to have a very heavy, rounded, and rugged structure, something that looks like it could withstand constant bombardment by volcanic explosions and lava.

I really like where this is going, can't wait to see where you take it.
RunicP
06-23-2009, 08:09 PM
I appreciate the reply and the time you spent looking at my work.

Ill be working on this more tonight so any critiques that I get today will be fresh in my head when im working on this piece.


Anyone have anything else to add to what has been said? These points will help me refine this piece to something I may or may not be proud of lol.

Thanks again guys and gals.
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06-23-2009, 08:09 PM
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