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DeeDee508
01-23-2009, 02:19 AM
Hey this is my first post here.

Right this is an animation for a uni project still learning the software and stuff. But my primary goal here is to recieve critisism. on the actual animation and story as opposed to modelling, rendering/lighting.

The more precise the critisism the better. Thanks in advance if you spare the time.


Link to animation on youtube (http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=6fQ6nAfGATw)
Obraxis
01-23-2009, 01:03 PM
Hi there - welcome to CGTalk! :)

I wont comment on anything but the animation, as that's what you've asked for. The animation in general lacks timing and weight. The girl's walk from what I can tell, needs a bit of work. Specifically I noticed the hips were doing something slightly strange, and her center of gravity seems off in parts. Be careful with her right hand/arm, is goes out to the side quite far during the walk for seemingly no reason and would throw her off balance.

The face into the bat is very soft. If it's meant to be a surprise, then she needs to be not facing the bat, then turns her face into it quickly as she gets to it, and with more weight into it and a thud. If the bat isn't made of stone, then it and her should get some kind of follow-through like a swinging or something to denote hitting and weight.

When she is touching the Bat for the first time, her right arm looks very uncomfortably out to her side. While you may have been going for a better silhouette, it looks more uncomfortable than anything else. Also her fingers are all moving at exactly the same time - when you touch items they don't all move in unison. Her expression of "Ohh/Huh" is quite slow for a reaction of the bat's quick wings.

I know that you don't want to hear about your models, but it looks like you have some rigging limitations which could stop you from improving this further.

I would suggest if you want to improve your animation, you need to study timing and weight of characters. You can start with some simple ball excersises. If you want reference material and help with timing, I would suggest these books:

Acting for Animators (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Acting-Animators-Complete-Performance-Animation/dp/032500580X/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1232719193&sr=1-1) by Ed Hooks
Timing for Animation (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Timing-Animation-Harold-Whitaker/dp/0240517148/ref=pd_sim_b_1) by Harold Whitaker
The Animator's Survival Kit (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Animators-Survival-Kit-Principles-Stop-motion/dp/0571202284/ref=pd_sim_b_2) by Richard Williams

These books will help give you a foundation on learning about timing and weight from traditional backgrounds, which you can then apply to your CG work. Good luck! :)
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