PDA

View Full Version : Character: KingMob: CG_challenge Entry Girl/demon/stuff


KingMob
06-23-2003, 08:15 PM
Hey guys, well lemme get this out of the way

Software: Clay

Time Working: off and on for about a week or so...not really sure actually

and now the fun part, I will make a thread int he challenge area for this to, but want to get some honest feedback as well,

Thigns of note, the body and legs are still super WIP-ish, the hands and feet are not even started(so no she wont be a flippered freak)

and the horns are temp, just to get a feel for how I want them to look, I have not added the skin folds and such that will grow around them... so feel free to tell me whats right, wrong, and just plain scary.

http://ian.gravityfree.com/girl/girlFront.jpg

http://ian.gravityfree.com/girl/girlSide.jpg

http://ian.gravityfree.com/girl/girlcloseup.jpg

Soulstorm
06-23-2003, 08:24 PM
i think the breasts are positioned a tad too high, and the keybones look a bit odd

KingMob
06-23-2003, 08:25 PM
ok as per a friedns request, heres a rough rough concept sketch I did, Ill try and get access to a scanner to show better shots.

and a wire shot, and a new side shot

http://ian.gravityfree.com/girl/roughsketch.jpg

http://ian.gravityfree.com/girl/girlside2.jpg


http://ian.gravityfree.com/girl/wires.jpg

Hexodam
06-23-2003, 08:28 PM
hard to say at such an early stage, but there is one thing I find strange and that is the forehead, on the side pictures. I think the forehead shouldnt slope so much, hope you understand what I mean.

road
06-23-2003, 08:32 PM
The biggest thing I can see right off the bat is that the ears are too low...
This is immeadiately noticable in the front view of your image...
Seems in the side view they are fine but in the front view they seem off.. so that may be an optical illusion from the horns...
but you may try moving them up a touch to see if it looks better...

Other than that she's looking good! ..

thanx
road

flewp
06-23-2003, 08:46 PM
Well, great start. Not sure what to comment on since it seems pretty early in the WIP stages.

At this point though, the face/head just seems a bit too generic. The head also seems a bit soft at this point too. With this kind of character, I'd expect some kind of defining features, something that stands out a bit more (in terms of the facial structure, the horns add some defining features, but I mean the face/head itself) I'd also much rather see the horns slightly blended/smoothed with the rest of the head, rather than being seperate objects.

Grayscale
06-23-2003, 09:09 PM
I agree with the comment about the breasts. I also agree that the ears look slightly lower then they should be. It's hard to give a super hard critique at such an early WIP. It is looking good. I like the design as well. I would drop the breasts abit lower (not much), and raise the ears just a hair. Great start! Can't wait to see more of this character.

l_farley13_l
06-23-2003, 09:15 PM
An imidiate reaction to the whole figure for me is lack of srong curves. With the concept the sweep of the pencil is very nice but doesn't quite transilate to the 3d body.
ex : the hips seem underdeveloped and the abdomen down seem flat. The arms seem to lack some form. If you can get the the swoosh (gotta love that word) into the body at this early stage it'll stay there for the rest of the modeling! [edit don't get too realistic it's boring :)]

Looking forward to more progress!!

Farley

SheepFactory
06-23-2003, 09:23 PM
Looking good so far Ian ,

I noticed some proportion issues though , looks like the model is 5 heads long , while she should be 6 or 7.

take a look at this :

http://www.fineart.sk/page029.gif

Looking forward to see the update.

Soulstorm
06-23-2003, 09:30 PM
i agree with sheep factory. i think the torso is too long and the legs are too short

Dave Black
06-23-2003, 10:06 PM
The chest(rib cage section) of the torso is too short. You should draw this section down(lengthen it), and with it the breasts. Also, there is a distinct lack of thickness from the Lateralis Dorsi muscles in combination with the ribs. Try widening the thorasic area to accomidate these structures. This operation will also draw out the clavicals, arms, and connecting structures.

-3DZ

Raul-Reznek
06-23-2003, 10:06 PM
Ok KingM. this is the place where u get the cold water shower :D no offence

This is an analysis form my p.o.v. on the character

THE FORM : - disproportioned, the measurements of teh body are off compared to the head
- facial mesurements are pretty much good but the corners of the mouth are NOT on the same direction as the pupils, and some more details
- The body lacks the finesse of a woman, adn i
m not talking about one of those fashion models, it's a disgrace i think to give women such a form, i suggest u look at Michelangelo's sculptures (Dawn and Dusk)
- Ears are too low
- The pubian/abdomen area should be rounder and more lively
- The belly button is too low it' not EXACLTY at 1/3 it's a bit lower

THE IDEA of teh character : in one word, archetipal, which means that it's what everyone would ahve thought of if they said deil girl or so.
- a VERY bad combination of woman sexuality and VIOLENCE, example - she's naked and has HORNS and will have a big weapon - archetipal thinking
- archetipal proportions, big breasts big waist and so on
- and LOTS more man

What u need to do - you're a tallented artist, i can feel it in your works, u need to start thinking antropomorphicly(dunno if it's spelled correctly)

Think WHY your character has horns, is she bashing head to head with another female for teritorial rights, for a partener, what?
Why is she tall and so on, ask youself questions like these.

I bet u already know all this, but i think it's time u start applying them


Cheerz mate! :D

KingMob
06-23-2003, 10:16 PM
thanks for all the feedback guys keep it coming!

Raul: Yeha man totally agree with ya about the concept in general, which Is one reason I havent exactly 'attached' the horns yet. I may not keep the ram horns, I just thought it added something to her "hair" or lack thereof hehe,

Also she will not be naked in the final, I realize that the concept sketch does not show that, as i said its a quickie, she will actually have some armor on, cause I always hate in fighting games how girl fihgt in high heels and a small dress haha.

And no need to apologize for the cold shower treatment, thats why this forum is here
:beer:

Im going to work on the costume and groundwork of the character soon, so i will post as I go and would love this kind of honest feedback while I work.

And yeah as for the body itself, I havent realyl gotten into the body to much, so all these comment in advance are great!

Thanks to everyone for your comments, as I will be reading them all very carefully and reworking a lot of areas, and as I get to other parts

Rei Ayanami
06-23-2003, 10:37 PM
Aside from above, i think the waist should be thinner, or make the chest sides more curvy. the side of a female should be shaped like an hourglass, this looks like it is more male on the bottom parts. just IMHO though could be the style.

also gap between nose and mouth looks a small bit to long.

Rye
06-23-2003, 11:02 PM
King, first off I think the concept sketch is lookin' good, but you are asking for critiques on the model SOOO....It looks as though her rib cage is missing. Her chest just seems really flat (aside from the breasts). I think the character design isn't anything spectacular though. I've seen you do some amazing and original character concepts, whereas with those little "mohawk" horns this looks a bit like a Zabrak clone (the same species as Darth Maul) from the Star Wars Galaxies game. The skeleton guy on the other hand looks MUCH more interesting. Granted its good to model a nude female, especially to help yourself learn anatomy, but it just doesn't look like anything new. Knowing you though, the design will change half way through and we'll see a competely different incarnation of this demon.

KingMob
06-23-2003, 11:06 PM
". Knowing you though, the design will change half way through"

damn im predictable as hell lol.... Like i said I wish I had a scanner so you guys could tell me what you think of some fo the concepts I have done thus far to make her a little less same ol same ol...

I am thinging of extending the horns/spikes on the fornt of her head waaaaay out.... almost to the point of ridiculous ness, and taking her ram horns way in so they are more feminine.

Raul had a godo point, about her not really head butting people as a form of defense, so why would they grow that way... tho i must say it would be funny to animate that.

Ill post updates soon!

ambient-whisper
06-23-2003, 11:39 PM
Cool. About time you posted her.
Heres what I see that’s wrong with her so far. In the concept image she seems to be a rather demonic chick that is in good shape. But in the ¾ view and the side view that you provided she looks like her posture is of a person that has had a desk job for many years

http://ambient-whisper.cgcommunity.com/images_dump/Critiques/KingMob/Female-Demon/Back-Neck.jpg

The main areas for posture to look out for are the back, shoulders, and neck.
In the concept look at her heck. Its long and rather straight up.
In the model however you see the neck being shorter, and also slouching, giving her that less energetic look of a 90 year old woman.
The picture of the young man shows a more healthy posture.


The next point is on the shoulders. In your model, currently the shoulders are too far away from the actual body.

http://ambient-whisper.cgcommunity.com/images_dump/Critiques/KingMob/Female-Demon/shoulder.jpg

Next thing is the waist. Right now it looks too “boyish”. Women have a larger pelvis and smaller waist. Right now in your model there’s a lack of curvature around that area as well. Notice in the model on the right the curve going from the waist through the leg. In yours we can see the large bodunkadunk butt  while it should only be visible when we start to rotate further around. Right now what is happening in your model is that your using the butt to define the width of a womans pelvis. Whereas it should be the pelvis+thighs that should define the width.
Take note of where the horizontal line is. right now your belly/button is a bit too low. It should be moved up a bit.
Legs could also stand to be a bit longer. Right now they are too small. Long legs are sexy. Don’t forget about them. The crotch area-> belly distance is too small right now as well. Move that up. This goes well together with the belly button.

http://ambient-whisper.cgcommunity.com/images_dump/Critiques/KingMob/Female-Demon/butt-waist.jpg

and last but not least, the nostrils are way too thin. And have a bit too sharp an angle when they meet the rest of the face. Also included the ear so you can play around with that. And pay attention to the eyelids/brows

http://ambient-whisper.cgcommunity.com/images_dump/Critiques/KingMob/Female-Demon/head.jpg

Raul-Reznek
06-25-2003, 08:43 AM
seems my post didn't get thru

ambient, where did u get the woman on the second row, some very interesting anatomy there, could u give us or me a link?

thx a lot
bye

Max4d
06-26-2003, 06:28 PM
Hey

Raul, as i remember correctly, the woman is from a book called Anatomy for Artists by Sarah Simblet, cause i have that book in my possesion. Great anatomy stuff there, you can buy it on amazon.com. Hope this helps. :D:D:D

Greetz Max4d

CGTalk Moderation
01-15-2006, 11:00 AM
This thread has been automatically closed as it remained inactive for 12 months. If you wish to continue the discussion, please create a new thread in the appropriate forum.