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View Full Version : Can I Ask For Some Critiques???


ajfrank
12-28-2008, 01:35 AM
Hi everybody. :wavey: Last time i post my work here for critiques i had a few good inputs. I'm hoping for the same again, or even better(more critiques), this time around. I have a near completed version of one of my animations I've been working on. I'm about done with the animation. Right now I'm working with the dynamics and looking for someone to texture and light it while I'm working on my other animations. I dont know too much about dynamics yet and this will be my first animation with dynamics. But in any case here's my animation:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZvidwMSUY2k

The main thing that is bugging me the mist is when he lands onto the wall and when he get up from the landing and turns around. Something about them two areas is bugging me. Just dont flow right or something. Any suggestions anybody? Please help out a fellow animator by giving me a hard, rough critique. :thumbsup:


Thanks in advance for anybody who does.

f_jo
12-28-2008, 02:37 PM
Okay here's my two cents.... I'm gonna be harsh and honest with you.

The ninja's run cycle could be worked more. It feels really stiff and not fluid at all. You should consider practicing this area alot more before going into something else. And he slowed down too much when he anticipated the jump to the wall.

On the second shot, the timing is off. He slowed down when he catapult himself from the wall. And there's no weight on the ninja when he grabs the wall.

As for the ninja landing on the third shot, check on my thread, I'm quite satisfied with mine but I'm waiting for crits also.

There's no weight shift or even weight illusion when the monster steps back on the fourth shot.

Overall, there're too many unnecessary movement (floating movement) after that. Yes, breath is a good way to do a moving hold, but yours are too over.

When the monster chases the ninja the animation is very jerky. Smooth that up and don't forget to put on weight and weight shifts.

hope that helps

cheers

ajfrank
12-28-2008, 05:04 PM
Thanks man. That wasn't too harsh. Thanks for the honesty and critique. That's what I'm looking for.

As far as the run, I kind of know what you mean. I think he feels stiff because he's shifting his weight too much side to side for him to be running at the speed he's running. Maybe? Thats the only thing I can think off. I did the graph editing and everything runs smooth into each other in the editor. But I'll re-look that area and see what I can do.

Good eye on the slow anticipation. Now that i re-look at it it does seems a little too slow. At first it was done purposely so you can see the landing(anticipation), but i do see what you're talking about and i know exactly where i can cut some frames at in that area.

My friends were telling me I should have him bouncing on the wall when he lands(grab it). I think that would help show the weight better. I was nervous about trying to add that because his arm I'k keeps popping when I try to put him at certain poses on the wall area. But I think I'm going to try that. Maybe that would help with the weight issue

The only thing i disagree on i would have to say would be the move and hold poses. I think that part worked out fine because that(other than facial expression) would be the only way to show he's angry plus he just broke down a wall, so he's really going to be doing some heavy breathing. I think if i was to tone it down, he would lose his energy. I'll give it a try though to see how it looks.

But overall thanks again. I appreciate you taking the time to critique my work. Fixing all that shouldn't take too much time so I should be posting an update soon. Maybe even later today. Thanks again. :thumbsup:

Does anybody else have anymore critiques to give?

f_jo
12-29-2008, 02:56 PM
As far as the run, I kind of know what you mean. I think he feels stiff because he's shifting his weight too much side to side for him to be running at the speed he's running. Maybe? Thats the only thing I can think off. I did the graph editing and everything runs smooth into each other in the editor. But I'll re-look that area and see what I can do.

You don't look at the graph editor you should've look and pay attention at the result. You don't show animation studios the graph editor, but you show them the final animation.

ajfrank
12-29-2008, 04:37 PM
Well yeah I know that. Thats common sense. For this project i saved the graph editor for the end and i do look at my results. I don't animate curves, or the graph editor, plus i know what I'm doing when i do use the graph editor. I know how to animate a simple run. As much as i re-look at it, and have other people look at it, we cant find what's so bad or "stiff" about the run.

benjii19
12-29-2008, 06:48 PM
Hey Aj can you upload a quicktime.


Scrubbing through the run frame by frame might give people an idea of what's wrong?

ajfrank
12-29-2008, 09:58 PM
Yeah i can do that. But how do I upload a quicktime video on here? I dont know how to do that... :sad:

f_jo
12-30-2008, 05:54 PM
aj, depends on what kind of run you pursue. If you want to get a realistic run, you should've get yourself a reference video. If you want to get a cartoony run, you must at least master yourself realistic run.

Even when I do a character with non realistic anatomy, my lead always told me to get a reference.

Go look for reference in youtube or something. Shoot yourself with camcorder if necessary. Or fetch yourself a Muybridge The Human Figure in Motion book, it's a great reference book.

cheers.

ajfrank
12-30-2008, 09:40 PM
Thanks for the advice again.
I'm a be honest, when i first started this animation way back, this was only my second run cycle i did. I've been on the track team when i was in high school, played football, worked out and ran almost everyday of my life since i was 8. That being said I kind of already know the basic mechanics of a run. But like you said, reference is always good, no matter the experience level of the animator. I always have some kind of reference. When i did this one, and/or any other walk or run cycle, i always use my Animator's Survival Kit, Richard Williams, as a reference guide. I also have the Muybridge one to. I was going for more of a "he's running for his life" type of a run. The thing that could be throwing it off is the fact that i tried exaggerating some of the poses a little.

And I'm not saying you're wrong. I listen to everybody when it comes to critiquing. If one person sees it, then another may see it too. I do see errors in my run and i did make some changes towards the run since the time i posted the video, mainly just some sliding, weighting issues, twisting actions and fixing up a few of his poses, so far. I also tried lessing the exaggeration of his legs. I'm not getting too much help from this site so far so I'm going to wait until early next week to post my updates so i can give my teachers some time to look at it so they can pin point exactly what needs to be done.
Thanks again

ajfrank
01-07-2009, 05:30 PM
Here's a small update on the ninja chase. I havnt had too much time to work on it. I made some small changes. Cleaned up the run and the wall grab area. Currently I'm working on the monster weight shift from when he first break threw the wall. The dynamics still are not acting right but I'll save that for last. I'm more concern for the animations right now.

Does anybody have any advice/critique for the animation? I need some more fresh eyes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ALGDgaGhZwI

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