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Remi
03-24-2008, 10:25 PM
Ryan Hagen is entered in the "Uplift Universe Challenge" update: View Challenge Page (http://features.cgsociety.org/challenge/uplift_universe/view_entries.php?challenger=14801)

Latest Update: Work In Progress: Uplift - Human Rig
http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1208122506_medium.jpg (http://forums.cgsociety.org/showthread.php?p=5084646#post5084646)

Remi
03-29-2008, 01:04 AM
Here's a part of what i'd like to do, i'm re-writing a bit of it now, and will upload that later. I'm hoping to shorten it a bit and keep it at 2 minutes or under. C&C most welcome. Thanks for having a look!
Is there someplace "official" where I should be uploading this stuff or will this do?



Thursday, March 28, 2008

Uplift Universe: Alien Relations
Draft 1



“Uplifted Uprise”
by Ryan Hagen



Ext. SPACESHIP REPAIR SHOP - MORNING


Establishing shot. Logo (title of short revealed)


slow crane shot, tree covered hills in the background, the neon sign of the repair shop is flickering on and off. Possibly use the neon for the logo, maybe, not sure on that one.


FADE OUT




Act I



Int. Spaceship repair garage
(walla)


Camera moves through the garage and see a few ships in for repairs. The clanking of metal on metal can be heard. Camera comes slows into a fixed position, 3/4 view of a ship with Neo-Toad(unnamed) underneath. Repair shop boss/owner(unnamed) enters frame from screen left, he pauses, turns to Neo-Toad. DURING:



Boss/Owner(unnamed)
(Pissed)
I want all of these ships, out of MY garage,
(beat)
TONIGHT!


Boss/Owner turns and exits frame to screen right.


CUT TO:


ANGLE ON NEO-TOAD; MOVE IN


He’s rolled himself out from under the spaceship and is looking in the direction of the boss/owner, we hear a door slam, neo-toad rolls eyes, and slumps back down and pulls himself back under the ship. He starts back on his work, pounding away, mumbling to himself.


DISSOLVE TO: (Trying to come up with a better way to do this)


Dream sequence. Quick cuts to scenes of the boss/owner yelling at neo-toad. Beatings, other violent interactions. Things from his past. They transition to him dreaming about escaping his life at the repair shop and how it will go, peaceful, violent?


SNAP FADE:


Neo-toad blinks a few times and wipes one of his eyes. He zoned out, and hasn’t been working. He quickly tries to get himself back together. He stumbles a bit and the begins to work again DURING:



Boss/Owner (O.S.)
(Pissed)
GET BACK TO WORK!!!


CUT TO:


ANGLE ON BOSS/OWNER CLOSE UP, MOVE OUT


Boss/Owner is raised up in his red leather chair after yelling at Neo-toad. He’s listening to see if he can hear noises again. Hearing them, he settles back into his chair and resumes his daily activities. He’s going over some bills and rummaging through some paper, when he comes across a piece of paper we can’t see. He leans into his chair and throws his hands behind his head. He’s delighted in how well his business is doing.

DISSOLVE TO:


Dream Sequence. Quick cuts of him in a nice car, drinking champagne while looking down at Neo-Toad while he’s working. Sinister laughs, dollar signs, all that good stuff.


SNAP FADE:


Boss/Owner comes back to, and adjusts himself in his chair. He gets back to going over his papers. He chuckles every now and again as the camera moves out.


FADE OUT







ACT II



Ext. Behind garage - afternoon


Angle on rear of repair shop, Favor Neo-Toad


Enough time to establish.


Neo-toad is taking a break and flipping through a magazine. His foot kicking a tin can. Neo-toads mood suddenly brightens as he’s looking at a page in the magazine.


QUICK CUT:


ANGLE ON magazine page, MOVE IN


BACK TO – Neo-toad


as he looks up and his eyes dart, thinking of his plan. He jumps up and heads for the back door of the garage, opens the door and walks in screen right.


CUT TO:


ANGLE ON Neo-toad


We track with Neo-toad as he walks through the garage and gathers some things. MOVE OUT: We see the shadow of Neo-toad hammer on something.


CUT TO:


ANGLE ON OFFICE DOOR, C.U.-FAVOR Boss/Owner


opening the door to check on his uplift, his eyes squinting.


QUICK CUT:
(shop walla)


Shadow of Neo-toad is seen doing something(looks like he’s working).


BACK TO:


Boss/Owner nods in agreement and slowly creeps back into his office.


FADE TO BLACK:
(shop walla)


Flashes of robot being built on hammer beats. Wires being connected with electical shocks, plates being placed(screwed in). Eyes powering on(glow).


CUT TO:


ANGLE ON Neo-toad and robot


as he stares at his creation.

CUT TO:


Robot “Hero” shot.


RAPID DISSOLVE TO:


Boss/Owner opens his office door violently. The sound of work has died down and he’s upset. He walks towars camera.


CUT TO:


ANGLE ON Boss/Owner as he walks towards where he saw Neo-toad working. DURING:


Boss/Owner
(angry)
WHY AREN’T YOU WORKING!?!
(beat)
THIS IS THE LAAAH…
(interupted)


we look towards Neo-toad as they appear from behind a ship.


CUT TO:


Boss/Owners reaction to seeing the robot for the first time.


CUT TO - W.S. Robot, Neo-toad, Boss/Owner


Neo-Toad smirks and points a finger at Boss/Owner and Robot starts toward him going around Neo-toad.


CUT TO:


C.U. - Boss/Owner


raises his arms up in fear and trembles while letting out a scream.


CUT TO – W.S. Of repair shop – MOVE OUT


Sounds of punching, groans and moans can be heard.


FADE OUT





ACT III


FADE IN:


Ext. Rear of repair shop


ANGLE ON Spaceship


We see Boss/Owner looking beaten up sitting in a spaceship whining. Neo-toad slams the door and slowly Boss/Owner takes off. Neo-toad, quite happy with himself walks into the rear door of the shop.


CUT TO – Int. Shop


Neo-toad enters shop door, walks towars camera and stop at the office door. Pushes the door open and looks inside.


CUT TO – Int. Office


Neo-toad walks up to chair and grabs the back of it, spins it around and sits in it. He spins so he’s facing the desk and leans back into a relaxed position with his hands behind his head and sighs.


DISSOVE TO – Ext. Space


Boss/Owner in ship enters screen right, crying to himself. He looks around and sobs even harder into his hands.


Radial Wipe In on Boss/Owner face(beat)


CUT



Roll Credits

THE END

Remi
03-29-2008, 01:28 AM
http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1206750508_medium.jpg (http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1206750508_large.jpg)

The first round of concepts for Boss/Owner character.

Remi
03-30-2008, 04:55 AM
http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1206849341_medium.jpg (http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1206849341_large.jpg)

Just an idea, and just beginning so if anyone has some suggestions, now would be the best time. The sign is a placeholder for now. Thanks for looking!!!

Grgeon
03-30-2008, 06:04 AM
Great to see you enter the challenge Ryan! It's looking great.

-George

ivanisavich
03-30-2008, 06:13 AM
Hey Remi best of luck mate!

Remi
03-30-2008, 06:21 AM
Sir Castro, how goes it man? Long time no talk. Perhaps we should catch up with each other again at Sig if you're going. Thanks for having a look. Hope I can get this bad boy done. It's a lot of work and time. I'm super jazzed about this one though. Are you entered?

Tyson, Thanks a ton. I'll have to keep focused, family and work and this, that's something to juggle. I'll get in and have a look at your stuff in the morning tomorrow. I'm sure it'll be great!!! Thanks for looking!!!

Grgeon
03-30-2008, 06:26 AM
Indeed I am. Many say it can't be done, but i'm just gonna have fun trying to make it happen. And seeing you entered gives me a boost to try even harder. Trying to keep pace with Tyson will be fun too ;) I have a reserved thread, but nothing on there yet, so i'm a bit behind already, but i should have something to post soon. I'll catch up with you later buddy.

-George

Remi
04-07-2008, 05:35 AM
http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1207542941_medium.jpg (http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1207542941_large.jpg)

Trying to come up with a look, I guess i'd like it to have a 50's'ish cartoony look. Any feedback is appreciated greatly. I'm going to be adding some bushes in the trees to break it up and some rocks in the water line. I'll throw some junk around the shop and I'd like to populate the hills in the background with some trees as well.

mim-Armand
04-07-2008, 10:42 AM
I agree about '50's'ish cartoony look' too! nice idea and I like it alot! but I preffer some sharpen colors for it, it dosn't look happy enough with these colors;
Btw good way you're going on, goodluck man.

mim,

Remi
04-07-2008, 06:30 PM
Thanks mim, I will work on the colors a bit. I too think it's missing something. Once if fill in some of the dead areas I hope it will look a little better. I will work on it though, thanks for the comments.

Remi
04-09-2008, 06:30 AM
http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1207719053_medium.jpg (http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1207719053_large.jpg)

So i've add some things to the scene and I think i'm going to move on and start on the many other things I need to take care of. Feel free to leave your comments, i'll get to them if I have time. I've gotten some suggestions to make it concrete under the shop and a road/driveway into the shop. I like the idea, but I think I can get by without that for now. If I have the time. I'll add that in. Thanks for looking!!!

adib
04-09-2008, 06:41 AM
Hi there! I like the ideea that you chose a cartoony style.The BG looks cool!Best of luck!:beer:

Remi
04-12-2008, 02:12 AM
http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1207962743_medium.jpg (http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1207962743_large.jpg)

Just the beginning. I'm not really going off of my concept sketch. I've got something else in mind. But i'm going to be adding some details to this here and then working on the head. Any comments are appreciated. Thanks for looking!!!

Thanks adib, I'll try and get some more work done here in a hurry. I've got a potential job coming up, so my time will be limited, but I'm thinking I can get this done in time. Your stuff is looking great as well.:thumbsup:

Cographicz
04-12-2008, 05:37 PM
interesting idea, keep up the good work.

Remi
04-13-2008, 05:59 AM
http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1208062755_medium.jpg (http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1208062755_large.jpg)

Just some more work on him. I'd like to add some more details to him, not too many, anyone have any suggestions? Thanks for looking!!!

Remi
04-13-2008, 10:35 PM
http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1208122506_medium.jpg (http://assets.cgsociety.org/challenge/entries/21/14801/14801_1208122506_large.jpg)

Need to paint some weights and add some details like a keychain later. I'm using a rigging script from
John Doublestein (http://www.johndoublestein.com). Thanks for looking!!!

mim-Armand
04-14-2008, 06:59 AM
Just some more work on him. I'd like to add some more details to him, not too many, anyone have any suggestions? Thanks for looking!!!

What a great Rig, whats that script btw; and about details I'll suggest a pocket in his jacket!

Gl, mim

Wiz
04-14-2008, 02:56 PM
loving the design the character has so much appeal and just looks great!
cants wait to see him move about!

adib
04-14-2008, 03:34 PM
Nice character,and the rig looks great!Keep up the great work!:buttrock:

ankheilw
04-16-2008, 08:21 PM
Hey Remi,

I love the style that you have going. It is minial, but has the possibility for a great deal of emotion.

I do have a suggestion on the environment, though. The Garage exterior that you have looks very 1960's earth. Anything that you can do to increase the visual interest of the environment would only add to the piece, IMO. Even differentiating the trees to look more "alien" or adding stylistic changes to the garage structure to make it look slightly futuristic.

It looks great so far. When are we going to see storyboards / animatic? :)

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