WIP: female head

[Marina]

in general this ok, with this render I cannot tell you much since I cannot appreciate the model well, but I already tell you that I find their nose very straight, its lips seem to have collagen, and the lobe of the ear is very pointed. Apart from this, this brilliant one.


I wait to have been of help, good luck :thumbsup:

[gmask]

It's really hard to judge whta is so wrong about the model looking at it from this view only. Please post a front and side view.

It's okay for a first attempt and as allready mentioned the biggest problem is the lips, then the Nose, the ears and the eyes appear to be too large. You need to be more sensitive to proportions. Even if this was to be a stylized head the proportions it has are not harmonic and convey a sense of goofiness or an oafness.. which I don't think you were intending.

[Aaron]

Thanks for the quick responses. I have to confess, I think my render was a poorly chosen one -- while some of the proportions are off, I think the model is actually more accurate than my render made it look. I've included the orthographic front and side and the perspective front and side, one in wire, one rendered. I've got three days to tweak this, so keep the crits coming =) Meanwhile, I'll be over here tweaking the areas you already mentioned (the earlobe and the texture around the lips for starters). Thanks again.

Peace,
-Aaron.

http://www.angelfire.com/un/aarona/frntvws.jpg

http://www.angelfire.com/un/aarona/sdvws.jpg

[gmask]

The eyes are too large. The jawline and chin need more definition. The lower lip is too fat. The upper lip is not defined well enough.. actually the texture map be the problem more so than the geometry there. The Nose is too long which may also mean that the head is slightly elongated. The bridge of the nose is too sharp. There is not enough definition to the nostrils thus making the nose look like a wedge. The ears stick out too far from the head and the lobes look flattened.

[Aaron]

Here's a quick update before bed; I'll write in the details tomorrow morning (it's about 3:15am local time; I need to sleep).

Gmask, marina - thanks for the crits so far. Keep them coming, if you can spare the time =)

I fixed a bunch of stuff, but it still needs some work. Any thoughts?

http://angelfire.lycos.com/un/aarona/p2ortho.jpg

http://angelfire.lycos.com/un/aarona/p2persp.jpg

Keep the crits coming, they're helping a ton.

BTW - In the future, what's the best format for posting WIP shots for critique? Orthographic or perspective? Flatshaded or textured? Default lighting or final lighting? (Right now I'm using my final lighting, because the model has to be turned in as a single still render, so I need to make sure it looks good in this light, at the very least).

Peace,
-A.

PS - Angelfire is going crazy tonight -- if the images aren't showing, I'll try to find another host tomorrow. Sorry in advance.

[Garma]

the head seems that of a male, with a female face or something... anyway, it's too big. The ears are too small I think.

But, keep going!:thumbsup:

[jellyfish]

I agree, the ears are way too small, and I think the head itself might be too deep for its width. Actually, the head needs to taper in more at the bottom of the back where it meets the neck.

I think the neck needs to move forward a bit.

Also, the jawline isn't at quite the right angle, I think it should be lower than the ear in the back, and more defined for this person.

The lips are still too fat, I think, and perhaps they stick out too much still.

The shape of the eye is good, but it's too large for the face, there's usually a full eye width between the temple (side of head) and the corner of the eye, also an eye width between the eyes.

I think the whole lower jaw would look better and more natural if it was wider, and then the lips might fit better too.

I think the top lip is too round, and needs to be more chisel shaped.

Also, an easy fix is the eyeballs -- they point outward, more than is natural. I know they might "technically" be pointing forward, but the angle of the irises is very important and can be subtle. Try making them more crosseyed (just a tad).

Hope this helps, nice work on the texture of the skin, by the way, and an overall impressive job for your first head!

jellyfish

[celticdog]

her lips look like a carp or something. Life drawing classes helped me enormously with proportion.

[meheekano]

ok brotha you is gettin a poundin in here

get ready for some aftershocks

i think the back end of the skull is to low
and your lips are to low

bring the lips up a bit and the chin and jaw line down

i think everyone covered pretty much everything else
good luck

and feel lucky you got so much feed back

[Aaron]

Thanks for the further crits, gang. I'm going to respond to the crits first, just to let you know where I'm going. But they're an update on the assignment at the bottom -- feel free to jump ahead if you want =)

"ears are way too small... head itself might be too deep for its width... head needs to taper in more at the bottom of the back where it meets the neck."

The ears are definately too small, I'm still working on that bit. I agree about the back of the neck, a bit. Part of the reason for that look is because the model is bald. I need to check my references of bald people (mental note) but I'm pretty sure her neck only needs to come in a little bit at this point. Part of that will be fixed when I add hair (more on that later in the post). As for the head depth, I'm still tweaking that one, too.

"I think the neck needs to move forward a bit."

At the back? Yes. But if the front of the neck comes too far forward it will look terrible and the balance will be ruined.

"Also, the jawline isn't at quite the right angle, I think it should be lower than the ear in the back"

Part of that is the shadow, but you're right, it needs tweaking.

"The lips are still too fat, I think, and perhaps they stick out too much still."

Actually, I think it's the chin that's a problem there, but I do want her to have bigger lips -- just not sure how big I'm willing to leave them. More tweaking to come.

"[the eye is] too large for the face, there's usually a full eye width between the temple (side of head) and the corner of the eye, also an eye width between the eyes."

I have to disagree with that one -- I think the eye is about right in the perspective views -- I should probably show a perspective shot from the front; I will when I get the chance. I'll check it a bit more, but I just can't see those as getting smaller.

"the whole lower jaw would look better ... if it was wider"

I agree, I'll have to try that out.

"Also, an easy fix is the eyeballs"

Yeah, they'll be rigged to an aim constraint soon enough so I can point them wherever I want to =) I just want to finish the head first.

"her lips look like a carp or something. Life drawing classes helped me enormously with proportion"

The lips are partially a texture problem -- my spec colour map is throwing it all to hell. Still working on that one. As for life drawing classes, they helped me too, and they still help, but my proportion problems are more of a sculptural problem than anything else. It's also from my unfamiliarity of 3d modeling -- this is my first non-tutorial model. I won't make excuses; the proportions are indeed off, but it's not for lack of drawing: here are 2 examples of my lifedrawing. They're a bit old, as my new stuff hasn't been scanned yet, but it's pretty much where I'm at right now.


double self-portrait sketch (ignore the colours, bad scan; 106k) (http://angelfire.lycos.com/un/aarona/portrait03.jpg)
figure study (better scan; 104k) (http://angelfire.lycos.com/un/aarona/figure04.jpg)

"back end of the skull is to low ... lips are to low ... bring the lips up ... chin and jaw line down..."

I agree with you up to the point about the jawline and the chin. I'm going to tweak those a bit before I go on, but I think once the lips and skull positions are fixed, it should look a little better with regards the chin. Dropping the chin any further will lead to bigger problems with the length of the head. The jawline is about where I want it, but I agree, it needs some tweaking.

"brotha you is gettin a poundin in here"

I wouldn't have asked for the feedback if I didn't want it. Brutal criticism is fine by me, as long as it's right. If it's not, then it's just as worthless as over-kind criticism. Either way, all I asked for were honest crits, and I got them.

--------------

Ok, now, about the assignment: this head model is still due on Monday, but now I have to do a run/walk cycle as well -- due Monday the 12th. So now I have to model, texture, rig, and animate this thing in less than 2 weeks. I've never modeled a human character before, never rigged a model before, and never animated a human character (in any program) before. I'll have to learn -- so I'm only allotting one more day to tweaking the head and then I have to get started on learning to model/rig/animate a human. However, I appreciate the crits, and I'll keep tweaking the model over the summer, so keep them coming.

Peace,
-A.

[CGTalk Moderation]

This thread has been automatically closed as it remained inactive for 12 months. If you wish to continue the discussion, please create a new thread in the appropriate forum.