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DKole
12-24-2007, 06:42 AM
Hello all,

First time poster here. I'm working on a dialogue, and I'd very much appreciate any criticism and advice you can offer. I haven't added the lip-sync yet, just some facial expressions.

Here's the link:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=49lfgXuJcFQ

[Update: Newer version here:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=7hjSaeAiONg ]

[Update: Another pass to add in the lip-sync
http://youtube.com/watch?v=3HMalNOO5cM (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3HMalNOO5cM) ]

[Update: Tweaked the lip sync and some of the timing and motion. Opened up his stance during the middle section.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=R4WuRjSqTmU ]


Thanks for your time!

-Daniel

Kid-Mesh
12-27-2007, 02:23 AM
Looks good up to "I have no bush". That motion with the arm doesnt really read well during that line.

I really like the beginning though. Have you tried acting this out yourself?

DKole
12-27-2007, 03:21 AM
Thanks for the reply. I did act it out before and during the blocking phase, but as I got into it I found that I hadn't grasped the timing as well as I'd thought. I had to start swapping in and out different ideas, and I think I've gotten bogged down some.

I'll work on the motion you mentioned. As I was acting the lines out, my natural inclination was to nearly repeat the "I have no bird" motion with the opposite arm, and with a slight variation in direction. Worrying about being repetitive, I dropped that early on and went with what you see now. I'll keep at it and post an update soon.

Thanks again!


-Daniel

DKole
12-28-2007, 03:17 AM
Trying something different for "I have no bush." Again, all comments are appreciated.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=7hjSaeAiONg

[New version linked in the first post]

-Daniel

DKole
12-30-2007, 11:24 PM
I occurs to me that when I've been editing updates into the first post, the thread itself doesn't appear updated on the forum index.

So this post is just to point out the latest version. Here's a link to it, and I've added the link to the first post as well.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=R4WuRjSqTmU


-Daniel

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12-30-2007, 11:24 PM
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