Thief in the Labyrinthine Garden (need hard critique!)

[matiasmorrison]

Some amazing smoke effects!!! :thumbsup:
Is it really all 2D? It really looks like rendered / textured & then photoshop'd...
Nice!
_________________
Matías

[PMichaud]

Yes, I modelled the maze and bits of the tower in 3ds max, but I didn't texture it there, I just used it as a base for shading etc. Thanks for the feedback (not as rough as I wanted though, where's the venom??)

[CybrGfx]

Well, okay, since you asked...

The horizon line is crooked. From the general perspective, with the distance you are attempting to display, one can almost see the curve of the planet. It should look ever so gently curved, with the rising mountains on the RH side minimized a bit.
Your Light Source is wonky. You show a strong directional, lower in the sky, to illuminate the heart and the weird potholder maze beneath it, but then show inconsistent lighting for everything else. What IS your Light source? At present, it looks like the mist is generating light onto the ground, and the moon/planet is shining to the heart/potholder. Establish a time of day, additionally. Morning? Late Afternoon? If you have more than one Light Source (a dual-sun type situation), you will have to clearly differentiate between them, so that it doesn't look like there is some hidden sun the viewer can't see that is lighting up the place, while that glowing moon (which shows its Light Source as coming from underneath the horizon line, illuminating it from the bottom) is illuminating only the heart.
The proportion of your ground texture bricks is too contrived and unbelievable with the potholder on top of it. Without that, though, it is quite intriguing, and pretty realistic looking.
The town in the distance, and the fields in the far distance beneath all that glowing fog, look like you've stuck a landscape photo behind the painting you've done from the middle, down. The entire landscape, to the horizon, should be showing this type of texturing, except for the colonized areas. Trying to hide it behind fog won't cut it except for anyone that doesn't look too closely.
Too many stars in the sky.
Too much green. You should add some rivers, which would help explain how there is enough moisture for everything to be so green (but you still need to vary that green with bits of yellow and brown (at a very low opacity to gently tint, not color), to look a bit more believable. Even in the Amazon forest, the greens are not all so monochromatic.
Back to that potholder. The maze pattern looks too haphazard, but not enough so to consider the maze abandoned, or derelict, as much as poorly rendered. This actually relates to the potholder in its entirety. The edges of it are all wavey and wobbly, and the way you've rendered the shadows makes it look like it is hovering a couple hundred feet off the ground. Although it is a different green, the texture on it looks like AstroTurf, and it does not blend in with the rest of the image as you have it.
You have a really good basic concept here, but it is a bit too busy. Hone in on your main focal point (the part that is telling the story ~ I assume it is the heart and the maze), and eliminate the excess clutter of the stars, the overly dense fog, the too uniform green, and the over-brightness of the moon. If that moon IS your main Light Source, work on making the scene lighting consistently reflect (get it? reflect? Light Source? I made a funny. Smile, or I'll type it again! ;)) that lighting in order to help set the mood of this image.

Hope this wasn't too painful, and that it helps you some.

P.S. ~ Where's the "Thief???" At this size resolution, he/it better be HUGE to make any noticeable presence in a planetary-sized landscape...

[matiasmorrison]

Well not Venom, but constructive criticism...
I like the drawing in general, so I won't criticize it by it's shape.
But I'd add some more of those tiki torches arround & inside the Labyrinthine Garden... and since it looks like you're good with the smoke effect, why not some lightning & shading from those torches?
also...have you thought about widen a little the labyrinth halls?

Hope this was poisoning enough...:twisted:
________________________
Matías

[PMichaud]

Thanks a lot guys, that's exactly the feedback I was looking for, I really appreciate it. Do you know of any resources on lighting, because I think I need help with that bit -- I get what you're saying, but I'm not sure how to improve it. I'll post what I come up with.

There is a companion poem that goes with this that sort of explains what's going on, but in a nutshell, the blue moonlight is the "thief" -- the poem starts: "Like a thief into the labyrinthine garden stole a ray of light..."

[CybrGfx]

The poem explains the concept beautifully, but you will need to do some tweaking to have the image fit the poem...

Here is some reading about Light Sources:
http://painting.about.com/od/landscapes/ss/lightdirection.htm
http://www.neadeenmasters.com/Light%20Source.htm
http://www.wetcanvas.com/ArtSchool/StudioTips/PaintingFromPhotos/Lesson3/index.html
http://www.schellingsdesigns.com/tutorial.htm
http://www.dummies.com/WileyCDA/DummiesArticle/id-1740.html

Also check out the video here (http://www.pixelcorps.com/info.php), titled "Drawing and Light - Iain McCaig

Start looking around you at the light source, indoors or out, and how it shines onto objects. Half of good art is the ability to observe.
Look at some Google Images of Ireland, or type in an Image search for "green mountains," and look at how the sunlight is on them at various times of the day.

This looks to become one of those awesome fantasy images when you're all done.

[beetz15s]

I really do not want to repeat much of what was already said. You have a good start but I believe you can bring your camera and angle a bit lower to the ground. It also will also make the landscape look larger. You should look into adding more randomization to the ground texture and geometry. And remember not to anything without reference. Its a good start just keep at it and it will eventually come together :) gl

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