Character: Lulu - the lockergirl

[[DSmod]Tweak]

I'm downloading them now, I will give some C&C in about 10 minutes! (If it's needed);)

[[DSmod]Tweak]

Ok wow, that's all I have to say is wow. The amount of detail put into this piece is just AMAZING! man you have some priceless talent. good job man goooooood job

[Heaven871]

Thanks [DSmod]Tweak. I really hope you are not a student at my university. If you are, "Schmor in der Hölle" :wip:

But I guess you are not. So, THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANK you. You can not imagine how much pain, tears, energy, life, happiness, sadness and fun went into this short.

I just can't keep my mouth shut about my next project, but stay tuned, it will blast some things biiig time away. This time it will also be photorealistic.

Thanks again for the reply, wish you all the luck I can spend.

[Psycholink]

Coool :D

:bounce: :applause:

[Heaven871]

http://www.garryrunke.com/lulu/pics/mangler_wire.jpg

Here is one of these famous semi wire/rendered pics. Maybe you like it :applause:
All the cables and wires are even in wireframe mode just solid black. A nice polygon count I achieved.

1.216.224 triangles in this scene.
1.336.288 triangles in the maincore elevator scene.

I swear it will be less in the future. I learned that lesson.

[ThirdEye]

Spend 2 minutes to read the forum rules, i changed the title for you :rolleyes:

[Heaven871]

I don't know what kind of weird wackos are around here, but Lulu is a short.

SHORT = a not so very long movie

But I don't give a ****, do as you wish, as the SHORT tells:
Follow the rules, miss your life.
:wip: <- doesn't that cute guy look like a butcher?

I still love you. Life is so much fun.

[leigh]

Heaven871 - rules are rules, and you are lucky that we didn't nuke your thread when the rules are very strict in this forum.
You should also have better manners - especially towards a moderator.

Next time, less cheekiness, and just abide by the rules, okay? Or else you won't have a thread next time.

[E.Z. Schwartz]

Congradulations on finishing it, but uh... what was it about? It was pretty incoherent. Maybe if I was able to read the note on the paper in the begining it would have made sence? Anyhow, good job, I know it's hard to finish something like this.

[DZL]

i totally dug the environments, but the animation is a bit herky-jerky for me. the doors move much too fast, the floating ball moves erratically, and the walk cycle is very odd, to say the least.

that being said, i like your camera moves and how you cut from scene to scene.

i'd also spend a little more time lighting your scenes - the whole environment was way too dark - some of the close-ups on the face just didn't look like they were lit right. try using more ambient light or go to a GI setup...

[robinson]

Originally posted by mattconway
i totally dug the environments, but the animation is a bit herky-jerky for me. the doors move much too fast, the floating ball moves erratically, and the walk cycle is very odd, to say the least.

that being said, i like your camera moves and how you cut from scene to scene.

i'd also spend a little more time lighting your scenes - the whole environment was way too dark - some of the close-ups on the face just didn't look like they were lit right. try using more ambient light or go to a GI setup...

I would say the same !!!
Aber was sollte der „schmor in der Hölle“ quatsch denn eigentlich ???
:thumbsdow

[Heaven871]

Ahhhh. My heart is bleeding. Please no discussion in this thread, it's about Lulu the short, not about me.

I didn't meant to insult anybody, I didn't meant to be unpolite.

I stick to the rules and just want you to watch and comment the short. This thread is not about me or simple minded fools.

Pleasse. Stop it. There is so much arrogance in this world. Don't let it invade this beautiful thread.

:wavey:

And "robinson" don't take life that serious and I am sure you'll get the point if you read the "schmor in der Hölle" piece again. Just put a smile on your lips. :thumbsup:

[ManuelM]

garry, du frechdachs :shame:

[robinson]

Wo kommen die janzen Berliner hier denn eigentlich plötzlich her ???
:beer: :beer: :beer:

[ManuelM]

das frage ich mich auch langsam.
berlin - die 3D-haupstadt. nur leider ganz ohne 3D-companys.;) oder kennst du welche ?

[robinson]

Originally posted by Manuel M
das frage ich mich auch langsam.
berlin - die 3D-haupstadt. nur leider ganz ohne 3D-companys.;) oder kennst du welche ?

Companys in Berlin ? :hmm:
Sollen sich hier echt welche versteckt haben ? :hmm:
Ein paar kleine soll es geben, sollten sich mal zu erkennen geben.
Bin leider auch freelancer und versuch halt davon zu leben. :annoyed:

Mir kommt es allerdings so vor als ob hier nur Germanfilmschool leute sind...
Wie kann man sich das denn eigentlich leisten, hoffe es lohn sich !!!

[PiNs]

Help - He gave me a porn name! LOL!

[ManuelM]

hoffe es lohn sich !!!

:shrug: :shrug: :shrug: :shrug: :shrug: :shrug:

[kentoyam]

He Heavenwatweissich,

big up for your representation in this thread

:buttrock:

keep it real!!!!

search and destroy:wip: :wip: :wip: :wip: :wip: :wip: :wip:


Word.

[road]

Uh ....

I have no idea what the was about....

The animation on the character was super stiff and jerky...

[xynaria]

There's a few shots that work really well as camera shots for me, but the 'story' doesn't read well and the animation doesn't do anyone any favours..sorry. :)

[malkavian2003]

its amazing how much work went into the background enviroments, yet the main char is ...well... lame. it made me laugh, im sorry but hey. the enviroments are great. thats is the best thing to come out of this piece.

[Heaven871]

Now Lulu is finished for about a week, and I allready have enough of it.

One might say it was a waste of time, but I learned so many things, and believe it or not, I love my short, my character AND the animations. I know how "ugly" you might think they are, but they all have character.
But I thank you very much for posting so many critics, it's the only way I can improve my work, and yeah, next time it will be totally mainstream.

Today it's saturday, the sun is shining, my ant colony struggles for survival and my RC car is broken, ahh, I love my life.
And because this day is so aweful I'll brighten your day by writing a guide for Lulu :bounce:


The setting: Lulus girlfriend (yeah, she is a lesbian) has enough of getting mangled. So she asks Lulu to jump in. Lulu has no idea what awaits her.

The Lockerroom: When Lulu opens the locker she finds a puppet hanging in there. It's from the short "Why knot" by Tobias Wiegand, will be uploaded soon, I guess. And a picture of a .. hmm .. furry little animal (german "Hamster") .. it's from the short "Hamster" by Thomas Bittner.
The paper she holds in her hands reads: "Thanks for doing my job for a day. You'll do it. Oh, and please, never ever touch my biosphere."

Maincore: When the camera moves out of the elevator down to the generator. The yellow line reads "Work in progress". It is a work in progress, but here at THE GERMAN FILM SCHOOL (that's how it's correctly written, in capitols :rolleyes: ) there is also twice a year a party where our work is shown, called "Work in progress". (Hey "robinson" I am sure we can arrange it so you can visit us next time, if you like.)
When Lulu walks behind the wall the other person is one of these really funny people and sticks a piece of paper at her back that reads "Kick me", you may know these kind of high school jokes.
When she first tries to spit down, the sphere (a guardian) stops her. But she fools the sphere and manages to spit down, it should decide her fate later on.

Gang of Glory: The generator in the water is protected by a glass shield that reads "Do not touch the glass". Lulu doesn't care, or notice it and touches the glass. The sphere reminds her of the rules. At the same time, while getting knocked out, the paper from her back falls down and she reads it. Now she is really angry.

The Mangler: The inmost cave. Lulu is in a life or death situation because she is not prepared for that weird machine. She also destroys the most important thing of her girlfriend. The biosphere (the little plant in glass, thingie).
Having enough of the horror she wants to push the "emergency stop" button, but, she spit on the work in progress generator, and her spit now produces a short circuit, which prevents the emergency button from working properly.
Lulu recognizing, that's it, the camera moves out of her world into another very disturbing place. You might say it's a room full of VCRs, but what you see is just the begging of total chaos. Mua ha ha ha. Just kidding, it should show that Lulu is IN such a VCR and that the whole situation is very weird, and we are no longer in the REAL world.
In the meantime we have total chaos and Lulu destroyed everything. But in total destruction lies always the birth of something new (yeah, George, think about it, doesn't have to be something good).
The little flower feels Lulus pure heart and flowers again.

Moral: Hmm. Hard one. It's not good to follow all the rules you are forced to. If you don't, life will be harder and you get punished all the time. But in the end, something will happen, if it's good or bad is up to you.

Weew. Couldn't write that much about many many hollywood movies :D

Greeting to the german film school (haha, wrote it in small letters) and to all you great guys. You sure havn't wasted your time in supporting this thread.

Hmm, hope I didn't write toooo much.

[aDiaNDi]

gibt nicht nur berliner hier :D auch hamburger ;)

sieht gut aus!

[DZL]

fine - you may like the short, and you should - its yours. this board is for posting finished work, and getting constructive criticism, which is exactly what you got. I'll never understand why people post work, have it criticized, then get their panties in a bunch when people give them CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. It will only help you in the future. When you get a job outside of school, you will get this criticism every day. Best learn to deal with it now.

[Heaven871]

And it's people like you that can get the h*** out of this thread. If you can't read, why do you post?

But I thank you very much for posting so many critics, it's the only way I can improve my work, and yeah, next time it will be totally mainstream.

Maybe you took it for beeing cynical, but if I thank someone, it means, THANK YOU!
And if I always have to hear the same stupid questions about why is what the way it is, and they are questions that mean:"Oh my god, I have to think." I will produce a nice little short that everyone understands, and noone has to think, easy as that. Mainstream.

These questions did NOT came from THIS thread !!! Here are just cool people that really really helped me. Except people like "mattconway", diss to you.

[Goon]

I know you didnt want this thread to be about you but you are being a bit of a jerk. Just calm down. You seem on a couple of occasions to have mixed up constructive criticism that doesnt say positive things with negative slamming.

Not to disrespect all the hard work that you put into this but i did not like it. The environments were nice, some of the animation good, and the story had potential.
But it doesnt really work well. Your story seems to have a few insider jokes and details that are not readily apparent to the viewer.
Like the note being stuck on her back. I couldnt see any of that animation because she was behind a wall. I personally assumed she was talking to a door or robot with a personality chip or something. You tried to explain this by telling rather than showing: "Hey dont touch my back". Personally that didnt work for me. Then later i couldnt see the note well enough to read it, so the connection was never made. And why does this have any importance to the story. Her behaviour doesnt change, she was messing the place up before and being angry at a co-worker doesnt seem to amplify her efforts.
Also the bank of VCRs. How does this make a connection to it all not being real? I realize you pulled in and out of the "fake" scene with camera movement but because it goes to black then brings in the scene it seems more like a cut and removes any relation to the scene. The matrix does something similar, however they have their green binary thing to tie it all together. Because of this lack of relation i have a hard time, even after you have said it is there, making that connection. Plus there is the fact that it has no important relation to the story. So what if it is all fake, you havent done anything with the outsider world so it doesnt matter.
Then the flower. I can see where you were going with this but having it come back to life on account of her pure heart seems strange. She doesnt come across as remorseful for what she has done.
To say that because something is mainstream and that we dont get it because we arent thinking enough might have some merit, but it also ignores any failings between what you concieved and what you produced.

Animation:
Her joints for her knees seem really far down, this doesnt help her walk cycle at all. Is this a stylistic choice? Shes a humanoid so without greater stylization it will be assumed that she is messed up not different.
When first entering the elevator she jolts back in shock. Why? Is this her first time in the place.
She scream twice. Only one is a motivated scream, while the first just seems to happen. Her killing the flower isnt sufficient reason for such a reaction.

[santiago]

crazy germans

[xynaria]

Thank you for your explanation.....however I've just watched the film again and it only highlights what is not coming over in the film. I really haven't the time or energy at the moment to go through a point by point discussion on this but you can put over the most elaborate ideas via film, or you can fail to even make a simple point whether hollywood or not. Most of your 'plot points; are simply not reading....maybe you know your story so well that you forgot to actually tell it, something even experienced film makers often do.

Again.. to you your animation reads as characterful, but to me, just awkward, inarticulate and poor. That's only my opinion but the purpose (in theory) of these boards is just so we can get a reading of our work. I don't get any sense that you appreciate anyones view of your work if it is critical, so one could easily say.. why exhibit it. That criticism is not because in your blind arrogance you feel you are requiring people to think, but simply because the piece isn't communicating and no amount of thinking on the part of the viewer is going to solve that.:)

[Heaven871]

29 replies, 2996 views. Thanks for beeing part of this great experiment.

You are all right in everything you all said. But do you really think my short would have been watched that many times without starting this horrible threat ?

I don't think so :applause:

It was just a big fake. If you are angry now, I am sorry for that, I really am.

Wish you all the best for your future life. Enjoy it with all your heart. Don't waste your life. :p

[Goon]

So you create a rather bad short and have people watch by pissing them off?
Your messed up man.

[erik2003]

Man this sucks.

I appreciate the animation, even if i have crits - lots of work went in that i'm sure.

I definitely don't appreciate the attitude. If you want no criticism show the thing to your grandma.

[ThirdEye]

This thread will be closed in a short while imo... :rolleyes: