Sci-Fi Horror Epic - Human-Machine Warfare

[ivanisavich]

Hi there,

Well I downloaded the full 140 megs so I guess I owe you a critique! I'll warn you ahead of time though that it's going to be a bit harsh ;)

First of all, the good things:

1) Some of the models looked nice, and although they did look pretty generic (ie, the man/woman heads, the robots etc), they were impressive nonetheless. I know how hard it can be to model stuff...and you sure have modelled a lot of stuff for this video...so you get full credit in that deparment.

2) The particle effects at the beginning, and the blocky particles at the end looked nice.

3) There's certainly a lot of stuff going on! So I'll give you credit for the hard work you appear to have put into this :)

The bad things:

1) For the most part, it appeared to be extremely incorherent, and I couldn't tell what was going on....there didn't appear to be any sort of storyline, and there were many shots which were apparantly unrelated to the other parts of the film (the floating electricity blocks, the particle swarm at the beginning etc)

2) For such a massive undertaking (ie...there were certainly a lot of shots!) the animation was extremely weak. There was no apparant facial animation on any of the characters, the legs on the mechanical walker locked a few times, the walk-cycles appeared to be very generic and stiff, the camera motion was really unfocused, the character's body motions were seemingly random in a couple of shots...etc etc

3) The content is pretty weak as well.....there were seemingly endless shots with the one machine dude shooting in random directions, lots of other seemingly random stuff thrown in....it just didn't make sense from a short film previs standpoint....and I'm not sure how you could extrapolate a live action film from this, although I do realize you mentioned that this also functions somewhat as a demoreel, so I'll give you credit in that area.

4) Overall, it didn't make much sense...it was hard to tell what was going on, the animation was weak....it really didn't interest me at all, and I had no idea what was going on the whole time.


Hopefully though, since this animation is a year old as you say, you've worked out a lot of those bugs by now :)

[Stifter]

Thanks Tyson for the complements and constructive criticism. Hearing it from a different point of view helps.
Looking at it again I do see the flaws , which is everything in my critical eye. I am a hard worker and in time im sure it will pay off. Right now I work as a video editor and im slowing building contacts in the movie industry. I intend to be doing this for a very long time ..if 30 years down the road your still in the game ..well...I think we all have a pretty good sense of what the future has in store. I dont even think CGI software and computer hardware will be capable of making the story I wrote until we are working on tera flop machines. And the story itself.. I thought about recording a voice-over and text overlays ..but I can't give away even a fraction of my story. I have not yet mailed it to the Library of Congress to have it copywrited. As of now im just waiting for Zbrush 3 and in the mean time will be working on a 20 second fight scene.

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