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View Full Version : Beam-Hop animation needing crit


travishowe
12-19-2006, 01:03 AM
Hey Everyone,
I've started an animation that still needs a great deal of work, but before I move on I was hoping to get some crits.

www.useyourpower.com/Lt_Dan_balance_v05.avi (http://www.useyourpower.com/Lt_Dan_balance_v05.avi)

I should also ad: no I'm not enrolled in Animation Mentor. I have seen a few demo reels that featured this test and thought it was a great exersize.

Thanks for your time!

Travis

denil
12-19-2006, 09:20 AM
fter the 1st jump, the stutterin doesn't seem natural, doesn't fit in.... also when he lands on the last pole it feels a bit stiff there.... the way he finishes the jump... the flow is not proper... everything has some kind if stiffness....

travishowe
12-20-2006, 03:37 AM
Hey Denil,
Thank you very much for your comments, they were very helpful. Here's the latest verision:

www.useyourpower.com/Lt_Dan_Balance_v06.avi

Thanks again!


Travis

chlywly
12-20-2006, 04:13 AM
Timing is getting there, but you need to pay attention to your center of gravity, also overlap, I'm not seeing very much... its really important, to keep your character from seeing rigid.

3dsensei
12-20-2006, 08:18 AM
hehehe,:bounce:
I like it, the idea is great. I love the acting in the first part, thats reading really strong, really good. But the acting in the last part, is not that god, especialy the kick, it doesn't work, I'm not sure if it's the timing or if the movement just doen't work in this case. Try to let him stand up before he kicks, or maybe considere to take the kicking out, also try to hold the foot back just a little more, before the kick comes. There's also something about the jump where he lands on his head, is it becouse he falls forward, or is simply becouse he jumps on his head? And after his head bounce:) he comes up higher than the initial jump, it looks a bit weird, maybe he shouldn't bounce so high, or the initial jump should be higher.
You got some good squash and strech in the body, but it seems like you forget to do it in the legs, they are very stif.
And as chlywly says, you need a lot more overlapping.

Hope it helps. :thumbsup:

travishowe
12-20-2006, 09:36 PM
Hey everyone,
thank you for your critiques! They've helped immensly. You mentioned needing a better center of gravity, could you give me an example of where it's most problematic?

I've made quite a few adjustments, tho I haven't yet gotten to the kick at the end (I agree with you, and I will, just trying to take it in sections).

www.useyourpower.com/Lt_Dan_Balance_v08.mov

Thanks again! Looking forward to your thoughts!

Travis

travishowe
12-23-2006, 02:08 AM
I've had some time to really clean up the scene. I've removed a few things (the breathing at the end and the third look over the edge at the beginning), and I've added a lot of breathing holds. Thank you all again for your advice, it has helped immensely

Presenting the (hopefully) finished version of Lt. Dan's Beam Hop:

www.useyourpower.com/Lt_Dan_Balance_v10.avi

Enjoy (and feel free to rip it appart, I'm up for more crits :)

+ |2 4 \| ! 5

mistasam02
12-24-2006, 11:13 PM
hey! travis howe! you dont know me but im from expression too! i came to that "class 42 day" you guys had.. so questions: how'd your experience after graduation work out? how was the job hunt? any suggestions for a fellow animator in training? if you can, i'd love to talk! (mistasam@gmail.com (http://forums.cgsociety.org/mistasam@gmail.com))

now back on topic.. in your animation, when he comes back from the first look-over, i expected him to wobble a lil more back and forth when he settles. the 2nd job needs more anticipation.. he kinda just steadied himself and just went right into it, as opposed to a build-up beforehand. thats the same feeling i'm getting with the bounce too. the ending looks awesome though! lookin forward to updates! :D

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12-24-2006, 11:13 PM
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