View Full Version : Biker Girl / the escape -Concept WIP
MrFreeman 08-16-2006, 01:26 PM Hi all you creatives out there.. :bounce:
I don't normally get a chance to post work, but this is something I've been working on for several nights and wanted some constructive feedback about how I could improve the image.
I sometimes feel that I've over complicated a composition and it starts to get messy...
I also didn't have much reference with regards to anatomy, so anything that looks really wrong - let me know :hmm:
I've also posted my original sketch so you can see how this has developed.
feed back very welcome!
http://www.pixelsandpotions.com/images/biker.021.jpg
http://www.pixelsandpotions.com/images/biker.001.jpg
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Squibbit
08-16-2006, 02:03 PM
yo freeman , nice to see ya, i'll drop by with some crits later :)
.
MrFreeman
08-16-2006, 02:41 PM
:thumbsup: he he he good to hear from you squibbit
I look forward to hearing from you later - :) :)
Shadowbrooke
08-16-2006, 02:49 PM
First of all, her bike looks amazing! I love the rain as well. I only have one crit is that her arms (look ok in the sketch. For the one that's holding the gun, it seems to be crooked around the wrist bracelet. The bracelet looks like it was on too tight and could cut circulation. That's only what I noticed so far. But very very impressive work!! :thumbsup:
excellent work.
i think she needs to add more tension to the muscles since the bike just moved so she has to hold firm so that she won't thrown off . I think the arms should be alittle more thicker.
and her emotions aren't quite obvious yet , and , she is pointing the gun at a direction ,yet, she looks at another direciton.and i think her right eyebrow is kinda off.
great work again.
frostblade
08-16-2006, 06:12 PM
Cool bike design!
I think other than the arms needing more muscle definition, you really need to work on the chest and shoulders, leg and foot (this part is not as dynamic and suiting to the scene...her leg looks a bit limp). All these details give the image more depth and the character more power and so on so it's pretty important.
btw the bangles are going to mess up how the arms are going to be rendered... because the gun holding arm looks like it's in the process of being chopped off and about to slide off by this metalic object. Maybe a tatoo would be better for decoration?
Might also want to add some more space above the gun for composition.
MrFreeman
08-16-2006, 07:11 PM
:thumbsup: Thanks Kelandra
I'll concentrate on sorting out the arm and hand...
:bounce: Cheers MSB - Originally, I intended for her to be holding the gun ready, rather than aiming. Maybe it would be better if she was aiming to right of screen.. I agree about the emotion - something I need to work on. - I suppose that when I started this, I was more interested in bike designs and then got a little carried away, so need to think a little more about where I'm heading...
:thumbsup: Thanks Frostblade ...great advice which i will definitely be using - more updates soon :)
beelow
08-16-2006, 07:28 PM
Interesting composition dude! There are minor things that have been metioned all ready, as for ne thing else I don't notice, keep it up dude! See ya around!:thumbsup:
MrFreeman
08-16-2006, 09:11 PM
Hi Beelow
Good to see you are still around - thanks for the comments / advice
Hope to post an update soon.... see you in the next challenge if not before :bounce: :thumbsup:
TimonQ
08-17-2006, 02:56 AM
I'm wondering a bit where that light is coming from. The composition seems alright. I'd think the tops of the skyscrapers would be getting into fog/clouds, though, not sure how that would effect the look though, it's fairly lucent right now.
As for emotion, I'm feeling it a lot more in the sketch. She looks kind of pissed off, like as if she's about to go off to bust some caps but someone offscreen is being all wimpy and telling her not to but she doesn't want to hear it.
Also, is that water coming down the front of the bike? It looks a bit thick, more like string. Looking at the other water streams that seems to be just due to the style your using, which is fine, but for some reason the front one stood out me more. I think it's the way it bends back forward near the ground... thought it was an electrical thing at first, maybe it is! It's hard to tell right now.
MrFreeman
08-17-2006, 08:39 AM
:) Thanks for your comments TimonQ....
It's thiese sort of comments that will really help get this working...
Some great points and I'll look at these as soon as I get a chance and post an update soon :) :)
notpill
08-17-2006, 11:59 AM
Hi Dave, cool painting! i like so much the old style of the charachter (it remember me "sky captain" movie ).
I think theres a couple of little things to fix on the anathomy and the perspective (here s a lil paintover,hoping you dont mind:))
http://www.giulianobrocani.com/PVT/freeman_po.gif
Here you can see the complete process with grids and bounding boxes: animated gif (http://www.giulianobrocani.com/PVT/freeman_po2.gif)
MrFreeman
08-17-2006, 03:45 PM
:) Cheers notpill
Good paintover - especially some of the anatomy
I was quite careful with the perspective, but maybe it's been lost a bit as I've worked into the image. Thanks a lot for your help and I'll post an update sometime tonight :) :)
frostblade
08-17-2006, 04:11 PM
I was kinda looking at your picture again and here's my quick paintover suggestion with the arms positions. Just a bit more body language.
http://img112.imageshack.us/img112/7923/armsls8.jpg
MrFreeman
09-05-2006, 10:49 AM
Here's an update at long long last. Sorry for the delay, but a job got in the way.
I've added more clothing to the girl and extended the composition to show the city above. Still more to do, but it's beginning to make a bit more sense . Comments are always welcome. :)
MrFreeman
09-05-2006, 11:00 AM
oooops... here is the image in full (latest update not as a thumbnail) :)
http://www.pixelsandpotions.com/images/bikernew.044.jpg
walrus
09-05-2006, 02:44 PM
David -
Good to see new work from you. This is starting out to be a really interesting piece. Great "bike" deisgn, and rainy atmosphere. And I like how you've extended the canvas higher on the top.
I'm not sure that all the architecture on the top is working with your perspective just yet. You may want to go check those perspective guidelines again: Many of the horizontal (diagonal) lines don't look parallel to each other. Those three bridges in the center especially look like they are all crooked compared to each other.
The woman's lower leg feels a bit long to me, but more importantly, all her limbs feel too tubular. Like they are simple cylenders without the subtle musculature underneath. I'm sure it's because you're still refining them, but once you get there, some more subtle curves might really make them flow better.
Also, after the above refinements are done, the bike and the ground in the picture look wonderfully wet, but the buildings and the woman don't. But I know you'll get there.
Good luck, can't wait to see more!
-mike
MrFreeman
09-05-2006, 03:23 PM
:) Hi Mike
Thanks for your advice. I'll definitely look at the girls lower leg and limbs as i think you are probably right about length and shape.
The perspective should be pretty much correct - but I'll check later. The bridges are not supposed to be parallel as they are at varying angles - if this isn't clear, I might change.
oohps. I haven't added the rain yet, but will do so soon.
Should keep me busy tonight!! Thanks again Mike
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