My very first WIP post... any help is greatly appreciate!

[RichVisual]

I would suggest as your using photoshop to utalise layers so you can add some detail to the ground - pepples, rocks, cracks, and dust plumes etc.
Also horses head (white) looks a little small in proportion to the body and maybe the legs need to be more slender. basically proportion and detail - more of

[eishiya]

Even though this is in an early stage, it already has a nice atmosphere - good job. The only thing that bugs me is the perspective. The black horse and the guy on it are too small. The castle in the background also looks a bit small, but there I can't be sure. The castle is a bit too dark, though, I think you should put some sandy air between the castle and the viewer.

Edit: I just noticed that the torso of the guy on the white horse is too short. Also, the way he is sitting makes him look like he has no groin.

[Stopato]

As already mentioned, the perspective and proportions need some ajustments.
Its seems the knight is sitting too close to the horse´s neck too.
One more thing, in my opinion very important, is the feel of the image, it would be cool to put some more drama on the scene, I don´t know if it was your intention but the guy on the front seems not to care about the guy on the back who seems to be challenging him or something.
that´s it^^
Hope I cool help
(I need to say that for a sketch its waaay better than mine ones ....hehe)

[MasterPete]

When you guys mention the perspective and proportion, it does look wrong :eek: ! The white knight's groin (if he has any...) is so so wrong. I'm amaze I missed that.

I'll definately work on it harder.

With the drama, I think I'll improve the expression on both the white horse and the guy riding it.

Thank you for the comments! I'm hoping I could post the next version before the end of the week...

(By the way, Stopato, it probably looks like a sketch for you but this is actually my best :D ... so anything you put up would probably be miles better than mine.)

[RalphDamiani]

There's a nice set up already. What distracts me the most there is what's been said already: The knight is sitting too close to the horse's neck. With that fixed the image will improve 100% already. Hope it helps. =)

[MasterPete]

@RalphD : Thanks for the comment :)


I'm fixing the Knight piece at the moment but I have to create 2 illustrations. You guys are so helpful and, if it's not much trouble, can I ask for a bit of help for my other idea as well?

This is illustration for the retro-"Little Red Riding Hood" where at the end the little girl pull out an automatic and shoot the wolf instead. The moral of the story is "Girls are not so trusty these days..."

This is done in Photoshop alone, again, and there's still tone of things to clean up... but everything else is there...

http://www.bluebuster.net/picture/redhood.jpg

Thank you for your time :)

[Myku]

Lol. Great idea! I think this one looks like a lot of fun. As for crits: I would say that you might want to tone-down the light coming from the doorway a little- it's dramatic, but it's also a little distracting IMHO. I would make the room darker too, and it might also help if you were to go ahead and add more detail/contrast to the wolf's paw and the object that it's hanging over since these things are very close to the viewer (even if your intention is to blur the foreground and lead the eye directly to Red Riding Hood, the contrast should be stronger in order for it to make sense). Finally, I'm not sure that I understand why the wolf's head is in the floor; it would make sense if Red Riding Hood were holding a sword, but with the gun (even though it's really big), I don't know. Not sure it would be the same without the head, though- it really adds to the funny, quirky, over-the-top dark humor of the picture.

[pap87]

The first thing that struck me as weird in the knight picture was the head of the guy in the foreground. The head cloth and helmet and even his facial hair makes him look arabic but the rest of his armour clearly indicates he is a western knight. And with the guy in the background either he is too big or the horse is too small. Also since there is a lot of foreshortening on his lance maybe try and indicate in his shadow how long it really is. Also darken the shadows a lot more since it's quite sunny there but fade the castle a lot more also.
These are just my opinions so don't feel pressured to go by them.

It looks promising. Keep it up!

[Cris-Palomino]

When you are drawing a subject which may be unfamiliar to you, try to look for reference photos. These days, you can find so much visual reference on the internet if you are unable to find any in a library or bookstore.

This one is of a joust. You can modify things, but notice where the saddle and rider are on the horse. Look at his posture.

http://www.mccullagh.org/image/10d-18/joust-2.html

Find ways to tell your story...the knight in front...steadfast, straight up in his saddle, lance and shield at ready...he looks at the other knight who has breached the top of the hill...some attitude, the horse's leg up...ready to advance, the rider forward a bit in his seat, lance out, a bit threatening....and on a far ridge, the kingdom...laying between them...hanging, perhaps, in the balance.

http://www.elektralusion.com/painter/knighttale_paintover.jpg

By raising the far rider, it also puts his at a level where they both appear to really be able to look at each other. They are taking stock of each other. Who knows what the next move will be.

These are all things you should think out in your mind. The colors you choose, the shapes and how they lead your eye. You are illustrating...you are a storyteller. That's what Pyle and those in his time period were so good at.

(btw, I need to bone up on my own horse reference...find good reference for the things you need. ;))

Hope this is helpful.
Cris

[MasterPete]

Thank you all for the valuable comments! I will definately try to apply them all. Cris, I'll definately look up reference for everything I did from now on. I'll work on both pieces some more and hope to post the second version soon, if anything just so you know that I've really taken on your advices and comments.

Thank you again!

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