Playing with Matches

[Darknessseeker0]

No comments at all? o.O

[kyen]

hey,

i think you captured the energy of the actor well - motion wise and facial expressions are great. it could be humorous if the bear had more of a physical reaction away from the guy? but maybe not the intention here :)

a lot of my attention was drawn to the guys hand holding the match - waiting for the flame - and then the last segment of the animation i noticed his face more

-maybe around 118 it seems like the 'evil look' should come in a few seconds earlier... right when he says "are they" - right now just seems a little bit late.

great work, nice attention to detail :)

[Kimotion]

Hi Jocelyn,

I like your piece and it looks polished.

The main part I feel that don't "click" with me is when he lights the match and the settle. The movement of him lighting th ematch looks way too casual for someone his age ... unless he did this A LOT before and is so used to lightining up that he is so natural at it.

The settle of the screen right arm seems too stiff (frames 033-038). Break up the arm motion from the torso a bit more.

From frames 097 - 105, watch the arc on the screen left arm: it would be nice to see a better "C" shape.

Looking good!

[Darknessseeker0]

Thanks Kayen and Kimotion!

Kayen: Thanks, I haven't seen the movie that the dialogue is from so I don't know how my shot compares to the actor. What kind of reaction do you think the bear should have? I was afraid of making him too floppy since it might take the attention off of Bishop and it would make the bear feel like he didn't have very much stuffing inside of him.

Sorry about the lack of fire on the match. I have no clue how to do fire in Maya and didn't have the time to try to figure it out. I have been whisked right into the next project at AM and haven't had a chance to experiment with stuff like that. I would like to have a flame on there some day but I doubt it'll happen.

Now that you mention it, I guess the evil face could happen sooner. I don't really like that face though, since I don't want him to look evil. I prefer the previous look that's more manic/excited. I felt like Bishop would be like "Oh man, my parents aren't here! I can finally have some fun!" etc. rather than simply being mean. My mentor and classmates like the evil look and persuaded me to keep it at the end. >_<

Kimotion: I thought the dialogue sounded cocky so I figured that Bishop had done this before. Sorry about that. You made a very good point and I should have considered that when I first started. >_<

I agree that the screen right arm needs work there. Thats the last thing I was working on when it was time to turn the assignment in. If I get a chance when my current project is finished, I'll definately go back and continue to tweak that arm. It sticks out like a sore thumb.

Thanks a bunch for pointing out the arc towards the end! I hadn't really noticed it, lol.

[Darknessseeker0]

Hey guys, I revised my shot a bit yesterday. I've cleaned up some of the arcs and incresed the amount of overshoot in a few places. I also worked on the right arm on the part where it was stiff. Hopefully it looks better now.

Revised Shot (http://studentpages.scad.edu/%7Ejcofer20/matchesRevised2.mov)

[Darknessseeker0]

Wow, thanks to whoever gave me three stars! :D

[adib]

very nice animation 5* for the acting!:thumbsup:

[Shreds]

Hey Jocelyn,

First off, great job on this! It looks very nice. I have a few very nitpicky things though.

Check out how much the arms and head moves and how little the torso moves from 77-85. I think there should be some residual movement happening there.

The left wrist, throwing the matchbox, seems to be on a fairly linear path to camera from 87-89.

On those same frames with that same arm, it would be nice to see some drag in the fingers and that box. And at 89 the box is still in the fully extended fingers, then at 90 the box is where it's at on 89, while the fingers overshoot then come back to a settle after that. Just something that I think will make it feel more fluid.

You might be able to strengthen the arc a bit from frames 23-26 on his right hand lighting the match so that whole move blends together a bit more. Also, I'd try to blend the wrist rotation from 32-35 with that whole arm sweep, so it just goes directly into that rotation. Right now it feels like there's sort of a hiccup in that movement.

Watch the arms, torso, and head during the lean back from 35-37, everything is moving at the same time and close to the same amount. My first thought is to delay the arm holding the match a frame or two and then delay the hanging arm a bit longer.

Watch the match from 35-38, starts to move on its own there.

The head is following a nice path of action to the left due to the torso movement from 94-98 but then it at 99 it hits a wall. So if you could continue that movement a bit more and slow out of it I think it would help. Right in that same section at frame 100 the head moves up but you've start moving it down at 99 so you end up with a hitch. Try keeping your high point for the head at 98 and continue with a nice path of action through to 104 and see how that looks.

Check out the spacing on the wrist with the match from 90-97. It might be nice to have that wrist just go through that move without it slowing down in the middle and then continuing. But you'll have to make sure you ease into 97 quite a bit to prepare it for that change in direction.

I'm looking at the match wrist from frames 98-100 and I know that stuff can be hell with the torso moving and fk arms and such. I think what I would try to do is create one single arcing path of action from 97-102. I think what you have from 100-102 works fine together but not as a whole. One possibility one full under arc through that section and then coming up into 102 or 103 rather than an over arc since you've got the torso dropping. You wouldn't have to counteranimate it.

Add a bit of drag just after frame 122 to the forearm with the match, it's hitting a wall at 123.

The mouth shape for the "m" on "mom" at 42 isn't really reading as an "m" for me.

"Always" seems to be 1 frame early, maybe. Just seems to be cutting into "dad"

27-32, eyes are moving but eyelids aren't, might want to track those.
Same at 57-59, 62-66,

Well, that's some of the stuff I'm seeing right now.
Hope it's helpful!!

Again, good job here!

[Darknessseeker0]

double post

[Darknessseeker0]

Thanks adib, I appreciate the extra stars!

Whoa, thanks for the insane in-depth crit Adam! Lol, that seems like more than just a few nitpicky things. :P Thanks a bunch of taking the time to point all of those things out! I'll do my best to revise the shot inbetween my current assignment. There's no way I'm going to let your time be wasted by not fixing all the things you've pointed out. Thanks!

[veljko-lemonade]

a cool piece of animation- a bit short but nevertheless alot of acting action-
cool woork:)

[Darknessseeker0]

Thanks veljko-lemonade! It was just an exercise for class, sorry it wasn't longer. Next term I start planning for my short film so you guys will see some longer pieces from me soon. I'm quite happy that you enjoyed the shot though! :D

[Shreds]

a cool piece of animation- a bit short but nevertheless alot of acting action-
cool woork:)

Shorter, quality animation is always better to watch than a long so-so piece.

[Darknessseeker0]

Lol, excellent point Adam. ^-^

[Alive]

great job... short and sweat! looking foward to seeing your upcoming project

[Darknessseeker0]

Thanks! My new project's coming out of blocking this week. It's not due until week 11 and it's week 6 now. I'll be sure to upload it as soon as it's done though. :bounce:

[merdon]

wow nice shot acting fits it too. im takeing a class in high school for ds max and animation next year i hope i get to learn this stuff.

[Darknessseeker0]

Thanks Merdon! If you want to be ahead of the game, I suggest picking up a copy of the Animator's Survival Kit. You'll learn a ton of stuff and once you apply what you've learned to your animation I can garuntee you'll be ahead of your classmates. :D

If you are really serious about becoming an animator I highly recommend that you attend AnimationMentor. It's a fantastic school, one of the best out there. Plus it's online so you dont have to worry about relocating.

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