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View Full Version : The Doll and the Boy - A very short animation


Smartypants
02-17-2006, 06:30 AM
Hi folks! I recently spent way too much time making this little animation. It doesn't have any audio, and currently, the only version I have is made with Quicktime 7's mpeg 4 compression. If you have other suggestions for compression, please let me know and I'll do my best to get 'em up there.

I made it with Maya 4.5 and just used the renderer that comes with Maya. I would love to hear your comments.

The Doll and the Boy (http://www.cleverevans.com/animations/doll_and_boy.html)

Smartypants
02-17-2006, 08:09 PM
sigh... 102 views, and no comments.

That's pretty depressing.

:(

AlbertArt
02-17-2006, 08:13 PM
The link doesnt seem to load. Maybe thats why.

pepino-oni
02-17-2006, 08:15 PM
Hi, is something wrong with the link....just blank black screen appears to me

supergrover
02-17-2006, 08:30 PM
It shows some potential but to be frank it's pretty poor. Have you considered Animation Mentor?

Smartypants
02-17-2006, 08:42 PM
Thanks to those of you who are telling me there is something wrong with the link... I will fix it as soon as I can.

@Supergrover: could you elaborate on your comment? Some specific, constructive criticism would help. What, specifically, do you find weak, and can you offer suggestions on how to make it better?

Thanks for your comments.

detached
02-17-2006, 09:55 PM
Anyone who leaves a coment like that wont have any valuable info to share anyway.

I thought it was rather good. Anyway, one thing that caught my eye was when the boy goes to jump on the doll. He seems to ease into his jumps a bit too much. Its feels as though just at the moment when he jumps, gravity increases and he looses his momentum. Make the jump a bit higher and snappier by adjusting your curves a smidge.

Heres a rough illustration:http://www.brian-nichols.com/curve.GIF
I'm probly wrong, its a pretty small video.

Good job on this one.

2a03
02-18-2006, 12:09 AM
I thought it was well done... but I was waiting for the doll to do something after the kid stomped it repeatedly... I wanted revenge! Maybe because I relate to dolls better than I do people :) Good work!

Smartypants
02-18-2006, 02:03 AM
Thank you, Detatched and 2a03 for your helpful comments.

PerryE
02-18-2006, 03:12 AM
I thought you did a really Great job with this movie! Very nice movement and timing. I liked the ending... it wasn't what I expected. It might have more impact if the light would flash brighter when it falls... sort of like God was sending him a warning. The main thing that I noticed was the paper-thin wall and door. I'd love to see the boy more developed (details, textures, clothes, etc.) or the room stylized to match the boy's simplified look. I also liked the doll flying throught the door at the beginning, but wish the camera had been closer to the door to see it better.
I could tell you put lots of time in this, but I think it was worth it! :thumbsup:
-Perry

Smartypants
02-20-2006, 03:18 AM
Ok people... at your request, I've re-rendered the animation larger, with a different compression (sorensen 3.)

Unfortunately, bigger pictures mean bigger downloads. This one is 28.7 mb. I'm afraid I'm not super-knowledgeable about compression. If anyone would like to school me with some suggestions, please let me know.

Here is the animation. (http://www.cleverevans.com/animations/doll_and_boy.html)

Bring on the constructive criticism.

detached
02-20-2006, 04:27 AM
the link takes you to c-span.:)

Russta
02-20-2006, 10:45 AM
neither of your links work man, would like to see :curious:

supergrover
02-20-2006, 02:05 PM
OK sorry if my earlier comment was too brief. I just see a number of issues here that will need to be addressed if you are going to improve as an animator. I would like to state upfront that I'm not an authority on this but heres some constructive criticism...

This isn't going to be exhaustive as I don't have a lot of time but here's some points...

The first foot that comes through the door stays stiff and straight as it lands. It should bend at the ball of the foot. I have some sympathy for you here in that you probably rigged the character yourself but this is really important functionality to have in a rig.
It also looks as though the foot may be slightly off the ground plane.

The character is too often off balance. A good example is when he shields his eyes after the lamp breaks. In a pose like this it appears that he should fall backwards.

The timing is erratic in parts. The boy goes from his anticipation to picking up the doll in about 3 frames which looks unnatural.

The hands aren't really animated and you need to pay more attention to overal posing of the arms.

When he walks the shoulders are doing some dramatic rotations but the hips remain stiff. I would tone down those rotations and try to get the hips looking right first.

The weight shifts aren't working properly. There doesn't seem to be any left and right sway as he walks.

When he kicks the doll the doll slows out of it's position when it should fast out and it fails to follow the arc described by the foot.

The anticipation before he stomps on the doll is too slow and a bit off balance.

I don't want to go on but there are major problems with this scene from an animation perspective. I don't want to be discouraging but this isn't of the highest standard and I would highly recommend AM.

SG

Paul B
02-20-2006, 05:48 PM
I think the camera shakes are starting before his foot actually hits the ground, maybe you should shift them back a frame. Then you could probably shorten them a bit and delay the lamp jiggle so that it continues even after the camera shake has ended -overlapping the "shake" action might make the the lamp look a bit more natural and noticable.

Smartypants
02-20-2006, 10:27 PM
Ok the link works now, sorry about the weirdness.

LINK (http://www.cleverevans.com/animations/doll_and_boy.html)

@supergrover: That's more like it! There are some good suggestions here. Thanks for the thorough and honest critique.

Animonster
02-21-2006, 10:58 PM
There have been quite a few good comments made...many of which I noticed, so I'll try to not be too redundant.

1)The lamp falls way too fast. I know you are trying to make an impact, but it doesn't have time to speed up into its fall...it just falls at an amazingly fast rate.

2)The boy's hand seems to be moving in too generic of a motion when he is stroking the dolly. I'd try to make it curl around the curvature of the dolly head a bit more and animate the fingers accordingly - it will give it a more realistic feel.

These are some small things, but I hope they help

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