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hopper2k
05-11-2005, 09:15 PM
http://www.shatteredmotion.com/hopper_taxes1.mov - right click, save target as - 900 kb

Hola. Here is my animation for this month's 10 sec club. I'm kinda stuck as to where I can push it further. I kinda wanna say I'm done, but I kinda DON'T want to say that either. Any suggestions? I usually post my animations from start to finish, but for this one, I kinda tested myself to see if I can be trusted by my own judgements. Eh, who knows. Thoughts? Thanks in advance.

Tom W.
05-12-2005, 01:01 AM
Hey, there hopper, been following you're work and I'm seeing a lot of improvement, I think the shake at the end doesn't fit the piece; moreover, it's also cliché IMO. I'll edit this post later with a better critique...

ivanisavich
05-12-2005, 05:18 AM
Hey there ho there,

A good start on your anim. It's nice to see another entry posted here at cgtalk, still early into the competition ;)

Good things:

-The body movements at the beginning and middle of the animation are well done.
-The eyes and eyebrow movements are also fine.

Not-so-good-and-need-to-be-fixed things:

-You pretty much didn't get a single word of the lip sync. Your character doesn't pronounce any of the words properly, and watching his mouth accompanied by that sound file is like watching a poorly dubbed Japanese movie :P
-The timing needs to be tightened up on some of the motions. There are times when the snappiness of some of the hand movements (like when he's listing the 3 things) don't sync up with the peak pronounciations of the words that are being said....and therefore some of his movements seem to "lag" behind some of the words.
-I agree with Tom W. that the shaking at the end seems a bit forced. Maybe have him clenching his fists or something in anger, rather than beating up on his friend ;)

Luckily, you've got lots of time to work on this still....so we expect your next update to be awesome! ;) ;)

hopper2k
05-12-2005, 06:46 PM
**update**

http://www.shatteredmotion.com/hopper_taxes2.mov - update #2 - 900 kb

Thanks. I've gotten rid of the shake and fixed up the lip sync a bit and tightened up some of the motions. Any better? It may be a bit over-acted as well, and the new adding adds to it I think. I'm not sure about the new ending though. At the end of the clip, I read it as if he was angry and making sure he was getting his point across to this guy. Let me know what you think, thanks.

ReBootedOne
05-13-2005, 12:28 AM
This is lookin' nice, especially the stuff in the beginning...
One suggestion I have is I would reallllly reconsider the pose you have here for "...from people every day..."
It just kinda breaks up the flow, and it is a totally 180 from your previous actions...

Other than that, I'd say this is lookin' really nice.

-eric

hopper2k
05-13-2005, 12:16 PM
http://www.shatteredmotion.com/hopper_taxes3.mov - update #3 - 800 kb

call me crazy, but now i have 3 versions, or 3 different endings i should say (the ones i don't use will be the "extras" on the DVD, hehe). I feel this new ending is more natural I suppose, and the "from people everyday" pose is better than the original one. I made very slight changes to the beginning motions, but nothing major. When he listed the 3 things, I kept him going the same way (i experimented with other things, didn't look right) but this feels right for me.

Perhaps I am going in circles with this, but I have lots to learn though, and have learned plenty with this one animation.

To everyone who has posted tips, thanks so much.

Feel free to butcher this one also!

Wilson-3d
05-13-2005, 02:49 PM
Nice job. Getting down to the nitty-gritty now. When he turns saying everybody. It looks to me like on the first turn the wrist jumps a little or seems off the arc to me. Frame 16 - 23 go across in a line. You could put in another key there to define a better arc. Also on the step to turn around I think the elbow hangs up in the air for too long-right after frame 75. Nice follow through but I would not have it hang there for so many frames. I think it looks like a pop that is distracting. Good work.

freakmoomin
05-14-2005, 01:50 AM
hey

i actually liked the first two better, i know they may be a little over the top, and the shake may be "cliché" but i kinda liked that about it.

It really depends on what you are going for? realism or cartoonism? if you want realism then go for something along the lines of the 3rd one but for good over the top cartoony exagerated animation go for 1 or 2. all 3 seem pretty good, just tweaking here and there and work a little more on the facial and they are good to go.

nice work

kev

hopper2k
05-14-2005, 09:55 AM
Thanks for the suggestions. I'll probably post one more update later on but that will be it, time to move on. As for being cartoony or realistic, I really didn't have anything in mind, just going for what I felt was right. However, I kept changing it based on people's suggestions, and working with the 3rd ending, I had not really done acting that was as subtle as that (even though it's not that subtle, but less over the top than before). Mostly all of my previous acting animations have pretty much been over the top and overly exagerrated, and this was a change, even though I had no intentions on making it this way (and it was tough!). My initial reaction to the clip was a pretty much like my original version, with not even thinking how it would work with some subtle motions. I know some people who prefer the original version too, and think my latest one is boring.

I guess I also tend to think that subtle animations are boring, but you rarely see those, yet ALOT are real effective. So for maybe next time, I'll have that in mind and really feel and analyze the clip from all different directions, instead of thinking "ok, i can have him move alot up and down here, have his arm swing like crazy here, and BOOM, it's done!" Ok, NO, I never thought that way, but from alot of, well, I guess "student" animations (especially from this clip) the thinking in mind seems to be that way, no offense to anyone. I finished school not too long ago, but still have much (words can't describe how much) learning regarding character animation.

hopper2k
05-17-2005, 07:01 AM
here's the final version you can view on my site: http://www.shatteredmotion.com/hopper_portfoliosite/10sec_may05.htm


thanks for all the suggestions!

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