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Iotrez
04-11-2005, 08:43 PM
Hi, here is an animation project I've been working on.


Any comments/critique appreciated.


Thanks.

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/simon.davies/Untitled.avi http://homepage.ntlworld.com/simon.davies/Untitled.avi


9.9 megs (avi)

Sorry, I had to make the resolution quite low to get the file size down.

Mikademius
04-13-2005, 01:13 PM
I like it. At first I thought "with a filename like that, it can't be good" :)
But it actually was. Why don't you tell us more about the project, maybe include some shots of the rig etc. I'd like to know more about this....

nuclearbum
04-13-2005, 07:06 PM
that's pretty nice! yeah, i think you should post some more about th project, and yes the file name is misleading, haha. all i would say is your lighting right now looks a little washed out or something.

just looking at it i'd probably add a little more to when the frog points at the little bird that fell on the ground. something is missing or things move a little fast. i'd just extend it a little longer, a second or two. or maybe i'm just seeing things again ;)

keep it up and post some more stuff about this project!

Geddart
04-13-2005, 10:24 PM
Wow, nice work!
I like your Character Design. She looks really ugly and the bird really poor. :)
Also the Animation is very nice. Very long already! How long did you work on that?
I don't have much time cause i have to work on my own shortfilm right now but i'll give you some more comments when i'm done.

Keep it UP! :thumbsup:

StuartVarrall
04-14-2005, 01:56 AM
Hey that's looking really nice, you've obviously been busy on that! It looks a lot like an in game cutscene because of the to the style.

The character design is great, and she's moving really well.

There were a few things I noticed, so here goes;

- the pause between the door opening and the action kicking off is too long. As soon as the door opens she should be waving her arms around with birds flocking everywhere...

- it's great that there's some time where she's thinking about what to do with the birds, but it doesn't quite work yet. The time it takes for her to make the decision is too long... it's too obvious what is going to happen after she looks at the cauldron [~41 seconds] Maybe frame the shot better to show the alternative [throw them outside?] or not have the cauldron in view the whole time? or just speed up the whole shot. [have her look at the birds, whilst licking her lips, whilst moving towards the cauldron, maybe from a shot behind the cauldron]

-be careful deforming the eyeball. It's altering the shape of the iris which is really distracting and looks really wrong :hmm:

-check the timing of the bird bouncing, it doesn't look right.

-watch the lighting on the bird when she picks it up. He gets lost in the shadows making it hard to tell what's happening.

The camera shots are well constructed to get the audience to relate to the bird and I think the emotion generally comes out well.
The snow looks great, and so does the secondary animation on the cloth.

What are your plans for the audio, i think that'll improve things a lot...

good luck,
stu

Iotrez
04-15-2005, 01:50 PM
Thanks alot for the replies. Lots of good suggestions there.:thumbsup:

This is for my MA animation project. I might have to finish it after I've finished the course though cos I'm running out of time.

What are your plans for the audio, i think that'll improve things a lot...

Yeah I'd like to add sounds like footsteps etc to it. But I'm kind of thinking I should just focus on the visuals and animation because thats what I want to improve at.

mimo8
04-15-2005, 06:48 PM
wow, thatīs a nice piece of animation.
like it a lot. funny special characters and good moves.
will give it a closer look later.

also i would love to see some more documentation on this project, dont you want to show us some concept drawing etc. tell us abit bout the story and if you do it alone or in team

http://www.brain-one.at/mmm/bunny.gif

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