Raihorn Archers

[rebuilder]

What are they doing exactly? They're looking at the viewer, but is the viewer a threat to them? Who's the one in front aiming the bow at, what is the one in the back doing? Saying "hi"?

If your intention is for them to be threatening, it might be a good idea to have them aiming at the viewer.

[Rakulei]

Ah, I forgot to add it in because i turned off my lineart layer; but the one at the back is actually holding an arrow. My aim is not for them to be threatening, more like in a neutral stance.

[Maginnis]

I think the fabric on the long coat on the character on the left could use another pass as far as wrinkles and "flow" goes. Since the arm is raised so straight up it'd help sell the action of the picture to have the sleeve falling a bit down the arm, that way the collection of fabric down towards the upper arm would help add a lot of good wrinkles there. Also think about having the flap of the coat kind of "whipped" around the leg more, not so much laying on the leg buy more hovering over it and curving around it. I think the cool thing about long coats is that they become their own characters and don't need to follow the body of the wearer so much as add to the movement in the image. Keep this one up, I enjoy the layout of it especially!

[AIPh Pretzel]

I can't tell what is going on in this piece. I've turned the brightness up on my monitor and I still have no idea what these two people are doing.

[BMunchausen]

Hey there, Rakulei!

Nice start on this. I agree with Maginnis about the coat on the left especially. The folds are a bit too regular to be believable. Do you have something you could maybe use as a photo reference for this? Like a bathrobe or trenchcoat you could take a picture of someone wearing while in this pose? That would help a lot.

The pose of the figure on the left is somewhat ambiguous - It's almost like we're seeing him (?) from the front, when the figure on the right tells us we're looking at them from above. The left hand of the right hand figure is causing a "tangent" with the left leg of the lefthand figure - notice how they're meeting up on a horizontal, that is not making the overlap of those figures work very well. I'd shift one of them a bit, so they don't line up so evenly.

The pose of the right hand figure too, is ambiguous because there's not much information given yet in the coat. It just makes him (her?) look really short. :)

Hrm...to push the spatial relationships more, you could make the figure in front a bit bigger - that would give you more interesting variation in scale and would push the back figure back even more. You could also make the light stronger on the foreground figure and fade it back some, to the background figure to add drama.

I can see this is in its early stages but you have a good start here.

[Rakulei]

Hello there, BMunchausen! Thank you so much for your helpful suggestions; i took your advice and changed the layout quite abit; also refined the faces a teeny bit more, although the one on the left looks like an idiot unfinished, lol.

Maginnis, i agree with your opinion totally, and also made changes according to what you suggested, but i have not refined the folds yet :( Thanks so much!

Sorry for wasting your time AIPh Pretzel, i know my work is horrible but i'm trying hard to improve :)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/MercurialXen/newretard6.jpg

Once again thank you guys so much for the critiques!

[Maginnis]

niceness:) it's coming along now for sure glad I could offer some useful critiques. once I get all approved as a new member feel free to crit my stuff too! the addition of more flow to the coat really kicked up the action a bit.

[fproto]

Hey man. That's some nice stuff.
Love the detail on the faces. Now if only the rest will have the same level of detail.
The arm on the front guy is a bit stubby, I think.
And his bow doesn't have a string. :D
The archer at the back has a bow that's really small, while the one in the front
has a gigantic bow. I don't know if this was intentional.
I know there's baggy pants and all, but the ones in your pic
don't look like the archer can move around in them at all.
It looks as if it's folded to half its length. If a ninja comes after him, he'd be toast. :D
Last thing... The ponytail shouldn't be cut off evenly at the end like that.
Unless that was intentional.
Other than that, it's really neat lookin.
I love the dark mood.
This is coming along great. Keep up the good work.
Cheers.

[AIPh Pretzel]

Sorry for wasting your time AIPh Pretzel, i know my work is horrible but i'm trying hard to improve :)

The piece is simply too dark for my monitor, it's not a case of wasting anyone's time.

[Rakulei]

Hello guys, thank you for the advice and critiques :) I changed some stuff according to the pointers given, still some work to do on the folds and some other areas. Let me know what you think, and if there are any serious mistakes so far!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/MercurialXen/newretard10.jpg

Sure Mag! Will look out for your work too :) Thanks again for the advice!

Hi fproto! Thanks for pointing out the mistakes! I updated it a little, hehe.

AIPh Pretzel, it might look a little retarded but i uploaded a brighter version. Its just adjusting of brightness/contrast in PS, hope its a little better :)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/MercurialXen/newretard11_pretzel.jpg

[yAdam]

Hey man, really like how this has developed, but the arm of the character on the right hand side still looks a bit odd. i think it would benefit from some foreshortening.

[Rakulei]

Hey man, really like how this has developed, but the arm of the character on the right hand side still looks a bit odd. i think it would benefit from some foreshortening.

Hey yAdam, i'm aware of the problem but i cant seem to get the right lighting on his arm because of the robe; i've drawn anatomy below it and it looks fine but when the robe goes on everything seems to go haywire :( Not sure how to fix it, sigh.

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