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View Full Version : Script musicvideo Torched! feedback please


ManAndDog
03-16-2005, 12:05 PM
Hello guys,

We are two Dutch students who are in our senior year working on a project that will conclude our education. This project consists of making a videoclip in 3D for a local upcoming band. For the people who want to hear some of the song it can be found on www.flonline.nl (http://www.flonline.nl/) in the downloadsection, it is called Torched.

We have have been writing on the concept and script for about 3 days check the zip or follow this link: http://members.home.nl/twalter/script_torched_v1.0.doc (http://members.home.nl/twalter/script_torched_v1.0.doc)to see what we have come up with so far.

In the coming months were going to post the developments and progress of this project in the different categories on CGTalk. We hope to get a lot of feedback and critisisms. We are going to use this forum as a way to show our teachers the pogress and professionality of the project.

If you think there should be major changes in the script, please don't hesitate to make a comment. Our motivation is to make a better product.

In short the script is about:
Cardboard puppets that come to life in a children’s playroom and start playing music. More and more cardboard people come out of the cardboard and form a large crowd in front off the dollhouse. Here the band is playing and dancing. Meanwhile some different events take place (read about them in the script). In the end some of the puppets start smoking at their joints because of the intense dancing on the music and eventually catch fire.

dobermunk
03-17-2005, 08:40 AM
Not really a crit (time is sparse right now) but I think you may get more response with a bit of text transcription. i.e. what is the text or tone of the music durting certain segments.

It's difficult to give decent feedback at the moment. My impression is that you have a decent scenario - but I can't assess it as I don't see the connection to the song content.
Other than that, it seems somewhat stereotypical: drawings coming to life, puppets coming to life - but this might work, depending on designs and song elements....

Sorry I can't dig deeper right now.

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03-17-2005, 08:40 AM
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