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View Full Version : Female Character for Game Project WIP.. Critiques needed!


Rakulei
01-24-2005, 02:48 PM
Hello everyone, this is a painting i've been working on for the past few days. I would be deeply appreciative if anyone could point out any major mistakes in the composition/anatomy before i move on to detailing. And i was wondering how i could make the lighting more attention-grabbing. Here she is:


Initial Sketch


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/MercurialXen/devlyna_leira_flip.jpg

Any form of critiques and tips are really, really appreciated! Thanks a ton!

Rudeone
01-24-2005, 03:17 PM
Most attention should go to the hand, the fingersegments that are attached to the palm are slightly to large (especially the pinky), thumb is to large also and looks kinda ahkward, maybe you should paint it like she's holding the blade with her thumb.
Her earlobe looks attached to her lower jaw, her ear needs to be smaller, you should make the earlobe at the hight of the nostril.

That's all I can find, other than that it looks good, very nice painting

Matt_Forcum
01-24-2005, 03:20 PM
I can help with the lighting. If you would like to add some drama. Consider a nice 3 point lighting setup. (Google it if you don't know exactlly what that is.)

A strong warm main light with a soft blueish fill always looks very dramatic. (although I prefer not to use such extreme colors when I paint.) and then use a slight rim light to help seperate the figure from the background.

its a bit hard to explaine, but there are many good articles on its use out there.

-Matt

shyamshriram
01-24-2005, 03:22 PM
Watch out her center line and the hands upper part, i mean her biceps are looking bit long and u have to take care of her jaw line, her chin is looking too pointed. waiting for more updates :)

Rakulei
01-24-2005, 03:47 PM
Rudeone: Ah thanks, i was really wondering what was wrong with her face. Didnt' really take note of her ear cause of the sideburn. Yes i think her holding the sword would be a better viable pose, i'll try it out! Thanks once again!

Ephesus: Thank you, i'll definitely try it out when i modify the currently bland lighting =\

shyamshriram: Ah yes, i'll have to correct that! =) Thanks for the pointers. Will post some updates soon!

Thanks for all the comments guys, will work hard on this one!

jessart
01-24-2005, 11:05 PM
The main thing that bugs me is the placement of her belly button, its a bit too high, its a good start, id like to see where youre going with the shading.

Rakulei
01-25-2005, 10:00 AM
jessart: Thanks for pointing that out, i fixed it =)

Update 25/1/2005

Detailed in her hair and some other little stuff. Changed various anatomy flaws as suggested by the kind people above this post =)

I tried out the 3point lighting setup on her face and her hair, but i'm not sure if i rendered it correctly. I have a feeling that her face is still too bright.. I tried to darken it a little but just couldn't get the right feeling, would appreciate it if anyone could point me in the right direction!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/MercurialXen/devlyna_leira_lightinghair.jpg

Rakulei
01-26-2005, 05:50 PM
Tried adding in heavier shadows as i felt the lighting wasnt dramatic enough. My last appeal for help didn't really receive any response, so i tried messing around with lightings and highlights albeit in a confused manner. I felt that her eyes werent expressive enough, so i made them a tad hazier.

Would be grateful to anyone who would take a look and critique on my progress so far; am i totally off-course? As for the BG, i want to establish a nice warm light on the right side of the painting, but how should it affect my character? I tried a few hues (yellow, orange etc) but they just made her look like some scary monster :(

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/MercurialXen/devlyna_leiralighting_26thJan2005.jpg

Rakulei
02-12-2005, 08:18 PM
I've run into some hard obstacles again, so i decided to try and see if anyone could help me out. I was wondering if the colour of the BG should be altered. I find this piece overall very dull and not striking. If so, what colour would be a good choice? I added another character into the composition as i thought the old one was kinda boring, how is it looking so far? Any comments would be deeply appreciated.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/MercurialXen/devlyna_leira_withguy.jpg

ameermagdy
02-12-2005, 08:41 PM
this is becoming great, I can see the progress, I think adiing some other marks like this on her upper dress, like ending them with a dragon or something with the same palette you have would be great, :) keep it up

alastairwinter
02-13-2005, 03:26 AM
Hey Rakulei,

Just a quick post, but since you wanted critique on the anatomy, at first glance I can tell there are some things off. :) For the female (the only one I can give some quick points on), her neck is too long, shorten it down roughly so that there is about the distance from the chin to her nose making the neck to the shoulders (I know there is a REAL proportion out there but I can't think of it offhand). If you correct the neck, it should make the breasts seem as though they aren't so far away, but after that the belly/ribs/abdomenal area needs to be turned to the right a bit. With her pose, her belly button shouldn't be so far off--take a look at her shoulders. It's very hard to contort while keeping them straight (as in the twist at the waist). Hope that helps, and it's looking interesting!

:thumbsup:

(wow, in hindsight it seems like I'm saying all this in one breath...which I guess is all I have at the moment! Good luck!)

ajay1589
02-13-2005, 04:45 AM
much much better, but u still need to work on those fingers(take a quick glance at your own, are they really that skinny and seperated?) The jaw line is looking much better too, blend the arms a little more and add some shine

Rakulei
02-18-2005, 05:44 AM
Thank you all for your kind comments! =) I decided to add a little bit more on the lighting before i started to change the anatomy, i would really appreciate it if someone experienced with lighting could give me a few tips. Thanks a ton!


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/MercurialXen/devlyna_leiraactprolighting.jpg

hpslashluvr
02-18-2005, 11:14 PM
it took me a while to understand how the arm worked behind the girl on the left side...i would take it out if it isn't too late, with the purple light it looks like a hand is coming out and grabbing her sword

Rakulei
02-19-2005, 03:31 AM
it took me a while to understand how the arm worked behind the girl on the left side...i would take it out if it isn't too late, with the purple light it looks like a hand is coming out and grabbing her sword

Hmm thank you, i actually tried to define the hand a little bit more, is this working better?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/MercurialXen/devlyna_leira_almost_complete.jpg

hpslashluvr
02-19-2005, 05:23 AM
i would either bring the light up a little (the guy's light) or dim it b/c the first thing my eye goes to is his light

what i meant about the arm was the grip of the sword, it looks like a hand a bit under the glow, and the guy's arm, just brings your eye off the page...i would just get rid of it IMO but gah you worked on it! haha damn it

also that glove and the glove on his other arm do not quite match in style or quality...the one on the left is much better

the guy's face is so much more stylized than the girl's face, make sure to match their craftsmanship to each other

work on her right thigh/leg some, i think the thigh should come down just a little more (the part near her crotch)

Rakulei
02-19-2005, 06:32 AM
Thank you for that invaluable piece of feedback and the nice little image adjustment! I'll work on it a little more and post back in awhile! :)

Swoop
02-19-2005, 04:09 PM
Has a real dvd cover feeling too it.. got the impression that this would be the cover for some cool movie somehow :D
Anyways need to be detailed out a bit more.. the hand especially, but really comming along extremly nicely :D Looking forward to the finished awsome result :D

Rakulei
03-22-2005, 01:03 PM
Hello guys; I know its been a long long while since i last updated; i finished this piece some time back (sorta) and had to move on to other works because of a pressing schedule. Here's the complete piece.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v253/MercurialXen/devlyna_leira_complete.jpg

I know it still has plenty of flaws, but i learnt alot from it and hope my future works will turn out better :) Thank you all that have contributed and replied with gracious and invaluable criticisms, i really, really appreciate all of it.

BMunchausen
03-22-2005, 10:30 PM
First the good:

I'm impressed by the way you've taken suggestions and critiques and have used them to improve the piece a lot. I like how defined she's gotten and how much softer and more finished. Nice rendering job; colors are harmonious and I like her face.

Now the stuff that needs work:

Well this won't be very helpful for this piece, but maybe for future ones - this pose is inherently awkward. Game characters need to have strong, easily identifiable silhouettes, sort of like comic book characters and she doens't have much of one because of this "closed in" pose.

The pose is strange with her right arm so contorted in front of her - this doesn't allow you to delineate the beauty of her arm since it's all bunched up in front of her. It also makes her look weak, since she's not brandishing the sword or even holding it firmly. (I'm not sure what's really going on there with the sword with that odd glow on it.) The left arm's in a strangely protective gesture and I'm not sure what I should take that to mean - it doesn't give her a clearly definitive character. Is she fearless? Timid? Coy? It's hard to tell by her expression and body language.


Her neck looks flat because of the way you've drawn the cords going around it. Draw them as if they're going around a cylinder because that's what the neck is, after all.
I think too, that her jaw's gotten better but still looks too sharp and too much like a hard, constant line from her ear to her chin. The face has different planes and her face lacks a definite side plane at the jawline. The line around her left breast, carving into her arm is probably too thick and dark. To create better overlap, I'd soften that.

Compositionally, I dont' think the guy behind her is helping her at all and is diffusing the whole focus of the piece. The ties on his headband look weird the way they go behind her; they look like something sticking through her skull. He feels disproportionate - since he's further back in space, he should be smaller even if he's physically larger - but he's shown as larger than she is which makes the space confusing. There also doesn't seem to be a credible amount of space between her and him for his elbow to fit.

What the piece right now is needing most is focus. Those two glaring lights are confusing the focus - she should be the focus, and within that, probably her face - but my eyes keep darting back and forth between the two glowing lights.

Rakulei
03-23-2005, 07:15 AM
First the good:

I'm impressed by the way you've taken suggestions and critiques and have used them to improve the piece a lot. I like how defined she's gotten and how much softer and more finished. Nice rendering job; colors are harmonious and I like her face.

Now the stuff that needs work:

Well this won't be very helpful for this piece, but maybe for future ones - this pose is inherently awkward. Game characters need to have strong, easily identifiable silhouettes, sort of like comic book characters and she doens't have much of one because of this "closed in" pose.


Thank you for your immensely helpful critique; i never really thought about her being too "closed in", i guess that's why i didn't really like this one and did not relish the thought touching it up. I made many, many mistakes in this one. They range all the way from composition, lighting, lack of planning, badly imagined poses etc. I feel that i've learned alot just by going through your post and getting reminded of all the things i should not have done but just did it anyway, like adding the guy in and a second light source.

I will definitely take all these in mind when rendering future pieces; thank you once again for pointing them all out! :)

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