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supremo
01-07-2005, 06:43 PM
Here's the most up to date version of page 1 of a comic I was working on a couple years ago. I never got around to coloring it and felt inspired to do it recently. So here's where I'm at.

http://www.wayimages.com/data/1294/1105126686comic1.jpg

Of course, I'm looking for comments on style, technique, or whatever. Let me know how you feel about it! It was drawn and inked in real life, then scanned and colored in Photoshop, with my mighty purple Creation Station! :shrug:

supremo
01-07-2005, 06:43 PM
I'll use this post for the 1st image in the WIP as I update...

Eva 001
01-07-2005, 07:44 PM
Nice I like the colors alot! Will the whole comic have the same style?

Ilikesoup
01-07-2005, 07:45 PM
The drawings look good, but the first three panels are very dark, making it hard to see what's going on. In the fourth panel, I think the exploding comet needs touching up -- there's no separation between the top edge of the explosion and the comet's tail, and you might try mixing in some rounded "cloud" shapes in the center to break up the very angular lines. The color blending that you used looks out of place since everything else is solid color. Lastly, every color used in that panel appears to have a yellow tone -- you might want to introduce some other colors.

I don't mean that to sound harsh. Those are just what came to mind.

BTW, is there a reason that the background is more detailed than the foreground characters? Usually it's the other way around. Is the kid in bed dreaming about the comet and the foreground people are observing him as he sleeps?

supremo
01-08-2005, 04:57 PM
Have you ever noticed how dreams often seem more real than reality? I mean, your emotions seem more pure, everything seems more clear...

But you read it exactly right, Ilikesoup. The people there at the bottom are looking at my little subject in the bed there while he dreams comet-filled dreams. And don't worry about being harsh, I like to hear what people think.

The tone you see is actually a green 40% overlay. I may tone it down a little but I used it to unify the page a little better. I might separate the forground characters from it yet. And I see what you're saying about the explosion being a little out of place. I wanted it to appear violent so I used the different style. I'm planning to put more detail in the characters yet, hopefully that will look a little more consistent compared to the bkgd.

More crit! Please!

kraal
01-09-2005, 01:58 AM
just a story telling sublety that i want to mention.... the comet is traviling to the left in the first panels.... but on impact it looks as if it should of been coming from the right....

hope that makes since....

Ognus
01-09-2005, 02:27 AM
why does he dream of comets?

Espen
01-13-2005, 09:20 PM
Hi Supremo,

I like the comic... reminds me a bit of the way I was drawing some time ago... what brings be to some topic that is maybe not very helpfull, but eventually interesting for you to think about. If you say that you made this comic some years ago - why do you want to colorize it now?

By the way... thanks for your critique to my Thread: Mr. Fat Cat... it's a bit like the same with this drawing. It's an old drawing that I used to practice some aspects of digital painting (I was simply to lazy to come up with a new character design an picked an old one.) Maybe I should have drawn it completely new... or in your case: maybe you should considder to draw the page again? I mean: it IS very good, but maybe you could do much better now... ?

The sharp outlines and the smooth coloring do not go together for me - even if it's just a dream that should be more vivid than the frame story. Maybe a more reduced way of using colors would do. Like using black and white only for the main story with just one additional color and a very limitted palette for the dreams... (hard to explain in English... but maybe you know what I mean?)

I hope this does not sound negative. I really do like your style! Keep on going. If the project has to be finished it has to be finished...

Greetings
Espen

Ognus
01-14-2005, 02:39 AM
Yeah,
But why does he dream of comets?

supremo
01-14-2005, 05:11 AM
:D I guess you'd have to read the comic to find out, eh Ognus? Though to be perfectly honest with you it's not a comet at all!

Espen - thanks for the thoughtful and honest commentary! I see what you mean and it's kinda funny because you can see my rendering ability improve throughout the comic. 24 pages of drawing the same things have that effect, I guess.

I've been meaning to color it the whole time I was doing it and since then but never had the inspiration. Then I re-read it the other day and actually really liked it and thought what the hell. Thus, it certainly doesn't have to be finished, but I'm worried that someday I'll look back and say, "Man, why did I never finish that?" I guess I could just color the pages at the end that I like the best...

In any case, I'd like to ask is it the explosion itself that doesn't work with the colors? Or is it the whole background scene that doesn't look right to you? I actually feel pretty good about it but I'm curious to know exactly what bugs you guys about it.

Lovliebutterfly
01-14-2005, 10:39 PM
On the whole it is a very stylised comic style. I think there are a bit too mcuh dark lines in the drawing. Maybe you could reduce the line art a bit and add color instead. The tone is also the same all over, making it hard to know that the boy is actually dreaming. I would suggest you either alter the color or painting style to differentiate between reality and his dreams. I also think that the smoke effect needs more work. I've just got the impression that the boy seems to be falling off the bed a bit. Overall, I like your drawing style though!

Eva 001
01-20-2005, 12:32 AM
Will you be posting another sketch from this same comic soon? I'd like to see more...

supremo
01-26-2005, 01:50 AM
Will you be posting another sketch from this same comic soon? I'd like to see more...

:)

I'd love to, but have been soo busy lately! I'd like to finish the jersey girl first, I think.

Ognus
02-20-2005, 01:13 AM
I have a character who dreams of comets too. Well sort of.
Got any newer drawings? You say this was old. I would love to see some new stuff.

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