Character Animation Monologue

[paul k.]

No one has anything to say......must not be too good???

[st45]

It is looking very good.

Most critiques on this sort of thing are quite subjective but here's the only feedback I have so far. Take with a grain of salt.

During the words "of his glorry" I thought the hand gestures were unnatural. I can't see a him holding this gesture so long.

During the words "thirty two years of torture! Thirty two years!" perhaps he should be more passionate, perhaps pounding his chest a bit, instead of holding in that position. Perhaps more tightly clenched fists.

The facial animation needs to be more extreme. He's delivering this anguished speech, yet only his lips seem to be moving. Were I delivering the same speech, my eyes would sometimes squint, my teeth would clench, and perhaps the cords on my neck would stand out a bit.

Having said all this, I've got to say, you've done far better than any animated piece I've done to date, so keep it up. It is very likely that other more experienced animators would dissagree with me.

Mark

[dobermunk]

I like what you've got going here, the model looks interesting and has personality. The animation suffers under what I'd call "literal translation" - like you're trying to illustrate the voice with poses, instead of building moments and actions that compliment the voice and build character.
I don' t feel qualified to crit your piece technically - you might want to check out http://www.10secondclub.net/ for that, or http://cgchar.toonstruck.com/forum/index.php

D.

edit: ah! see you're already there. Good on ya!

[jutland]

The characters voice doesn't seem to match his body language. Especially when he's talking about the torture he's endured. Try giving the same speech in front of a mirror and watch your body language as you speak the lines.

Other then that it is a good animation. Just needs a few tweaks.

[HowardM]

Looks cool!
The lipsync needs some work.
:p

[paul k.]

Thanks for the comments..... I have gotten other feedback in some of the other forums and the two things that seem to be coming up is that it looks too pose to pose...and that the lipsync is good but needs a little tweeking. I'll work on it today and post it later. Thanks.

[webfox]

I haven't seen the movie, but I am wondering if you are doing your own version of the scene or following how the actor portrayed the piece.

I like how the hands go back and create a nice silhouette at "He killed Mozart," but that gesture seems way off for what he's saying. Also, he points to God way too far late into the scene. He refers to God a number of times and I'd think he'd point an accusing finger heavenward at the "He killed Mozart" line, rather than emphasizing the word "torture" with the redirection.

Interesting lines to work from. Have you considered building a crude set for him to act in rather than just do a soliloquy?

Just some thoughts. Keep at it. I'm looking forward to seeing your changes. :thumbsup:

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