View Full Version : Need crit for Demo Reel
Magidion 03-01-2004, 03:33 AM Hi Guys/Gals
I am putting a demo reel together and I have just created this piece and I'd love feedback on it.
Here's the link (http://www.rit.edu/~abb0701/BoXFall_01.mov)
I'm looking forwards to your crits
thanks
Magi
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pantheransl
03-01-2004, 03:47 AM
i think he flips over too quickly, like when he gets closer to standing up right he should slow down some then speed back up as he falls. also his elbows go below the ground level (the grid). nice job tho.
Lekku
03-01-2004, 09:56 AM
His feet seem WAY too heavy at the beginning, and I don't think he holds the box long enough. Maybe he should hold it a bit, let it slip, then lose balance?
neonoodle
03-04-2004, 08:57 AM
He has too much motion in the beginning. Aside from his feet seeming "too heavy" as Lekku said, his shoulders move too much and the movement is a bit jerky. On the anticipation, I think his arms go up too high. When he's doing the antipation pose, he also takes a step and seems like he's about to fall over. Why is he so uncoordinated? On the lift, the first two attempts look too similar. Maybe play around with the timing on them so the first one he tries to lift it and is surprised at how heavy it is so he goes and attempts to get more momentum on the second lift and tries harder that time... Then he really pushes down and lifts it.
When he finally gets the box off the ground, it loses weight pretty much instantaneously. It's heavy for a few frames and then it seems like something holding the box "lets go" and he falls over. I don't know if that's what you had planned but it seemed strange to me. maybe smooth out the ease out on the box when he finally lifts it off the ground. Not too much since that whole motion is looking pretty good right now but just a little I think would add more weight to the box.
Another thing that bothered me was that on the third try the box seemed to be lighter because he doesn't look like he's trying any harder to lift it and it moves pretty easily. I would have liked to see some more motion on the box on the second lift attempt.
Hope that helps.
Magidion
03-04-2004, 01:00 PM
thanks guys,
I've taken a look at your feedback and I'm adjusting the movement and hopefully the result. I'll post it later today
thanks for your thoughts
Magi
Magidion
03-04-2004, 04:29 PM
Here is the latest version. I tried to tone down the movement in the beginning and I changed the out come of the piece.
I'd love to hear more
Here's the new link (http://www.rit.edu/~abb0701/BoxLift_03.mov)
thanks
Magi
neonoodle
03-04-2004, 11:33 PM
Its looking better, but I think there's still a few issues with it. One the 2 steps in the beginning, there's some popping going on with the knees. Watch your arcs there and smooth out some of the movement. One the first step, his arms are a little stiff. I think he gets up from the recoil pose a little too quickly on the second step. On the antipation pose, he's looking like he's too uptight. I think it's because the elbows are pointing inward toward his body instead of outward, and it's giving him a really uneasy pose. Also, there's some twinning going on there. Try having different parts of the body hitting their extremes at different times. For example, try making the characters arms lead into the anticipation pose and then have the body lead into him reaching for the object, with the arms slightly dragging behind, but you can change that around to have whatever you want leading. Having everything hit at the same time makes the animation seem very stiff to me. When he's reaching down to grab the object, there's a frame where the characters hand pop onto the handles. I think it might need 1 or 2 more frames there. One the third lift, I think he starts shaking too soon. He's not even in his extreme pose when he starts buckling under the pressure.
That's about it for now. Even though it probably doesn't sound it from my critique, It's coming along nicely, though, so keep at it!
Magidion
03-06-2004, 06:46 PM
Ok, heres the next version
I think that the arms are looser and the arcs more defined. I Hope :)
I added more of an extreme pose before he shakes with the strain... Ah hell
Here's the NEW link (http://www.rit.edu/~abb0701/Box_Lift_04_01.mov)
Get back to me people. I love the feedback!!!!
thanks
Magi
CadDebunk
03-11-2004, 06:18 AM
Hey, looking good :)
I can't help feeling after seeing so many boxlift animations coming through the mill that there happens to be a lack of character or conflict to the scene. I know it's late in the game with this shot to make major changes, but maybe if you make another boxlift, consider doing something a little more outlandish that demo reel reviewers would find more interesting. I'mnot gonna make a suggestion because they never sound as good as I mean them to be. ;D
Also, I would suggest taking the time to make the animation of the character falling back onto the floor really nice. Hard to do.
Toodleoo
Magidion
03-17-2004, 05:05 AM
To be clear, this exercise was by request of the pot. employer but I do realize that the whole box lift idea is getting kinda tired but... for now this has been the project.
here is the new version. tell me what you think
Here's the link (http://www.rit.edu/~abb0701/BoxSmooth_02.avi)
thanks guys for all the feedback so far.
Magi
neonoodle
03-17-2004, 05:43 AM
I don't know why people think the box lift is "tired." It's a pretty standard weight test which is very hard to do well, and it's something that needs to be taught and learned more. I hate it when people want gimmicks and stuff thrown in... The box lift is a demonstration for showing the principle of adding weight to a non-existent 3D object... not a forum to spin a complex tale of happiness and woe. But I could be biased, since I recently completed a standard no frills box lift... or maybe just jealous that I didn't have the creativity to add some oomph to it by putting in a silly story. :(
About the link Magidion, I couldn't get the file to run due to some compression error. Otherwise I would have critiqued your new version. Sorry for the semi-off-topic rant.
Magidion
03-17-2004, 12:53 PM
TAKE TWO !
Damn! I'm sorry for the glitch!!
OK here's the new link
thanks for the patience
Link (http://www.rit.edu/~abb0701/BoxSmooth_03.mov)
Out!
Magi
SlamminJohn
03-17-2004, 02:29 PM
I like it. There is the arm twist at about 4 sec. which should be fixed, but other then that I liked it.
gj
bungatron71100
03-17-2004, 07:42 PM
I like the added second of strain where the shoulders shake and the flop. Good improvement on the animation. Maybe you could use a more dramatic camera angle to add some visual interest.
tintin
03-18-2004, 07:52 PM
Just a suggestion, but if you look at the line of his back when he is attempting to lift the box, it is a straight line, by arching his back you would be able to exaggerate his pose and make the animation more dynamic.
Magidion
03-19-2004, 04:06 PM
Hey folks I wanted to say that I appreciate all the great comments that you have given me. here is the latest and final version. I plan on rendering this out with shadows and etc.. for the demo, but this will do for crits.
thanks so much and I am so glad to be a part of this community
Here it the link (http://www.rit.edu/~abb0701/BoxSmooth_04.mov)
One LOVE!!!!
Magi
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