Enviroment/Character: Deepest

[pyraxis]

I really like the figure and the whirlwind effect but the composition feels almost as if it 's too big for the subject. Maybe the balance is thrown because the figure isn't quite in the center, I'm not sure. But something's bugging me about it.

Fins would be cool... what problems were you having with them? Gills would be hard to see at this size.

[Jan Sandahl]

Pyraxis: Thank you... Yeah I'm aware of the composition issue too. However I repainted an older image (which I fell in love with as it was one of the first I tried really hard to paint in acrylics) and I think I will try to reduce that issue by other means than redoing the whole damn thing. :-) At least it's way better, as a whole, than my old one. I have an idea about increasing the area of activity in the image center. Things like more elaborate and imaginative swirls/antennaes combined with a bit more expressive light and contrast.

Fins: The trouble is inventing nice ones that also strengthens the composition. I'm browsing for inspiring references right now. I think I´ll solve it though.

Gills: Yeah, but the same thing can be said about a nose if only size mattered, right?

[atenyotkin]

Hey Jan, I think it would be a great deal of help if we knew what's going on in that illustation. What's the focus of the drawing? Who is she? Is she transforming into something else? Who knows, perhaps her hair got cought in a tornado above her (just kidding--I'm not really that stupid :-) I'd don't really have an issue with her not being in the center, but the bright light from above... The environment looks like it belongs in the deepest part of the ocean, yet that bright light makes it seem like she's only a few feet bellow the surface. I'd also make her a mermaid (fish tail and everything,) but that's really up to you.

[Jan Sandahl]

atenyotkin: Well, she's getting her hair done. Now that's out of the closet. :-) No... There really isn't too much of a story behind it. If any, she's reacting to (or communicating through) a signal/message of some sort from above that manifests in whirls and light. I think something is trying to trick her into surfacing. I'm considering a second or more characters to enhance that idea.

Originally the image was too dark and had much more contrast. I felt it became that way because (to some extent) I couldn't do the scenery much better then. Maybe it has become too bright now, less mysterious?

Thanks for the input!

[Abominable]

I agree with what atenyotkin mentioned about the light vs. the depth for sure. It may be hard for you to stick the whole scene into the comosition you have but maybe you can tilt your POV a little. Then you could get some cool rocks in the immediate FG and put the surface of the ocean way back and up at the top in the BG. It would make for a bit more dramatic composition and enable you to get the whole idea across that you want to.

I think some sort fins are almost a must, not be cliche, but you need em. If i was living in the water I could not survive by flapping my legs around. The light that she's emitting would also light up the stairs more around her.

I think something is trying to trick her into surfacing.

I also think it would cool if you have her almost emitting from the landscpae like she's a spirit of sorts. Like you said if she's trying to be tricked, she should be more drawn out of the rocks yet still attached. Of course I just used the smudge tool to quickly give you a rough idea but I think if you elaborated on that it would be a great effect.

Thanks for sharing your work with everyone.

Cheers
http://members.shaw.ca/transfers/cgtalkjunk/deepest2.jpg

[Jan Sandahl]

Abominable:
I did a rough color/lighting test based on the feedback here. Ithought it enhanced the sense of drama in the image. Not sure about the tilting though... I placed some rough fins for testing too.

http://www.untitled.se/gf_files/05_contrast_test.jpg

[atenyotkin]

Hey, I've edited your image a bit to make the environment look a little bit deeper. It didn't come out exactly like what I had in mind, but what can one expect out of about 10 mins worth of work :-) For some reason I'm having the toughest time posting an image on here, so I just went ahead and uplaoded onto my jobs ftp...

http://www.rigastudios.com/deepsea.jpg

I also agree with Abominable about her being the spirit of the surroundings. So maybe making her part of it would be a good idea.

This painting is really great though, so even if you didn't change a bit, I'd still like it :o)

[Jan Sandahl]

atenyotkin:
Thanks for your active support, both to you and Abominable!

I see your point, and I might take it a little further in that direction. I'll keep posting.

[Jan Sandahl]

Due to lack of enough talent or practice in figuredrawing, I resorted to poser. Though, the figures may not look too much poseresque when I'm done with them. I find the image much more attractive in both drama and composition now.

http://www.untitled.se/gf_files/deepest_posertest.jpg

[LunaticSymphony]

Hmmm.

Of all the things you did, you picked Poser figures, which are flawlessly perfected, and used with anonymous images and such.

If you could paint over them with a "sea/ocean" skin type, rough, or rubbery, then, it would enhance it.

I liked your first tries, and YOU can put the darker shadows of larger underwater fish swimming about her, and perhaps a few octopii and other things, all focusing on HER>

Expose likes anything that is "customer" friendly.

[atenyotkin]

I like this way more than the original. Great job! I think it would be a cool idea if you make the bottom character (guy I guess,) a fish/mermaid type, and the ascending gal, well... just leave her as is. Kind of like she chose to be a human... I don't know. I honestly wouldn't change much at all now that I think about it... Very nice painting.

[Jan Sandahl]

Hey atenyotkin, that's actually a cool idea! She's lured to give up her origin for the calling from above. :-) That way I don't have to do her fins, hahaha...

Seriously, the only thing is that it would feel like running away from a task. Well, can't promise anything, we'll see. Great idea though. The guy will most certain not be much more "fishy". :-) Thanks for the appreciation!

Lunatic: I feel I did what I had to for the sake of the image. I killed my darling. :) I have no problem using poser. If I see a great image that moves me, I don't care about the methods. If I'm not getting an experience from an image I tend to be more critical about such things.

[Jan Sandahl]

Some changes in the male characters coloring and facial features. Also a second female character.

http://www.untitled.se/deepest_posertest3.jpg

[Jan Sandahl]

More swirl and special FX. ;-)

http://www.untitled.se/deepest_posertest4.jpg

[atenyotkin]

Great job Jan, it came out really nice. Are you still going to submit it to Expose II? I'd love to see it there. If you're planning to sumbit it, then I have more suggestion... if you have extra time, see if you can make some uplocse shots of the characters. Anyway, once again.. awesome job!!

[Jan Sandahl]

Thanks again for your support (and others) in this thread, atenyotkin! Of course I'm submitting it. :-) I have some detailing left to do, but not that much really.

Isn't close ups the choice of Ballistic Publishing, or am I missing something? It's already in hires. Or do you mean upsizing and repainting closeups?

[batavia]

Great progress.
What would be better is if you can make those 'trails' (or twirls) more uniform. I mean, they look really random right now. If you make a simple pattern out of it instead of random, I believe it can enhance the feel.

[atenyotkin]

Hey Jan... I am not really sure who does the close ups--I honestly never submitted anything to Ballistic Publishing. That was just a last thought anyway... your painting is exceptional as is!

Oh, and I don't really think uniform trails would enhance the image, but then again I try anything just to see what it looks like :-)

Hope I gave some constructive crits, and good luck with Expose II!!

[Jan Sandahl]

atenyotkin: You sure made my girlfriend happy. At a previous point in this image's history the contrast/lighting was more like the outcome of this remake. I first thought I'd made it more interesting when it got lighter, but after your remark I realised I had to go back. So you did contribute by helping me see things clearer. Thanks!

:-)

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